“I’m not talking a Mercedes.” His gaze held mine hard. “Your wish is to blend in, remember?” A shrug. “Since you stated there are no threats coming after you, we’ll find a nice, loyal car for what you can afford.”
“Okay,” I agreed. “I actually prefer shit cars. Makes you appreciate them more.”
He snickered softly. “I said a nice, loyal car…not shit.”
“I talk code, too. Don’t try to fool me.”
He was still laughing. “I’m beginning to see why I like you in the future.”
I wasn’t sure what it said about me, but the clunker I ended up with was definitely a ‘nice, loyal car’ and I was pretty sure I had driven older cars when in 2035, which some might think was damn sad. But driving in this clunker was a halfway smooth ride, and I just enjoyed being able to drive a car that didn’t jerk and groan when I pressed on the gas or stepped on the brake.
What I wasn’t thrilled about was when I had to pay six months rent up-front at the apartment complex, since I didn’t have any previous landlord references. I grumpily handed over a portion of my cash for the furnished apartment. As I signed away what seemed like my life on the rental agreement, it wasn’t really a shock when I was told that my new apartment was number 203. As my license stated. Elder Farrar hung around, snooping through my apartment while I did my own investigation. The place was small, with one bedroom and new—Elder Farrar stated they were—appliances and carpeting and paint.
His next action surprised me. He bent and gave me a quick hug. But his tone was serious. “Remember what I said about not messing with time.” His dark head of hair teetered back and forth. “I believe you’re here because you’re supposed to be. But for how long that is, you never know.” He straightened, thumping my nose with a pointed finger. “If you need me, you can obviously find me.” His eyes flashed golden…and he was just gone.
I was alone.
With the damn memory of him this morning telling me to have fun on my trip.
Tears instantly welled and I locked my front door to the world I didn’t know.
I wandered into the bedroom I was to call home. Fell onto a bed I had never slept in before. Sobbed in huge shuddering gasps and gripped my cold pillow tight. And wished this nightmare would end soon, as the 1993 Elder Farrar had stated it might.
It didn’t end soon.
The first week, I left my apartment only to buy take-out, purchase a few necessities for general living, and get my utilities turned on. The rest of my time I spent lying on my bed, praying this would end. I wanted Sin.
The second week, I went a little insane. I watched television when I wasn’t lying in bed crying and missing everyone, and I picked at the paint on my bedroom wall. I wanted Sin.
The third week, I bought a vacuum and trash bags and housework supplies to clean my mess from the previous two weeks—when I wasn’t watching television or lying in bed with my box of tissues. I wanted Sin.
The fourth week, I debated buying a dog for company. Except the landlady told me it was against the rental agreement I had signed. So I sobbed about that, along with everything else, while watching television or lying in bed or vacuuming the carpet. I wanted Sin.
The fifth week, the landlady dropped by with a very fake, concerned expression on her face and handed me a business card…then kindly reminded me I had neighbors beside, above, and below me. I tore up the card for the counselor and stuffed my head down on the pillow to cry, muffling the sound. I needed Sin.
During the sixth week, I came to the realization I wasn’t just depressed. I was becoming suicidal. Before I started debating Russian roulette too seriously, I pulled myself from the drudgery of my self-pity, tucked away the one person who meant everything to me but was wrecking my sanity from missing him so much, and sucked it up. My life sure as hell wasn’t getting any better.
But it was still a damn life.
The only plus during my single-handed downslide was that I had come to the decision that the One and I were attracted to each other. But nothing could ever develop from our attraction because the One lived at the Temple and was faithful to the Temple, while I lived in this world and was faithful to this world. Both of us lived completely separate lives. Our attraction was mostly just attraction.
I didn’t want him. I knew that now.
Because of the lifestyle I had decided, living with the consequences of existing outside the Temple, I now resided in 1993.
I entered the first seedy bar I could find and started making friends.
While I listened. And learned.
Finally, I was ready to return to my roots.
Chapter Thirty-One