When he turned to me in defense of his stupid semantics, I could have broken and said it didn’t.
“It does.”
“Fine. I went looking for him.”
“Carter! Are you crazy?”
“You think I can’t handle myself?”
“He doesn’t play fair. He and his friends are drug dealers. There’s one of you and dozens of them.”
“Memorize the following . . . Carter can handle himself.”
I thought I trusted him to be safe when he was with me. I thought all I had to do was let go of the fear that I put men in danger. I thought if we were together, Vince would just realize he couldn’t get to me, and he’d go away. I had no idea Carter would go running into a fight to make some macho point.
“You know what? I’m going to just stay home. Tell Darlene I’ll work on ‘Make Him Yours’ here.”
I popped the door open and went to my gate. Punched the code like a prizefighter. Swung it open like a home-run hitter.
He caught up to me at the front door.
“First of all,” he said, “don’t leave the gate open behind you.”
“Go away.”
“I can’t.”
I put my back to the door. He stood with me on the narrow step, our bodies practically touching.
“Then why did you drop me?”
“Drop you?”
“Gave me to Fabian. Whatever.”
His face went full confusion. Open mouth. Knotted brows.
“What? Cat got your tongue?”
“I switched with Fabian so I could be with you.”
Now I was the one who went full confusion. The traffic in my brain stopped short, creating a ten-car pileup of reactions.
“What did you think?” he asked. “I kissed you in the car so I could get away from you an hour later?”
“No, I—”
“You think I hunted down the douche who crowbarred your last boyfriend’s face because I wanted to dump you?”
I clenched my fists and shook them. I was so pent up. So annoyed with him and ashamed of myself that I couldn’t even speak. Because goddamn if he didn’t make perfect sense. And he’d never said or indicated that he didn’t want me around. All he’d done was make a decision about his own life so I’d fit into it. And I’d yelled at him.
“Look,” he continued, “I’m not going to feel right about taking you as my principal if all I want to do is get my hands on you. You’re too distracting. I’m not going to do either job right if I try to do both. So I made a choice. It’s not a big deal. Carlos said I could do it if Darlene said it was all right, and Darlene wanted to make sure you didn’t feel pressured, so she told you instead of me.”
I felt a tickle on my ankles and a soft vibration. We both looked down. The gray cat twisted between my legs.
“She likes you.” He picked up my chin with two fingers, making me look into his ocean eyes. “So do I.”
“I shouldn’t have gotten mad about you switching without talking to you first.”
“It’s okay.”
“But about you going after Vince?” He dropped his hand, but my head stayed high. “That was stupid.”
“Thanks, Mom.” He scooped up the cat, softening with the presence of the purring animal. “Now open up before Mrs. Grey starves.”
“Mrs. Grey?”
“Good a name as any.”
I ran my finger along the soft fur of her head. She purred. When he petted her with me, it felt as if we’d decided something.
“She looks too young to be married.”
“It’s easier to say than Miss Grey.”
“Just Grey, then?”
He picked her up and held her high. Her legs stiffened, and her claws came out.
“How’s that work for you?” Carter asked the cat. She made a noise that wasn’t quite a meow, clearly stating she wanted to be put down immediately. “I’ll take that as a yes.”
I opened the door, and Carter put the cat on the ground. When we were both in, I turned and found Grey sitting on the step with her tail flicking.
“Are you coming in?” I asked.
She meowed with force, as if I were a stupid woman asking a stupid question.
“She’s hungry, and she eats in the backyard,” Carter said, on the way to the kitchen already. “Coming inside has nothing to do with eating.”
It felt weird closing the door on the cat, but I did. As soon as it was shut, she scampered over the fence that led to the back. Carter had been right. He knew cats, or maybe he just understood how animals, including people, behaved.
When I got to the kitchen, the bowl was full, and he was already sealing the bag of Meow Mix. I took the bowl to the back door and peeked out. Grey was waiting outside my bedroom, where I’d come out the last time she was fed. She was going to have to get a new habit. I wasn’t walking through my bedroom every time.
I put the bowl down, and she hustled over.
“You’re welcome,” I said as she ate.
I caught the scent of Carter before I felt his fingertip on the back of my neck. The pressure woke my sleeping skin, like the first move of a dance across still air. I let my eyes close.
“You’re my principal for the rest of the day,” he said into my ear.
“And then?”
“Then I’m going to take off your clothes and kiss every inch of your body.”
I sucked in a breath. Closed my eyes. A tremor of arousal went down my spine. I bent a little from the shock of it.
I tried to turn, but his arms went around me.
“I want to do stupid things when I’m around you.”
“How stupid?” My voice broke.
“I want to make you come.”
His fingertip slid under my waistband. His lips brushed my neck. My body went wild. Every drop of blood and fluid, every zap of electricity, was immediately rerouted to the space between my legs. The conduit that ran from brain to mouth was rerouted. I couldn’t say the word yes, but my hips thrust forward, pushing his hand another half an inch past the edge of my waistband.
“I thought you couldn’t. I thought as long as I was your principal . . .”
“I know. I can’t. And I can’t stop wanting you either. Do you want to come?”
Such a simple question, and such an array of answers.
Yes, I wanted to come. But I was just over being angry with him, and it seemed as if there were too many unanswered questions. I wanted to have a date, dinner, a little cuddling in front of a movie before I gave him my orgasm.
But his hand was so warm, and my muscles under it twitched and shuddered.
I nodded before my brain could engage my throat to make an answer.
His hand slid down my triangle and between my legs, pushing me against him. He was hard against my bottom, grinding against me as his fingers found where I was wet.
“Yes,” he said with deep satisfaction, sliding his other hand up my shirt to find my hardened nipple. “You’re so ready.”
He drew two fingers across my clit, holding me in the vise of his arms.
“Yes,” was the only word in my vocabulary.
He gently swirled my clit in my juices, gathering warmth, circling the pleasure to a central spot at the tip. My hips jerked with him, and he held me so tight I felt as safe as I’d ever felt.
“I knew you were this hot,” he said into my ear. “I can’t wait to get my dick in you. I’m going to fuck you blind.”
I answered with a series of short breaths. I was on my tiptoes, bent like a letter of the alphabet, muscles taut and ready for release.