When he abruptly swung away and strode off, my stomach hitched. I knew he was experiencing some of the same bitter jealousy I’d just suffered through minutes earlier. But I couldn’t give him the same reassurances he’d just given me, not with Brandt standing right there.
What was worse, Brandt noticed something off. He harshly yelled, “Hey,” at Colton’s back, trying to call him back, but Colton kept going. “Huh.” He scratched his head. “I wonder what’s gotten into him.” Then he seemed to notice I was still there. “Do you want some coffee?” he asked as if it would be rude not to invite me.
“Oh!” Not expecting the offer, I blurted, “No—I mean, no, thanks. I have class too, sorry. I should…I should get going too.”
“No problem.” He waved as I began to back away from him. “I’ll see you at work some night, then.”
“Or not,” I reminded, sending him a sad smile.
“Holy shit,” he burst out. “That’s right. We don’t work together anymore, do we? Whoa.” The realization seemed to hit him hard before he shook his head. “No, wait. I promised Pick I’d stay on until he found a replacement, so we may have one or two more shifts together before…”
Before we never had a reason to see each other again.
He didn’t say that, though I knew it was what he meant. I was going to hate losing him as a coworker, but losing him as a friend…that might not be so bad. Being his friend Sunday night might have given him helpful advice, but it had ended up hurting Colton. I didn’t like that.
Not sure what else to say to Brandt because this conversation had just gotten awkward real fast, I smiled and nodded. “Cool.”
“I’ll see you at work then.” When I turned away, I tugged my phone from my bag, needing to explain everything to Colton.
Then I waited…and I waited. Ten of the longest, most excruciating seconds followed before he responded with:
It’s fine? It’s fine? It was never fine when someone said it was fine!
Or was that just for women? Maybe guys really thought it was fine when they said that, but it didn’t feel as if anything was fine.
Scowling, I started to type again, determined to make him understand he didn’t need to be jealous. But when I realized what I was doing, I grew a little upset.
I didn’t need to explain myself. I hadn’t done anything wrong. And Colton had said it was fine, so…why was I still worried?
I put my phone away and started toward my next class.
The next morning, Colton didn’t text me with a countdown of how many hours it was until our next encounter. And then he didn’t show up at all to philosophy. My worry grew, yet I was too scared to message him and ask if everything was okay. When I got nothing from him on Thursday morning either, I decided it was over. He was done with me and moving on.
To add to my misery, cramps began to assail me along with that icky bloated feeling of an approaching nasty period before that started a few hours later.
JULIANNA’S CHAPTER | 24
I was curled up on my couch on Thursday evening, home alone because my roommates were once again away with their boyfriends, and unable to do much past hold a warm cup of hot tea between my hands and stare at the clock ticking at a sloth’s pace over the quiet television when a knock came at my door.
My pulse raced. Was it Colton? I hadn’t been sure if he’d show up. We’d made plans for tonight and he’d never canceled, but we hadn’t talked since Tuesday either. And after he’d strode off in his jealous huff, I had no idea where that left us, if his fine was really fine or not.
If only I weren’t so freaking stubborn and hard-headed, I could’ve pushed until everything felt fine to me, and then I’d know exactly what was going on in his head right now. I wouldn’t be so self-conscious and confused and scared that I’d just ruined everything between us.
God, these stupid period hormones were making me batty.
Hey, yeah, this could all be my hormones’ fault.
A little mollified that I had a scapegoat to blame instead of my own stupid self, I set my tea on the coffee table and wrapped the blanket draped over my shoulders more snuggly around me. Then I shuffled my Angry Birds slippers to the door. I didn’t check the peephole because I didn’t want to be disappointed.
So I opened the door blind, only for instant relief to pour through me when I revealed a grinning Colton on the other side, resting his hands on either side of the doorframe as if he were happy and eager to see me in return.
Except the smile died instantly when he took in my blanket, slippers, pajama pants, and even the head scarf I’d already wound around my hair for the night. “What’s wrong? Are you sick?”
He started to step forward, concern etched in his features. But I held up a hand, stopping him in his tracks. “I didn’t think you were coming by tonight.”
Freezing, he arched a confused eyebrow before slowly saying, “But you said Thursday…right?”
I nodded, only to add, “And then you didn’t text yesterday or the day before that, and you weren’t in philosophy class yesterday.”