More sheets fluttered away and sailed toward the ground. I half wanted to rush over and grab one. Those would be really handy on the job.
Someone grabbed the hungry newbie and pulled it to the side. The throng of monsters parted in front of me, revealing a naked vampire in human form blocking my way. Huge and rippled with muscle. His fangs were elongated, distending his jaw, and his eyes were wells of black. Not handsome like many of the others, it looked like his face had been hit with a bat a few times. Nothing else had changed yet, meaning he had some control. When he stepped forward, though, showing a jerky movement, I realized that while he might not be a newbie, he wasn’t far from it. His control to keep from biting me and draining me dry would be slippery, at best. A fight would bring out his urges that much more.
Not to mention he was a mammoth of a man.
He had been sent to kill me. Or try, anyway. Clearly this was a test.
“Well holy-moly, look at you. You’re a big mother-trucker.” I whistled. The vampires around me made a circle, either trying to keep me from running, or excited for the fight. Probably both.
“It’s a lovely day in the neighborhood…” I sang as I took out my sword. I paused. “I am supposed to kill you, right? We aren’t getting ready for a thumb war?”
“Oou’re aun insif-icat ooman!” Meat-grinder Face said.
“What’s that? You’ve got fangs in your mouth…”
“Fight to the death,” a lovely voice rang out, musical and cultivated.
“And that is why the human form is so useful. Communication.” I ripped out my gun, sighted, and shot. The bullet tore through the big vamp’s chest, just missing his heart.
Dang it. That was almost cool.
I shot him in the legs. Mostly.
He crumpled to the ground with a roar.
I slammed my gun in its holster and ran forward. The huge vampire roared again as his body changed. He flailed and then pushed himself upward, roaring a third time.
“You’re angry, we get it.” I kicked him in the face, flinging him away from one of his planted hands. I swung down with my sword. It hacked into his neck a fraction, not even making it a quarter of the way through.
“Holy shiznit—what are you made of, iron?” I hacked down again as his tree-trunk arm lashed out. I dove over it and rolled back onto my feet, pushing the circle of vampires wider.
Meat-grinder staggered to his feet, and I could see that his neck was already trying to stitch itself back together. This one healed at an incredible rate, even for a vampire. I saw now why they’d chosen him.
His fist came around, fast. I ducked and thrust forward, stabbing him through the stomach, a nonlethal area. He staggered back instead of bending over it, so I hammered a foot into his balls. He bent in time to meet my fist’s upward swing. His nose smashed, sending a gush of black blood over his face. I leapt onto his chest like a spider monkey, helping his backward fall. His arms windmilled, but there was too much momentum.
Timber!
I rode him down until his back hit the ground. Nimbly, I hopped off, planted my feet to either side of him, and stabbed down with everything I had. The blade pierced his chest, prompting a monstrous sort of squeal. Thick black sludge oozed out of his chest while his body started to disintegrate.
Panting, I took a cloth from my pouch and wiped off my blade. I dropped the cloth on the body, since it had to be cleaned up anyway, and started forward, continuing down the path again.
A stringy vampire in its fighting form hissed at me as I passed by. When I didn’t react, it leaned toward my neck.
I turned and thrust my sword through the vampire’s gut. Its eyes rounded and the hiss turned into a howl. It staggered backward, holding its stomach.
“Don’t do that.” I shook my head at it and took out another cloth—I’d brought several.
The vampires above me, which had been right at the edge of the platform to watch my fight, turned almost as one and began clearing out. The minions around me continued to dog my steps, irritatingly close.
“While I have your ear,” I said conversationally, trying to keep my rage at bay. I really wanted to go on a vampire-killing spree. “Am I going the right way?”
“For a while longer,” someone mumbled. He grunted a moment later, probably from an elbow to his ribs.
I sneaked a glance behind me and saw a very attractive guy about my age. “Resisting the swamp-thing look, huh? Are you new to all this?”
He nodded before scowling, clearly annoyed he’d answered again.
We continued on, all my new friends and me, until the air smelled heavy and moist. We were deep underground, probably amidst the oldest vampires who had ever walked the Realm or the Brink.
The surroundings had become almost catacomb-like those last few hundred feet, but they opened up again and spread out into a huge chamber fit for a king. At the far wall was a massive table with ornate chairs seated around it. A beautiful chandelier made of crystal, gold, and probably diamonds hung down in the middle. Nothing was on the table at the moment, but it made me wonder what typically adorned it when the vampires met. I knew they didn’t have to eat food, but had no idea if they did it anyway as sort of an homage to their former life.
The flock of newbie vamps shifted their flight pattern to the right. I dutifully stayed within the haphazard circle, just to keep everything moving, until we came to a throne-like chair against a heavily decorated wall. Gold and precious gems adorned the stately seat, and beside it were two lesser chairs with a smidgen less finery.
“Wow,” I muttered. “Who gets the little chairs? And don’t say wives, because that’s just messed up.”
“Wait here,” one of the newbies said. My new friends drifted to the side of the chamber.