“How you treat your spouse is who you are. He is a bad man. You deserve to be cared for, supported and loved. Not controlled, deceived and stifled. You know this,” Buck says.
Well, actually, she doesn’t, Buck. There is a reason I selected her. And Lois. And Gretchen. I know their kind. It was as if I was bred with an extrasensory perception of people I can control. Specifically, women I can control. I can smell them, feel them. I know it the minute we bump into each other, the ones I can get. Just as I may be a type, so are they, only they don’t know it. By the way, I don’t tell anyone these things, so please don’t say anything or share my secrets.
Buck’s also wrong about another thing. It’s not how you treat your spouse that shows people who you are. It’s how you treat yourself, how much you care about yourself. Mia became selfless with me. It’s her fault, not mine.
“Paul. Please. I know you are listening from the top of the stairs. We’re over. I need to give you these papers, you need to sign them, and then I need you to leave. Otherwise, I’ll call the police,” Mia says.
For obvious reasons, I don’t want the cops here. Although I’ve never made their acquaintance, and small-town, hick-filled police departments don’t concern me, I’d just rather not have that type of encounter tonight. You know, you start to get on the radar of a police department, even if it’s tiny Lakeside PD, and it could become an issue. Mia’s voice is firm, threatening. Tonight, at this moment, I don’t think she is bluffing.
I have no choice. I start walking back down the stairs. This situation is uncomfortable. Made doubly so by the pretty boy in the corner. Pretty boys have haunted me, always. I was just as handsome, mind you, just not equipped with the right stuff. They seemed to know I didn’t have the right pants to wear for sixth grade dance club, or the money for the best equipment for football in seventh grade. My mom was different than the other mom volunteers, less put together, always nervous, inferior. My family was a step down from the rest of the families in my friend group. I was the poor boy. Even though my parents bragged about making the move to Grandville, buying their first home in what they thought was the best suburb in town when it wasn’t back then, I was acutely aware that we lived in the cheapest house in the neighborhood. I knew we were barely hanging on. With every beating I repeated to myself: I will never be the poor boy again. Never.
I feel my hands clench by my sides. I work to open them by the time I reach the bottom of the stairs. I stretch a smile across my perfect white veneers.
12:15 a.m.
24
Buck looks at me from a position of strength, preening like he’s a rooster winning the cockfight. He’s a fool. Doesn’t he know all the animals die in those games? He has resumed his position standing between me and my wife. I can’t believe both of them, wearing their stupid matching Lakeside tourist sweatshirts. Did they plan that, too?
“Paul, sit down,” he says. He points to the spot on the couch. I defy him, a little victory, and sit down in the closest blue club chair. I’m tired. And bored with them. I yawn.
“Are we boring you, Paul?” he asks.
“Cocky asshole, yes, you are,” I say.
Mia steps forward, closer to me. She’s back. I think I’ve won her back. I smile my most winning smile and feel her being drawn toward me. I’m a magnet. I can almost reach out and touch her arm as she points to the documents on the table. Her red, blotchy, tear-streaked face is hideous in the candlelight. But I still love her, poor thing.
“Paul. Here is the separation agreement. I need you to sign it, and then leave and go to the hotel room I reserved for you at the Lakeside Inn. All of your belongings have been taken there already,” Mia says. Her voice is quiet, shaky. I think maybe Buck has talked her into this whole ridiculous exercise. When I get her alone again, I’ll smooth everything over. She stands and backs away, stopping next to Buck. From there she adds, “Except I kept a couple of things you won’t be needing.”
How dare she rummage through my things? When did she even have the time? When I was at the store purchasing items for her, from her grocery list just to make her happy? Bitch. But still, there is nothing of note hidden in my belongings, I’m sure. A little folder about the Texas land, that’s all. I wonder again what else she knows, what is making her take this step.
“Mia, you surprise me. You’ve turned sneaky. Conniving. A planner. Everything you hate in the world. Bravo,” I say, raising an invisible glass in a mock salute. “I’ve taught you well.”
Mia shakes her head. I’m unsure what to do next. Has she gone through my briefcase? What does she have? For a moment my heart thuds in my chest as I remember the special envelope. I think back to the sink fire, relieved.
Mia walks back toward the table, coming closer to me, holding a pen. “You will keep the home in Columbus as your primary residence since it was yours when we married. The cottage will be mine. You’ll see I’ve been more than fair, about everything.”
I wonder how many of her daddy’s expensive New York City attorneys billed time against this document. It doesn’t matter, really. I know it will be airtight, unbreakable. I am signing the end to this gravy train.
If I sign.
I pretend Buck is not in the room, and address only Mia. “Look, honey, it’s late. We’re all tired, a little worked up. Why don’t I go on over to the inn and we can look these things over in the morning? How’s that?” I ask.
Mia looks at Buck, Buck stares at me.
He says, “No. That doesn’t work. We need this signed tonight. I don’t trust you to come back over. I don’t believe anything you say.”
“Who are you anyway, and why are you here?” I ask for the umpteenth time tonight, standing once more. Mia jumps back and hides behind Buck. The fire in my soul is starting to burn. “I want you out of my house now. This is between my wife and me.”
“Paul, calm down,” Mia says. She has stepped toward me again. Buck stops her, placing a hand on her shoulder. She turns and looks up at him. She’s a traitor.
“May I?” he asks her.
Mia looks at him like a lost puppy dog and nods a silent yes. Clearly my mutt needs a little retraining.
It’s Buck’s turn to take a step toward me, putting himself between Mia and me, his favorite position tonight. “Sit back down and I’ll tell you everything. And then you will sign, and you will leave. You can even go back to Columbus tonight, if that’s your preference.”