‘He was the one who pushed you down the stairs, not Jack.’
A frown furrowed her brow. ‘Not Jack?’
‘No, not Jack. You like Jack, Millie, you like Jack very much.’ I gave her a little shake. ‘It’s very important that you like Jack. He didn’t push you down the stairs, George Clooney did. Do you understand? You have to like Jack, Millie, for me.’
She looked at me closely. ‘You scared.’
‘Yes, Millie, I’m scared. So please, tell me that you like Jack. It’s very important.’
‘I like Jack,’ she said obediently.
‘Good, Millie.’
‘But don’t like Jorj Koony.’
‘No, you don’t, you don’t like George Clooney at all.’
‘He bad, he push me down the stairs.’
‘Yes, he did. But you don’t have to tell people that. You mustn’t tell people that George Clooney pushed you down the stairs. That’s a secret, like Rosie. But you must tell people that you like Jack. That’s not a secret. And you must tell Jack that you like him. Do you understand?’
‘I understand.’ She nodded. ‘Must tell Jack like him.’
‘Yes.’
‘I tell him I not like Jorj Koony?’
‘Yes, you can tell him that too.’
She leant in closer to me. ‘But Jack Jorj Koony, Jorj Koony Jack,’ she whispered.
‘Yes, Millie, Jack is George Clooney but only we know that,’ I whispered back. ‘Do you see what I mean? It’s a secret, our secret, like Rosie.’
‘Jack bad man, Grace.’
‘Yes, Jack bad man. But that’s our secret too. You mustn’t tell anyone.’
‘I not live with him. I scared.’
‘I know.’
‘So what you do?’
‘I’m not sure yet, but I’ll find a solution.’
‘Promise?’
‘Promise.’
She looked closely at me. ‘Grace sad.’
‘Yes, Grace sad.’
‘Don’t worry, Millie here. Millie help Grace.’
‘Thank you,’ I said, hugging her. ‘Remember, Millie, you like Jack.’
‘I not forget.’
‘And you mustn’t say you don’t want to live with him.’
‘Won’t.’
‘Good, Millie.’
Outside, we found Jack waiting impatiently for us.
‘Why were you so long?’ he asked, giving me a long look.
‘I have period,’ said Millie importantly. ‘Need long time for period.’
‘Shall we go for a walk before we go back?’
‘Yes, I like walk.’
‘Maybe we can find an ice cream along the way.’
Remembering what I told her, she beamed at him. ‘Thank you, Jack.’
‘Well, she seems to have recovered some of her good humour,’ Jack remarked, as Millie skipped along in front of us.
‘When we were in the toilets, I explained that now that we are married, it is normal that you are always with me, and she’s understood that she has to share me with you.’
‘As long as that was all you said.’
‘Of course it was.’
Janice was waiting when we dropped her off at school an hour later. ‘You look as if you’ve had a nice time, Millie,’ she smiled.
‘Have,’ Millie agreed. She turned to Jack. ‘I like you, Jack, you nice.’
‘I’m glad you think so,’ he nodded, looking over at Janice.
‘But don’t like Jorj Koony.’
‘That’s fine by me,’ he told her. ‘I don’t like him either.’
And Millie had howled with laughter.
PRESENT
We’re going to Esther and Rufus’s tonight, and to see Millie tomorrow. I know for certain that we’re going because Janice took the liberty of phoning yesterday to check with Jack that we were. It seems she has a family lunch that she can’t miss and there is nobody to look after Millie if we don’t go, but, as we haven’t been for three weeks, I can’t help thinking it’s an excuse. Privately, I think she’s getting a little fed up of us not turning up to take Millie out, something I’m surprised Jack isn’t more careful about. At the expense of punishing me, he’s risking Janice questioning our commitment to Millie. But, as that can only be in my favour, I’m hardly going to point it out to him.
Maybe it’s because I know I’ll be seeing Millie tomorrow that I feel less stressed than usual about going out tonight. Dinners at friends’ are the equivalent of walking through a minefield for me as I’m always worried about doing or saying something Jack will use against me. I’m pleased that I didn’t fall into the trap he set me by shading the words in Esther’s book, although I’ll have to be careful that I don’t say anything to her that he could misconstrue.