“Do you want to talk?” she asked.
“I don't know. I'm just numb.” He looked at the woman who'd been his PA for the last fifteen years. He was glad he'd chosen a more mature lady to look after him. She'd been a wonderful PA. He remembered back to when he'd just started his business, how many beautiful women had applied for the post he'd advertised. But despite being turned on to no end by the miniskirts, long legs, and low-cut tops, he had stayed focused and chosen someone purely on merit. Megan was fifty-six and marvelously efficient. “I couldn’t have done all this without you, Megan,” he said.
“Nonsense. You've done it all yourself.”
“Not bad for a kid from the wrong end of town,” he said, referencing his upbringing in a squalid apartment in Brownsville, NY.
“Not bad at all,” she said. “But I think it's not despite your background; it's because of it.”
“What do you mean?”
“You know how you got to the top. You had to kick ass and push people around. You had to bend the rules, break a few bones, and never take no for an answer. A boy from middle-class America who'd been to private school and then Harvard wouldn't have been able to do that. And do you know what the best part of it is?” she asked.
“No.”
“You're still only thirty-two. I'm so sorry about Lindsey, and I know it will take you a long time to get over it, but you're still so young.”
“It doesn't feel that way at the moment,” Aaron said.
“Of course not. I didn’t want to demean Lindsey's memory in any way. I just wanted to say that time is a great healer.”
“I guess. Will you call the undertaker and make the funeral arrangements? I don't think I can.”
“Sure.”
“You know what I want. We've discussed it often enough.”
*****
Aaron had asked people not to wear black. Black wasn't a color he associated with Lindsey, and although it wasn’t tradition, he wanted people to wear bright colors. He wanted her funeral to be a celebration of her life. It was impossible for it to be a joyous occasion, but he wanted to give thanks to Lindsey for what she had given to the world: her charm, intelligence, beauty, and the most wonderful gift of all, Matthew.
He looked at his five-year-old son playing with some building blocks in the corner of his playroom and wondered how he would react when he saw his mom's coffin. Aaron had agonized about letting Matthew go to the funeral, but he'd read an article about a woman who hadn't been allowed to go to her father's funeral, and she'd said it had deprived her of the ability to mourn. So he'd decided to let Matthew come and try and explain what was happening.
He remembered the day the doctors had told him and Lindsey that Matthew was autistic. They hadn't noticed at first, but when he was about two, they began to see some suspicious behavior. He never made eye contact, and when they smiled at him, his face would remain blank. He was generally so unlike other kids that Lindsey had persuaded Aaron to come with her to the doctors. They hadn't known what to think at first. The more they read about the condition, the more confused they became. But they had spoken to some other parents with autistic kids, and there seemed to be three things that were vitally important to the child's welfare. They gave Matthew his own secure area, they held to a strict schedule, and they rewarded him greatly for good behavior.
“Hey, little man, are you ready?” he asked.
Matthew looked at him and stood up. “Mommy?” he asked.
“Yes, Mommy,” Aaron replied.
The funeral cortege soon got to the church, which was close to Aaron's home. When Aaron got out of the limousine, holding Matthew's hand, women began to wail. Not because they had known Lindsey particularly well, but because the sight of such a handsome man holding the hand of such a cute boy at his mother's funeral was too much to stomach.
After the funeral, Aaron did the usual thing and thanked everyone. He had no idea how it had affected Matthew, because he'd shown no emotion at all. He hadn't even made any of his customary noises. Aaron assumed he would find out in the fullness of time.
“Thank you, Pastor Evans. It was a wonderful service,” Aaron said as he shook his hand.
“You take care, Aaron. I'll be along to see you at regular intervals, and if there's anything you need, please let me know.”
“I will,” Aaron replied. “You're coming to the house for refreshments, aren't you?” he asked.
“Yes. Thank you. I'll just say good-bye to the mourners and then I'll be there.”
The house was full of well-wishers who'd come to Aaron's mansion to have a drink and something to eat. Matthew sat quietly in the comer and observed what was going on around him.
“Aaron, I heard Matthew's nanny has handed in her notice,” Pastor Evan's wife said.