“The thought of him touching you makes me sick.” There was a sharp edge to his voice.
She pulled away to see his face. “Prince Kerdan has fed and clothed me. That is all.” He needed to believe the truth of her words.
“He hasn’t…forced you to do anything against your will?”
“No.” Although Kerdan allowed everyone to believe that was the case.
“Why are you in his bedchamber if not to…service his desires?”
Allyssa’s face turned red. At first, she too had mistakenly assumed that was why he’d brought her here. “I’m here so he can ensure my safety.”
Odar’s eyes narrowed. “Explain.”
“The prince wants to get rid of Jana and her children. He’s hinted at forming an alliance.”
“Between Russek and Emperion?”
“No. Between him and me.”
He ran his hands through his hair. “When Prince Kerdan took you to his room, I felt utterly helpless.” He gazed into her eyes. “All my planning and training, and I couldn’t even protect you. If anything happened to you, I’d never forgive myself. I promise to get you out of here. You don’t need to form an alliance with your enemy.”
“Don’t you see—escaping Russek isn’t enough. If there’s a way to stop the war, I have to take it.”
“Your parents will find a way to stop the war. I will find a way to sneak you out of this castle and to safety.”
Why didn’t he understand the unique position she was in? “If I can do something to help my people, I’m going to do it.”
“You can’t help your people if you’re dead,” he snapped. “And what if Kerdan is just using you? I can’t risk you being hurt or killed.” He put his hands on her shoulders, as if he could shake some sense into her.
But this wasn’t about what Odar wanted; this was about doing what was best for her kingdom. Emperion—her people—would always come first.
“I love your loyalty and devotion,” he said. “I even understand it. But you must ensure your survival.” He dropped his hands from her shoulders.
She lowered her voice. “While I don’t trust Kerdan, we have a common goal—to dethrone Jana. I believe we can work together to accomplish that.” Although she had no idea how they would get rid of her unless they killed her. Which would probably result in Allyssa’s own death. But if it meant saving her people, it was a small price to pay. “What do you know of him?”
“Not much.” Odar paced back and forth before the hearth. “Has he truly not laid a hand on you?”
She wanted to question him about the rumors she’d heard about him kissing Shelene, but she didn’t feel like discussing that right now, so she said, “No, he hasn’t.”
He stopped pacing and faced her. “I thought if I dangled my arm in front of Shelene and Jana, the focus would be on Fren and not on you. I thought I could bargain for your freedom.”
Instead, Kerdan had beaten him to it. “It wouldn’t have made a difference.” This wasn’t about Fren, its army, or amassing power. It was about destroying Emperion. It was about revenge.
“Fine. I’ll continue to pretend I’m going to marry Shelene. You find out if Kerdan will formally align with us.” He emphasized the word us. “However, if you have an opportunity to escape, I want you to take it. Get on a horse and go east, straight to Fren. I will deal with the ramifications here. You just get yourself to safety. This family is crazy, and I can’t think straight when you’re in danger.”
She went over to him, taking his hands in hers and squeezing them tightly. Being in his presence grounded her.
“There isn’t anything I wouldn’t do to see you safe,” he said. He leaned down to kiss her when the door opened, and Kerdan came in.
“Time’s up,” he said. “I need to take Prince Odar back to the royal wing before someone realizes he’s missing.” His eyes zeroed in on their clasped hands.
Allyssa let go of Odar, taking a step away from him. “You’re staying in the royal wing?” she asked. Why wasn’t he in the guest wing?
“He’s staying in a private bedchamber next to Shelene’s rooms,” Kerdan clarified. “I assume Jana wants to keep an eye on him.”
She nodded. That made sense. Although, it also made her want to claw Shelene’s eyes out. How far would Odar go to maintain the ruse?
“Stay safe,” Odar whispered as he leaned down and kissed her cheek. “Don’t forget what I told you—if you have the chance, take it.”
She watched him head toward the door. Kerdan withdrew the sack and put it over Odar’s head, once again concealing his identity.
***
Kerdan entered the bedchamber, carrying a tray piled high with food. He set it down on the low table and reached under the back of his tunic, pulling out a book and tossing it to Allyssa. She caught it and read the cover: A Secret Affair. She glanced up at him, raising her eyebrows. A romance book?
“I know what you’re thinking,” he mumbled, plopping on the chair across from her. “But it was all I could find that would be acceptable for you to read without raising suspicion.” Remaining in Kerdan’s room was rather boring, so she tucked the book on her lap, happy to have some form of entertainment for tomorrow.
He leaned forward and started slurping the soup. “Have what you want,” he said between bites, motioning to the tray.
“I take it you spend the vast majority of your time with your army and not at court?”
He nodded. “Why do you ask?”
“No reason.”
He wiped his mouth on his sleeve, his cheeks turning pink.
She grabbed a slice of bread and glanced out the dark window. Not a single star was visible. “Thank you for allowing me to see Prince Odar earlier today,” she said, peering at the tray. She wished Kerdan would bring hot tea; she was thoroughly sick of plain water.
“I hadn’t factored him into my plans,” he said around a mouthful of food. “However, if you want to include him, we can. He’s a good fighter and seems to be fairly intelligent.” He glanced up at her with a look she couldn’t quite discern.
He used the word we. Interesting word choice. Taking another bite of bread, trying to act as casual as possible, Allyssa said, “And what exactly is your plan?”
Kerdan leaned back in the chair, studying her. “What I say does not leave this room. Agreed?” She nodded. “If you so much as breathe a word of this to anyone, I will slit your throat.”
“Charming.”
“I don’t put on airs around you. There’s no need.”