Yes, I was addicted to leggings.
“Yeah,” I agreed. “I didn’t think they’d be all that cute either, to be honest. I originally ordered these for a friend for her birthday, but when I saw them after I got them, I couldn’t give them away like I’d originally intended. This is one of my favorite pairs.”
She nodded. “I tried to wear leggings out of the house once, and my husband told me I needed to go change. I’d love to have some, but they wouldn’t be practical.”
“That’s a good thing, Elle,” Jessie offered his two cents, not bothering to act like he wasn’t listening to our conversation any longer. “Because I’d seriously have to spank your ass, and those leggings wouldn’t offer much in the way of protection.”
I grinned. He was, of course, correct.
“I don’t have a husband to tell me no.”
I heard something crunch behind me, and saw that Ghost was standing there, next to the food table, holding a beer can in his hand that he’d somehow crushed.
I looked up to see his eyes, but was caught with the glare of the glasses covering them.
He stared, but that gaze was too intense for me, so I looked away.
And I felt him there, for at least twenty minutes, while he spoke quietly to another member of the club, this man was huge and bulky with kind eyes and had been introduced to me earlier as Sunshine…or something similar to that.
I felt like my skin was about to burst into flames.
“Can you give me a drink, Mister?”
I turned at the sound of my child’s voice, and I saw that she was standing in front of Ghost, pointing to a pitcher of tea.
Normally, she would’ve just gotten it herself, but the pitcher was completely filled to the brim, and she didn’t have the arm strength yet to lift it up and hold it without spilling.
“Yeah, Sugar Girl. I can get you a drink,” Ghost said, picking up the pitcher as easily as he would lift his own hand. “You got a cup?”
My entire body locked.
Sugar Girl.
It could’ve been a coincidence. Sure, it could. It had to be.
No one else would know to call her that but my husband. It had to be a coincidence!
Memories of the first day that Tunnel called our child ‘Sugar Girl’ assaulted me.
“Go give Daddy a kiss, baby,” I patted my daughter’s diapered bottom.
She toddled over to her daddy, who was in his chair in front of the TV, still in his police uniform, and tried to pull herself up.
Automatically, Tunnel hooked an arm under her diaper-clad butt and pulled her into the chair.
She did the rest of the work and scrambled up his chest to get to his face.
Then she started laying kisses on his face. Except they weren’t normal kisses. They were open-mouthed kisses with lots of slobber and a little bit of tongue.
“Ohh, thank you, Sugar Girl.” Tunnel said laughingly. “I love you, too.”
Sienna gave him a gummy smile, her lone white tooth glinting along the bottom of her mouth, and then fell face forward into his chest.
And, just like she always did, she was out like a light a few seconds later.
“I wish I had your superpowers,” I murmured.
He grinned, then lifted his forearm to wipe the drool from his face.
“One day you’ll be her everything, baby. So, right now, just let me enjoy our Sugar Girl.”
He had no clue how right he was. He’d enjoyed the best of Sienna’s baby years and had died right before she’d turned two.
A lump formed in my throat at those thoughts.
My husband had a name problem. He never once called any of us by the same name. Sometimes he would cycle through about four names. For our daughter it was Sienna, Dee, a shortened version of her middle name, Sugar Girl, or See. For me, it was Mina, Minnie, Philly, a shortened version of my actual name, Philomina, or Min. I never knew what would come out of my husband’s mouth, so we really had to be ready to answer to any of them.
“You okay, girl?” Ellen asked.
I nodded.
“Would you like to meet the rest of the girl squad?” she asked. “They’re all in the family room, or they would’ve been out here to greet you by now.”
No, no I did not. Because doing that would require my leaving this spot, and I liked this spot. The man, Ghost, was like a wall of fire at my back. Even though he wasn’t touching me, I could feel his heat practically seeping into me.
“How’s work going for you?” I heard asked behind me.
“Good and bad,” came Ghost’s reply.
I froze at that raspy voice.
“Mina?”
I was frozen in between leaving and staying, and I couldn’t get my feet to move.
I turned to look over my shoulder at the man at my back and was unsurprised to find his eyes on me.
What was it about this man that made me act like this?
Ellen touched my arm, and the connection between us was severed.
I took a step away from Ghost. Then another, and another, until I was all the way across the room.
“Where to?” I asked breathlessly.
***
Ghost
I watched her go, feeling like a piece of my heart was walking away from me.
“You’re going to either have her back in a matter of days, or you’re going to have her so mad at you that everyone within a two-mile radius will hear everything that has ever happened between the two of y’all when she starts screaming it at you because she’s so pissed off at you,” Sean pointed out helpfully.
I turned my glare to him.
My heart wasn’t beating right. It felt like it was skipping way too many beats to be considered safe.
“I don’t want to talk about it,” I told him.
Sean grinned.
“So, Sugar Girl?” Sean teased.
I blew out a breath.
“Did you see her freeze when you said that to her daughter?” Sean continued.
I gritted my teeth.
“And your daughter. Man, she’s fuckin’ adorable. She looks just like you,” Sean continued. “Those eyes.”
Yeah, those eyes. Those were all mine.
I was happy that her eyes had stayed green.
“How long is this going to go on before you make a move?” Sean asked, this time really expecting an answer.
I shrugged. “I don’t know. I never planned to do anything, but it’s getting harder and harder to stay away.”
My gaze turned to zero in on my daughter, who was standing across the room staring at the other kids. She was standing off to the side, silently taking everything in, and I realized that my eye color wasn’t the only thing she’d gotten.
She was watchful and observant like me, too.
Chapter 14
If you don’t have anything nice to say, say it anyway. Sometimes motherfuckers need to hear the truth.
-Ghost’s secret thoughts
Ghost
Day five of Mina and Sienna being in Mooresville I watched her live in my house, and I knew that this would have to be taken care of quickly. I couldn’t keep doing this. I couldn’t watch her cry in my bed. Couldn’t watch her walking around looking so lost and sad. Couldn’t stay away from her another minute when all I wanted to do was wrap my arms around her and never, ever let her go.
“You know, one of these days, she’s going to find you standing out here.”
I grunted.