I said the first thing that came into my head. “I appoint you, Quinn.”
It was an impetuous decision. However, the more I turned the thought over the more it appealed to me. Quinn was the one I trusted the most. He tried to save me on the battlefield when everyone else gave up. Plus, he’d been a Master Necromancer in life. You didn’t reach that level without understanding how to lead your fellow mages.
Quinn would be fine.
A long moment passed in silence. “Did you hear what I said?” I asked.
“Yes, thank you for this honor.” The way Quinn said the words he seemed anything but appreciative. In fact, the man appeared downright confused by the fact that I wasn’t waving my Tsarina flag high. Why could no one understand that power wasn’t attractive to everyone?
“You’re most welcome,” I said.
Quinn shifted his weight from foot to foot. “What do you want to do with the Fantomes? Many wish to see them executed.”
“Don’t kill them.” I didn’t work this hard to save our people only to execute them without any thought. “No one murders the Fantomes. Just get them safely to Petra, and she’ll decide from there.” Quinn frowned, so I went on. “I want to try to rehabilitate them. I believe that some of the mages do want redemption.”
“So Petra will decide.”
“Yes.” This seemed safe. Petra hated bloodshed more than I did. Quinn opened his mouth, ready to ask another question. The longer this conversation went on, the more I’d be tempted to act as Tsarina.
Our chat needed to end.
I quickly stepped to the door, pulled it open, and gestured to the outer hall. “That’s all for now, Quinn. If you’ll excuse me, I need my rest.”
“As you wish, Tsarina.” Quinn bowed slightly and shuffled out into the hallway. With Quinn gone, I refocused my attention on Rowan. He hadn’t moved from his spot by the wall. “I am rather tired, Rowan, so…”
He kicked off the wall and turned to face me. The rugged lines of his face were set with determination. “And you wish me to leave?”
It took a force of will to say the next word. “Yes.”
Rowan stepped up until only an inch separated our bodies. A slow smile rounded his lips. “Now, who’s lying?”
And gods-damn it, he was right.
Still, I watched him saunter through the door, down the outer hallway, and out of my life. As he disappeared down the steps, I gripped the handle of my door so tightly my knuckles flared white.
Goodbye, Rowan. You may not agree, but what was between us has to be over.
Suddenly, every inch of my body felt empty. My eyelids had never felt heavier. I returned to bed, huddled under the sheets, and fell into a deep sleep.
In my dreams, I stepped along the road to Braddock Farm. Every footfall took a life’s age. No matter how quickly I tried to move, I never seemed to move forward. My old life seemed forever out of reach. Still, I wouldn’t give up.
Home was waiting.
I’d be back soon.
Chapter Thirty-Two
When I opened my eyes again, pale beams of morning light shifted across my bedroom wall. I pulled back my thin coverlet, padded across the floor, and peeped out the tavern window. The quiet town stretched out below me, a labyrinth of dirt roads flanked by rickety wooden buildings. I let out a relieved breath.
All the Necromancers were gone. They’d followed my orders.
A knock sounded on the bedroom door. “Who is it?” I asked.
“Tsarina, it’s Quinn.”
I gritted my teeth together. He’s still here and calling me Tsarina. That has to stop. I scooped up a small blanket from the bed and wrapped it around my shoulders. “Come in, please.”
The door swung open, and Quinn stepped inside the room. In the morning light, it was even clearer how the markings on his face were actually a part of his skin. What kind of spell had I cast, anyway? I’d been out of my head when it came to me. I won’t be able to access hybrid magick again. All the bone crawlers were gone, so that option was closed. And working to access the hybrid power through Rowan? I wasn’t going near him again if I could ever avoid it. Plus, I didn’t know how to control that power without burning up. I was lucky that Quinn and the others seemed well and healthy.
Quinn spoke, jarring me from my thoughts. “Good morning, Tsarina.”
“Why are you here, Quinn? I asked you to go.”
“I have need of your wisdom. It will only take a minute, Tsarina.”
“Please. Call me by my first name. Elea.”
“As you command, Elea.”
I opened my mouth, ready to argue the fact that I wasn’t commanding anything. But I shut it just as quickly. Let him think whatever he likes. Soon enough, they’ll all be taking orders from Petra and forget all about me. Even as I tried to rationalize this thought, some small part of me screamed that was impossible. My old life was gone. They’d always see me as their maker. Meanwhile, the Necromancers I’d freed saw me as their savior, Ada and Veronique included. I wasn’t sure how I felt about any of that, to be honest.
No point worrying about it now.