“I can imagine. Austin and I wanted to have kids. I prayed for a miracle to be pregnant after he was killed so I could have a piece of him here with me. Of course, it didn’t work out that way.” In all honesty, it would’ve been difficult to raise a baby on my own, but I would’ve given anything to have a part of Austin with me.
“I know you miss him,” she murmured. The halls were so quiet that her voice echoed off the walls. “I can’t say that I’ve exactly been in your shoes, but I know how you feel. Years ago when I lost Scott, my world crashed in all around me. It’s never easy when you lose someone you love. The hardest part is letting your heart move on without feeling guilty. I’m sure Austin wouldn’t want you to be alone for the rest of your life.”
A tear slid down my cheek. She lost her Scott because he was sick with cancer and had overdosed on medication, but I lost Austin in a horrific game for someone’s viewing pleasure. No, Austin wouldn’t want me alone for the rest of my life, but it was hard to want happiness when he had been ripped out of this world in such a gruesome way.
“How did you move on without feeling guilty? I’m not interested in that kind of relationship right now, but just the thought scares me. It doesn’t seem right,” I cried.
She stopped and a sad smile played across her lips when she looked at me. “I wasn’t interested in anyone else for a long time after Scott died. I blamed myself for his death. Austin was ripped away from you, and that pain will always be in your heart. You don’t have to forget him or stop loving him. When you finally open yourself up to someone, that’s when the void will start to close. The hardest part is allowing yourself to do that. You’ll get there.”
“What if I don’t?” The thought of being alone for the rest of my life terrified me. I just needed the courage to open up my heart again.
“You will,” she murmured. “I have faith in you. Now brace yourself, my dear. Things are about to get interesting.” She turned us down another hallway, and suddenly there were other voices echoing off the walls. We stopped by the doorway to the locker room and I immediately got an eyeful. The blood rushed to my cheeks, but I couldn’t look away. Evan was in there, along with a dozen other guys, but none of them mattered to me. I couldn’t take my eyes off his bare backside and thick thighs. His muscles rippled and tensed with his movements, and as soon as he turned around I hastily averted my gaze.
“Okay, are we done here?” I asked hurriedly. Good lord, what was she thinking? Heck, what was I thinking working with these guys?…Oh crap, I was in trouble. My cheeks flamed and all I wanted to do was run out of the room. Who was I kidding? I wanted to lift my gaze and stare. Biting my lip, I tried to keep my focus on the floor, but my eyes fought me every step of the way.
“Nope, you’re coming with me.” Taking my hand, she pulled me into the locker room, and there was no way I could keep the embarrassment from showing on my face. Whistles and shouts erupted in the room, but thankfully we got out of there fast and disappeared behind a door where the team coach sat at his desk. “Summer, I’d like you to formally meet our coach, Joel Harris.”
Joel stood up and held out his hand. He was dressed in a pair of track pants and a Cougars T-shirt and had combed-over salt-and-pepper hair. He was Cooper’s uncle, and I could definitely see the family resemblance. “Summer, it’s nice to meet you. I hear you’re going to be with us for a couple of weeks.”
I took his hand and shook it. The thought of seeing Evan’s naked flesh burned in my mind. How was I going to be able to do this for two weeks? “I am. Thank you for letting me work with the team.”
“It’s my pleasure. I’ve been to your restaurant, but for the life of me I don’t know if it was you or your sister I talked to.”
“It was most likely my sister. I usually stick to the behind-the-scenes stuff.” Lara was always the sociable one.
He let my hand go and sat back down at his desk. “I understand that. I’m sure Kate will take care of you while you’re here. Gary’s already waiting for you down the hall.”
Kate smiled and backed up toward the door. “Thanks, Joel. We’ll be out in a couple of hours. Make sure the guys don’t get hurt while we’re in class.”
He chuckled. “I’ll try. But you know how excited they’re going to be with a new ray of sunshine here.”
Kate snorted. “Tell me about it. I’ve already warned them, and so has Evan.”
I dreaded going back out into the locker room. I didn’t want to have to walk past the guys again with my face as red as a lobster. Luckily, they were all gone. “?‘A new ray of sunshine’?” I asked. “I’m assuming he was talking about me.”
She laughed. “Yep. No pun intended, Summer. When I first started with the team, a few of them faked injuries so they could get one-on-one time with me. They learned pretty quick that I didn’t play games. I’m sure they’ll test the waters again now that you’re here.”
“But your brother warned them, too? Why would he do that?”
Her face broke out into a smile. “I don’t know. He’s just a protective type of guy. Why do you ask?”
“No reason,” I said quickly. “I was just curious.” It was more than that, but I wasn’t about to admit it to myself.
Chapter 4
Summer