I choked and coughed. “What?”
“I don’t know if she was just saying that because she didn’t like him, or if she’d turn any of us away if we tried to do the same thing.”
I sighed. “I’m worried. If Sean’s not good enough for even Marie, is she going to start bringing strangers here to date her...or me?”
“We’ll get you both out.” He brought my hands to his lips and kissed the knuckles. “princess, hang in there.”
I wanted to stay with him, but I had to get everything settled downstairs so I could come back to him. “I’ve got to go clean up,” I said quickly. “I need to wash dishes.”
“Come back when you can,” he said.
“Hide in the back,” I said. “Just in case Jimmy comes up here before me. More than likely he will.”
“I promise,” he said. He bent forward and kissed me again on the lips. Long. Slow. Soft.
I closed my eyes, wishing I could stay. The whole dinner and charade had knocked the confidence out of me.
He released me and helped me gather some pajamas.
I left him to go to the bathroom. I stood at the sink, staring at the makeup for a minute.
Not me.
Not what I wanted.
I wished I could be strong like Mr. Blackbourne and the others wanted me to be.
This was getting so hard. I wasn’t myself anymore.
I turned on the sink, letting the water run over my hands, and scrubbed my face. I took a little time, needing to calm down. My nerves had my body shaking.
It could have been so much worse. I had to remember that.
Once I was finished, I went downstairs quickly.
Jimmy was at the sink alone. From what I could hear, Carol was in the laundry room.
Jimmy scraped the dishes free of food and used the scrub brush to soap them. The goop in his hair had dried enough to make the tight curls of his hair shine. He looked up at me as I came closer. His dark eyes softened.
“I can take over,” I said quietly.
He smiled, small and sympathetic. He held a soapy dish out to me. “Rinse and put in the dishwasher?” he said in a quieter tone. “I’ll help.”
My lips trembled, finding some solace in him, despite his mother. Silently, he shared how he was sorry for what happened.
It was hard to dislike him.
I would have said I’d do the dishes alone to be nice, but it kept him from poking around and discovering Victor.
I took the dish from him and used the sprayer to rinse it.
At first, we worked quietly. The smell of dinner that evening was washed away with the soap we used. I appreciated the quiet moment.
If I was normal, I would almost like this. He was very nice.
He handed me one of the dinner plates, and it was slippery. It was one of the nice dishes Carol had brought, so I was trying to be extra careful. I held on carefully, until an uncontrollable shivering took over me the instant he let go.
It seemed to jump from my hand.
Time slowed for me, and it landed in the sink with a clatter. Too loud for anyone in the house to ignore.
Sounding a lot like it had broken.
My heart exploded in shock, sure that I’d damaged it. Would Carol be upset? What would she do?
“What happened in there?” she called from the laundry room. “Everything okay?”
Jimmy reached in before I could, picking up the plate.
My heart pounded, afraid of even a crack.
Jimmy flipped it over in his hands and found one small chip along the edge. The piece fell into the sink.
My eyes widened. I shook my head reflexively. There was no way to hide it. It was pretty obvious.
Carol appeared in the door. Her makeup had been removed, but she still wore the clothes she had at dinner. She first looked at Jimmy. “I thought I said you should change once Sang...” She paused, and then her eyes went to the plate. She frowned, clearly displeased. “Did it break?”
My heart was a little too fast, and my breath caught in my throat. If Carol was controlling when she was normal, what happened when she was angry?
“Sorry,” Jimmy said before I even had a chance. He scooped the chip out and held it between his fingers. “I dropped it. There’s a chip, but I think I can fix it.”
I held my breath, unsure if I liked him taking the blame.
Carol came over, inspecting the plate. She shook her head. “No, this is broken.” She took it from his hands, taking it to the trash can.
“But I can fix it,” Jimmy said, his voice going a pitch higher than before. “It just needs a little super glue.”
“It will never be the same. We get rid of broken things in this house.” She tossed it into the trash can hard enough that the plate shattered even more.
The suddenness had me push my back into the sink. I stilled, afraid to move. The intensity, the severity in which she dealt with it rattled me.
She glanced at Jimmy and at me. “Once a thing is broken, cracked, the structure becomes unstable. It’s only a matter of time before it will completely crumble. Best to get rid of it quickly and find something new.”
“Not everything is like that,” Jimmy said.
“It’s a good lesson to learn early on.” She looked right at me then. “I know you probably had a crush on your Sean Green, but I believe you can do better for yourself. Unstable foundations make for disappointment later.”
Jimmy shot a quick glance at me and then looked down at the tiles, lips tight.
I didn’t know what to say. What about Sean did she disapprove of?
Who could possibly be better?
And what did that say about me? Did she believe me unstable? Did she look for ways to throw me away?
When nothing was said, she waved her hands at the dishes in the sink. “Take care of the rest. I may be able to get a replacement. If not, we’ll get a new set.” She left the room, going into the laundry room again.
I stood still, my heart beating so frantically that I heard my pulse in my ears.
It didn’t hit me until that moment that she was scarier than I’d realized. She made you comfortable, made you feel like you were on her side, but only if you did what she said. She didn’t ask you what you wanted. She told people what to do. That was how she operated.
Should I have been surprised that she was odd? She moved into a complete stranger’s house, where she could direct Marie and myself to do what she wanted.
Jimmy’s face was red around his cheeks. He turned to the sink, staring at the dishes.
He had taken the blame for me.
He made an effort to be nice. To protect me from his mother, so she wouldn’t disapprove.
It wasn’t the first time he had come to my aid.
He knew something I didn’t about her. He was protecting me.
I turned the running water back on, quietly standing beside him.
He looked up at me, his eyes dark.
I tried to smile. I had no idea what growing up with Carol was like. However, he’d been uprooted to come here. Alone and uncomfortable. He was trying to make the best of it. Maybe Jimmy needed as much help as I did.