“I need?” I asked her.
She nodded. “Other than the obvious shower, shampoo, condition, wax, and…a lot. I can have them set you up in a private room. At least then you can shower and get rid of those horrid raccoon eyes. Food? Is there anything you want?”
“Food?”
“Please stop repeating everything I say.” She frowned and then shook her head. “Fine. Don’t worry about anything. I’ll let your brain catch up before I ask any more questions. Just make sure to eat and sleep…this you is over.”
She stood up and when she reached the doors, Jimmy ran back over to her like a fox with its tail between his legs.
“Ivy.” Her tone changed…eerily so and much politer. “This is Mr. Keely. Mr. Keely, this is Ivy. I’m re-introducing you to her because whoever she was to you before no longer compares to who she is now. If she stubs her big toe, I’ll blame you. If she’s uncomfortable in any way, I’ll blame you. If anyone knows I came here, I’ll blame you. Am I clear?”
“Yes, ma’am.” He nodded at her.
“Brilliant. Please don’t forget, my grandson handles reminders very messily. I wouldn’t even want to imagine how angry he’d be if something happened to his fiancée.”
“His what?” Jimmy and I both said.
She didn’t reply to him and just patted my head gently. “Remember, eat, sleep…and maybe brush your hair, dear.”
Just like that she walked out, her heels clicking as she went.
“What the hell just happened?” I whispered.
“How the fuck should—” He paused, eyes wide when he looked back at me. “Ugh…I’ll arrange your room…ma…Ms. O’Davoren. How about you go eat? We can have something brought to you.”
No fucking way. If he didn’t look like he was in so much physical pain just getting the words out, I’d think I was dreaming. He didn’t bother asking anything else. Instead, he undid the zip ties around my wrists before reaching down and undoing the chains around my feet. Rubbing my sore wrists, I couldn’t stop staring at him, wondering what alien had hijacked his body. He didn’t even lift me up out of my chair.
“What day is it?” I asked.
“Tuesday.”
I smiled. “It’s spaghetti and meatballs at the caf today.”
“Suit yourself,” he muttered before speaking into his mic next. “Door.”
The door slid open in front of us.
I walked out first and immediately put my hands to my sides. When I stepped into the hall, I was convinced…this was the twilight zone. Three men had to carry me, handcuffed and chained, into that room not even an hour ago. I could see them, Mr. Muscle Head, Mr. Hot Breath, and the creeper with blue eyes, on the other side of the glass windows. They all looked at me as if I were the strange one. I hadn’t changed. I was still Ivy. They were the ones acting weird. They stared at me until I made eye contact, then pretended to be busy with something.
“Door,” Jimmy said again once we came to the end of the hall.
I didn’t realize we were in some other section of the prison until the door opened and I saw the control room.
“Walk quickly,” he said but didn’t rush me.
Nodding, I walked through fast, keeping my head down until I got to the metal stairs, which spiraled down until I got to the bottom.
“Door. General. One in,” Jimmy said and the door opened, and finally I knew where I was…the cafeteria.
He, thankfully, didn’t follow me in. And it was normal here, no one staring, so I quietly grabbed a tray and walked toward the line. I’d just placed the milk onto my tray when a pair of short, stubby hands reached out and took it.
“If it ain’t Psycho Ivy, everybody!”
Aww, come on! I didn’t have the energy for a fight today!
“Who’d you have to blow to get out of solitary—”
Before she could finish her sentence, someone grabbed her wrist, and we both looked up at this…middle-aged woman with olive skin and wavy black hair.
“Who the fuck are—”
The woman squeezed tighter, and I glanced around for the guards, but they were looking away…
“Non ho male a nessuno dal 1984...ma posso,” she said to her, and I would have guessed it was Spanish but judging from the confused look on her face I would’ve been wrong.
“Translation.” Another woman stepped up behind her. “Sit down, shut up before you get hurt, dwarf.”
“It will take more than you two Italian hags to—” Dallas froze when she noticed that the two women who were her backup…didn’t back her up. Instead, they ate their food in the corner. “Hey.”
“Two? Count again,” the first woman said to her, the grip on her wrist unmoving.
I wasn’t sure when it happened or how it was happening, but the whole cafeteria was silent, which would be terrifying enough, if it weren’t for the scowls…the clear warning that came across at least a dozen of the women, from what I could count at least. The warning was a simple one: do you have a death wish?
Stunned, I looked at the only person reacting normally near me: Dallas, who looked ready to piss herself. Which must have been enough for the women because they let her arm go.
“Apologize,” the second woman said.
“Sorry,” Dallas said to me.
“And her milk?” the wavy-haired one demanded.
“Right,” Dallas muttered, putting the milk back on my tray. When they didn’t say anything more, she walked as fast as she could back to her table. She wasn’t the only one. The Italian women did the same without a word to me either.
I couldn’t move. I didn’t really know what to do.
And apparently, I didn’t have to do anything either. Because no one walked in front of me. Instead, some other people put their dessert on my tray, causing me to move again, but on autopilot, not even blinking when the woman behind the counter gave me much more food than she normally does. Lifting the tray, I turned around to look for somewhere to sit when this voice entered my mind…
You can sit anywhere, Ivy.
Testing my theory, I walked to the fullest table I could find and just stood there. Not even a second later, they got up, not one or two, but all of them…every last one of them got up.
Sitting down, I took the straw and stuck it into my milk before looking back up. Just like the guards, they stared and avoided my gaze.
And as I drank, watching them as they watched me, something clicked.
Ah…so this is power, I thought.
Power. Influence. People feared and respected stuff like that. I knew that…
I’d just…never experienced it…
No. That was a lie. I had experienced it every time they’d thrown me into that dark cell, every time they’d patted me down, or when I’d lost a fight, or when the judge had thrown me in here, or when the shitty lawyer they’d given me had thrown me to the wolves, and when my dad had lost his life.
I’d experienced power and influence.
I’d just never had any myself.
Now I did.
So I took comfort in their fear. Because it meant one thing…the Callahans really were as powerful as everyone used to say. I could keep my promise.
They’ll pay. I swear it, Daddy.
FIVE
“She had not known the weight until she felt the freedom.”
~ Nathaniel Hawthorne