Simply Charming
Princess Rose rings a bell, and the RLWs in attendance stop whispering and stand at attention.
“Thank you for joining me for today’s special ceremony,” she says in a reverent tone as I stand beside her and do my best not to cringe. “It’s been two intense days of royal prep work with Miss Gillian Cobbler in my private chambers, but I am pleased to say today that she is officially ready to join you as a Royal Lady-in-Waiting!”
The RLWs clap demurely. They’re dressed head to toe in pink (I’m still wearing my blue uniform) and have on pink sashes that look like Princess Rose’s. She places one over my head, pins a gold rose pin on my lapel, and makes my welcome into the club official. The girls applaud louder. I think I’m going to throw up.
This is the first time I’ve been in the club chambers for more than a few moments. When I burst into their tea the other afternoon and announced my desire to join, Princess Rose explained that I would have to do some intense “royal thinking” with her before becoming a member. (I wasn’t even allowed to stay long enough to have a tea biscuit.)
Turned out “royal thinking” was code for two days of lady training and questions like: “How would a royal slay a dragon?” Answer: “Have someone else do it for them.” So far, Princess Rose hasn’t said anything that has helped me in the mole hunt. If anything, spending so much time with her has only made my life thornier. I’ve missed meals with my friends and my excuses (Extra detention! Vegetable picking in the garden! Private fencing lesson! Magic Carpet extra help!) are wearing thin.
I just hope becoming a member of this club is worth my time. The smell of roses in this room is overpowering. So is the color pink on the walls, the carpet, and the cotton candy–tinted couches. I let my eyes adjust to the frilly lace curtains and throw pillows on every seat. Flora’s daughters, Azalea and Dahlia, eye me skeptically as they stand there in rainbow-hued gowns. I have to watch what I say around those two.
“To Gillian!” Princess Rose cheers. She points a pink wand at the ceiling and confetti and balloons fall, nearly blinding me with glitter. Everyone cheers. A few pieces get in my mouth and I sputter. “Have a seat next to me,” Rose adds, and sits in the center of her adoring group on a hot-pink throne. The princess is (shocker) wearing her signature color and her blond hair is pulled back in a long braid. I quickly tuck in my dress shirt, which I just noticed was hanging out of my skirt. This silly sash is making that easy task nearly impossible.
“Girls!” Raza, a sprite foreign exchange student from a reform school in Hadingford, jumps out of her seat in a very unladylike fashion. I’m just saying. “It’s time for our pledge.” The merriment in the room dies down as all the ladies stand, wave their handkerchiefs in the air, and face Rose. I try to copy them, but I haven’t memorized the whole pledge yet. Tessa leads the RLWs as they speak in harmony.
“I solemnly swear that I will uphold the Royal Ladies-in-Waiting pledge with my whole heart. I will honor the royals who give tirelessly on commoners’ behalf by:
being a good and obedient servant,
answering our royals’ call to duty whenever or whatever it may be,
being the lady they need me to be despite my common (or unremarkable) upbringing,
putting their needs before my own no matter the cost,
and remembering that wearing this pink sash means I am worthy of being a princess even though it’s impossible for me to actually be one.
Nevertheless, I will cherish the opportunity to serve royalty to the best of my ability all the days of my life and consider myself charmed.”
Are these girls missing a screw or what? Worthy of being a princess even though I can’t be one? Charmed because I can serve royalty?
Princess Rose gives them a standing ovation. “Charming!” She curtsies and they do the same. I tumble into Raza on my attempt.
“A few orders of business before we begin.” Tessa produces a scroll. “The Royal Ladies-in-Waiting spent our day off this week shining glass slippers and jewels for the princesses under the watchful eyes of Pete and the Dwarf Police Squad, and we were so honored to do so! We are very much looking forward to visiting Princess Ivy’s talk ‘Sorcery: A Royal’s Greatest Gift or Downfall?’ and were pleased that our royal offering of lilies was accepted with charm by Princess Snow. Our next RLW fund-raiser—pink, scented handkerchiefs—is sure to be a huge seller at school,” she adds with a squeak. “Who couldn’t use a little color pick-me-up in our dreary school uniforms?” I bite my lip to keep from laughing.