Crap, I hated my boyfriend.
After the most awkward dinner ever, I helped Grayson change the sheets on his bed. “I’m so sorry about this,” he said after we fluffed the comforter.
“Don’t be.”
“I’ll tell her tonight,” he said, taking both my hands in his.
“Well, that might ruin your chances of keeping her.” The joke fell flat.
“I want you,” he promised.
I didn’t doubt that, but it wasn’t just about wanting me.
“There’s no part of you that wants her? Because watching you two, I can’t believe that’s true. And I’m not mad. Jealous, maybe…okay, definitely, but I get it.” Please tell me now before I fall any harder. He’d loved her all his life, he said so, but never once had he uttered those words in regards to me.
“There’s no part of me that doesn’t want you,” he answered, tipping my chin toward his to kiss me gently. “Have a little faith, remember?”
“Seriously?” Parker hissed from the door and brought in two small suitcases. “What if I’d been Grace? Can’t you two just not…ugh.”
Grayson turned to face her. “First, this is my house, and we’re not in North Carolina. You want to invade my life, fine, but you’re not going to tell me how to live it. Second, Grace can’t walk up the stairs. Third, so what? She deserves to know that I’m with Sam. I’m not lying to her, not so you can live out this insane fantasy.”
Parker blanched. “You can’t tell her. We don’t know what her health will do. She’s so fragile, Gray, and you’re what she’s holding on to. You can’t abandon her.”
“She’s smart enough to know that things change in five years, and she’s strong enough to adapt.”
“And what if she’s not? You haven’t been around, as usual. You haven’t seen how hard this is on her, knowing everyone kept living while she…didn’t. If you tell her that you moved on, that there’s no chance for the two of you to be together, you will be the tipping point for her.”
“Parker, that’s not fair,” I said, “and you don’t get to come in here and lay blame on Grayson for something that was never his fault. This is our home.”
She side-eyed me, and got up in Grayson’s face. “You owe her this much. You knew how drunk Owen was. You knew the minute he threw that punch when you asked for his keys. What did you do? Told him to ‘fuck off’ and walked away. You owe Grace at least enough time to get on her feet before you shred her.”
I placed my hand between his shoulder blades, wishing I could take the sting out of her words, or just plain shut her up. It took everything in my willpower to bite my tongue and remember that this was Grayson’s sister. “She’s wrong, Grayson. It wasn’t your fault.”
“It was,” he answered, not even turning around. “If I’d stood my ground, none of this would have happened.”
“Exactly,” Parker agreed. “If it had never happened, you’d be happy. Both of you.”
“That’s crossing the line.” Grayson’s voice dropped.
“Maybe. But I’m right. You know I’m right, too, don’t you, Sam?”
My stomach dropped like I’d gone off the rails on a high-speed roller coaster.
If none of it had happened, he would have gone to UNC with Grace. They’d have gotten married after graduation and made perfect, G-named babies and raised them on the beaches of the Outer Banks. But his perfect life had come unraveled.
Grayson would never absolve himself of the guilt, and Grace would always hold that string.
He would never be entirely mine.
“Don’t tell her.” My voice sounded flat, like it belonged to someone else.
Grayson spun around and took me by the shoulders. “What?”
“Parker’s right.” The words tasted like acid, but I had to lessen some of the guilt that was suffocating him. “You don’t know what it will do to her. Her doctors aren’t here. She’s eight hundred miles away from home, and you might very well break her heart. She doesn’t deserve that.”