I hadn’t realized when my new cut had come up conveniently missing that they were merging it with my old one, but I could see the detail now that had been unique to each individual piece.
The gold buckles of my old cut, paired with the snap buttons of my new. My old patches mingled with my new ones. The two rockers declaring me a member of both chapters. God, I fucking loved everything about it.
“You’re a member of both of our chapters. There’s not going to be any bitching or questions asked. You just are and you always will be.”
With that, he gestured for me to settle my vest where it belonged.
Right over my shoulders, covering my back.
***
I felt her watching me, and I knew that the time had come to finally approach her.
I’d apologized the moment I saw her the first time after she found out I was not really dead.
She hadn’t accepted the apology.
I didn’t blame her.
I’d damaged something between us, and until that damage was healed, her husband wouldn’t accept my apology either.
Sure, he was happy that I was okay and had even been cordial, but it was the betrayal against his wife that he hadn’t been able to forgive.
I’d made her suffer, and he would never forgive me for that.
All this time, she’d thought she’d been responsible for my death, and I’d never corrected her assumptions. So in all actuality, I really did deserve her anger. She’d lived with those feelings of guilt and remorse for years.
I hitched Gianna up onto my shoulder.
I’d been holding her all night.
She was definitely a daddy’s girl, just like her sister, and hated everyone and everything unless she was sleeping, like she’d been doing for the majority of the day.
Moving to the shadows where she stood, I stopped just short of touching distance and said, “I’m sorry.”
This time, though, instead of looking away from me like she usually did, she stared straight at me and then burst out crying.
Then she threw her arms around me and cried into my chest.
I wrapped my free hand around Rue’s shoulders and pulled her in tight, dropping my chin down on top of her head and closing my eyes.
“I’m so glad you’re okay,” she said in between sobs. “I’m sorry I’ve been such a bitch these last few months. I was just so angry and hurt.”
I made a humming noise under my breath. “You had every reason to be angry. You have to know that I didn’t have a choice in the fake death at first, but I did have a hand in the way I allowed it to play out. I’ll never forgive myself for allowing you to think I was dead for so long and causing you to carry around the guilt that I know you felt.”
She sniffled loudly.
“Your baby smells good.”
I laughed, causing her head to bounce on my chest.
“You want to hold her?”
“In a minute.”
So I continued to hold Rue, allowing her to compose herself for another few minutes before she pulled away and wiped her eyes with the back of her hand.
“I’m glad you’re home, Tunnel.”
I pushed Rue’s hair back away from her face, then pulled her in for a kiss on her forehead. “I’m glad to be home, Rue.”
“Not that I don’t think this needed to happen,” Cleo said, interrupting us. “But don’t put your lips on my wife again.”
I grinned and pulled her into my arm, and she wrapped her arm back around me tightly.
“Oh, Cleo,” I teased. “I can’t help it if your wife likes me better than you.”
Cleo snorted.
“You just keep telling yourself that.”
Laughing, Rue pulled away and then took the baby from my arms before she walked away.
Cleo waited for another minute, making sure that Rue was far enough away, before he turned to me.
“You ever hurt her again like that—either of them—and I’ll fucking kill you myself.”
I sobered.
“Good to know.”
He offered me his hand, and I took it, keeping my eyes on his as I did it.
“I’m glad you’re home, too,” Cleo said, squeezing my hand tighter.
I squeezed his back.
“Me too.”
***
“You let your daughter take that to sleep?” Mina whispered from the doorway.
I looked up to find her standing with one shoulder leaning against the wall just inside the door.
“It was the only way she’d stay asleep. I’ve been trying for over an hour now to get her to sleep,” I said.
Her smile was soft as I watched my girl hang on to the t-shirt I’d been wearing up until I’d somehow maneuvered her, and my shirt, off to get her into bed.
“Well, hurry up. Let’s not wake her up with our talking.”
She turned to go, and I walked up behind her and scooped her up into my arms.
“You check on our other girl?” I asked.
She nodded.
“I did,” she said. “I walked in, and she was asleep like usual—with one arm and one leg hanging off the bed.”
I grinned.
That was how I slept, too.
It wasn’t because the bed was too small, either, it was just how I, and obviously now Sienna, slept.
“So we have two sleeping children?” I clarified as I passed through our bedroom door and kicked it closed.
Mina caught it before it could slam, closing it quietly from her perch in the protection of my arms.
“We do,” Mina confirmed. “Now what are you going to do about it?”
I groaned. “We can’t do anything.”
She sighed and threw her head back to look at me. “We didn’t follow the six-week rule with Sienna, why are we doing it now?”
I pushed her back onto the bed and followed her down.
“Because with Sienna, we were young and stupid and had no idea of the consequences of having sex before you were fully healed. Now, you’re a nurse, and we know better.”
She grunted.
“I have to go back to work in six weeks. Do you think Tommy will give me another two weeks off?”
She rolled over onto her side, and I pulled her in close to me, dropping a kiss on her forehead.
“Yeah,” I said. “But you told me just yesterday that you were ready to go back.”
She grimaced. “That was when they had a busy day, and it was a moment of weakness.”
I grunted in amusement.
“Have we decided what we’re going to do with Gianna yet?” I questioned.
“Actually,” she said. “I do have an idea about that.”
“What?” I pushed.
“I was thinking that, since we have a lot of kids here, all under the age of four, that we could see if everyone wanted to hire a full-time nanny who would watch them all day while everyone was at work. That way no one has to take their kids to a daycare,” she started. “But I don’t know how to broach the subject with the others.”
“Just ask Tally,” I said. “Or Imogen. Or…”
She started to laugh. “I know, I know.”
Grinning, I reached over to the lamp and plunged the room into darkness.
“We better go to bed now, or we’re going to hate ourselves in an hour when she wakes up.”
Mina yawned. “You aren’t kidding.”
With that, Mina shifted again, this time underneath the covers, and then rolled until her face was resting on my bicep.
I slowly stroked her hair, thankful that she was growing it out again for me, and wasn’t surprised when she fell asleep within a few minutes.
That was normal for an exhausted woman who had an infant and an active eight-year-old, though.