“Charlotte Bliss, where are you?” Always unpredictable, Rachel had let herself in the front door with a great, undignified shout.
I was sitting briefly in Nonie’s room, where she was watching a daytime talk program on one of the two television channels we could receive, with Michael playing with blocks on the floor nearby. Her room was close to the nursery at the front of the house, and the door was open, so Rachel’s entry was clearly audible. Nonie raised her eyebrows, but I couldn’t help but smile.
Would Rachel have announced herself that way if Olivia had been alive? Absolutely not. If Press had been home? Maybe. But it heartened me that she thought I wouldn’t mind.
I leaned over the gallery railing.
“Here we are, Rachel.”
She peered up at me.
When she saw my drab day dress, she waved a dismissive hand. “What are you wearing? You all look like one of those sad ladies in a vacuum cleaner advertisement. The before picture—you know, when she’s all covered up in dust bunnies and baby goo.”
I smiled. “You’re too kind.” Seeing her enormous stomach again, I thought I’d better go down to meet her, rather than ask her to come up. I hurried downstairs.
“You look wonderful. As always. You’re glowing.” I kissed her cheek.
Rachel looked down and lightly touched the pouf of fuchsia below the empire waist of her top.
“Balls! I am not. I’m hardly showing at all.” She grinned at her own joke.
In truth, Rachel was almost always glowing. It was only when she was sick with the flu or some other malady that she didn’t look her best. Even then, she simply looked wan, like the exotic heroine of a dime-store novel.
I noticed Terrance standing respectfully at the entrance to the dining room. All morning, I’d been wrestling with the desire to ask him about Michael Searle and Olivia.
“Yes, Terrance?”
“Shall I prepare some iced tea, ma’am? A plate of cakes in the morning room?”
The lantern was still set up in the morning room, and the thought of Rachel seeing it worried me. What would she say about it? I had told her about seeing Olivia, but she would truly think me insane if I described what I’d seen only hours earlier. And I would never in a million years tell her what I’d seen between the boys who looked like Jack and Press.
“How about the salon?” I looked at Rachel.
“Just bring them up to milady’s room, Terrance. I’m going to get this beastly girl into some proper clothes and take her away for a civilized lunch. I may not even bring her back until tomorrow. How’s that for a scandal?”
“Very good, Miss Rachel.”
Terrance returned to the kitchen.
“Rachel, I can’t go anywhere. I really don’t want to see anyone.” Except for my brief visit to her house, I hadn’t been out since the funeral. The idea of being around a crowd caused my gut to seize with panic. Not only was it too soon, but there would be the stares. I was the woman who had gotten drunk and let her daughter die.
“Don’t say no, Charlotte. Do it for me. Please?” She took my hand. “Soon I’ll be stuck in the house forever. Please? Just for a few hours.” Her eyes were pleading, like a child’s.
It was a typically selfish rationale, and I almost told her so. “It’s too soon. Nonie doesn’t feel well today. Michael is such a handful.” Yet another lie. It was getting easier. The excuse that Nonie didn’t feel well had simply sprung to my lips.
“Marlene is here. You’ve let Marlene watch the—” Here, she stumbled. Rachel, who hardly ever misspoke, had been about to say “the children.” Recovering quickly, she lowered her voice. “I’ll speak to Marlene if you want me to. You know she won’t mind.”
First she had told Terrance that he should take tea to my bedroom, and now she was about to make decisions about with whom Michael should be left. I wasn’t in the mood to deal with her bossiness, but somewhere I found the patience to deal with her pleasantly. I tried again to distract her.
“You should take your mother to lunch. What’s she doing? You said she was anxious about the baby. Being a grandmother.”
Rachel rolled her eyes. “Jesus, Charlotte. She’s been practicing her bubbe act since I got my first period. Yesterday she decided that the baby’s not going to be a boy after all and came back from Lynchburg with a car full of everything pink. She’s completely wrong, of course. You have to save me from her.”
I glanced up at the gallery, thinking about the morning room. If I left, would I miss my chance to see more? Would Olivia abandon me?
Misunderstanding, Rachel grabbed my hand and held it in both of hers. “Let’s get you changed. You know getting away for a while is the best thing.” She brought my hand to her lips to give it a quick kiss. “Let’s go, darling.”