I went to the couch, Sutton lumbering after me. Seeing Lacey had felt amazing, but once I was away from her, all my vague restlessness rushed right back. I needed to stare at the ceiling and think for a while. Or maybe I was already overthinking. Maybe what I really needed right now was some mindless TV.
But just as I sat down, the front door’s lock clicked. Daniella swept in with a heavy sigh.
“Ugh, work was fucking awful today.” She untied her tennis shoes and tossed them into the entry closet. “Two nurses called in sick, and some jack-off yelled at me because he had to wait for two hours in the ER. Dude, the candlestick up your ass ain’t going nowhere. Let’s deal with the gunshot wounds and heart attacks first.”
“Wow, that sucks,” I replied in a monotone.
If Daniella noticed my distracted state, she didn’t care. Her tired smile turned hungry as she walked around the couch. “It did really suck. Fortunately, I know a great way to unwind,” she purred.
She leaned over to rub my shoulders, pressing the back of my head into her cleavage. Her hair tickled my neck, and I irritably brushed it aside like a mosquito.
Even an idiot could tell what Daniella was waiting for. She wanted me to get up, grab her arm, drag her into her bedroom, tie her up, spank her ass raw, and fuck her until she screamed. But the thought just didn’t appeal right now. Even though I could feel her nipples through her shirt, piercings and all, my cock resolutely stayed limp.
“I don’t know,” I finally said. I don’t know anything.
All of a sudden, I felt very tired. I’d taken that Oklahoma City job to clear my head, but half a week away from these two women hadn’t helped at all. Thoughts of Lacey had kept distracting me. In the middle of reviewing witness depositions or analyzing CCTV footage, I’d catch myself wondering what she was doing. Wishing I could spend time with her—not necessarily having sex, but definitely not in a “just friends” way, either. And then that weird moment in bed tonight . . . lying on our sides facing each other, staring into her hooded eyes as we came apart together.
“You don’t know? What does that mean?” Daniella’s hands paused on my shoulders. “Are you saying you’re not up for it?”
Shaking my head, I shrugged. “Sorry—”
“No, it’s okay,” she said, cutting me off as she stepped back. “How did your mission go?”
“I don’t do ‘missions’ anymore. But it went fine—no real hiccups.” Sutton bumped his head into my leg, grumbling for attention, and I reached down to scratch behind his ears.
When I didn’t elaborate, Daniella nodded in resigned acknowledgment. “Well, that’s always good to hear.” She paused for a moment before asking, “You’re still taking me to the Nurses’ Ball, right? It’s this Thursday.”
“Of course . . . I remember. My tux is at the cleaner’s, but I’ll be ready.” I always followed through on my commitments. Always.
She smiled, and I felt myself relax a bit. Seeing that smile was important to me. I’d nursed her back to health after a massive broken heart.
“Don’t freak out, but I had an idea,” I started. It was something that had been stewing in the back of my mind for the last few weeks, and I wanted to hear what she thought.
“What?” She raised one brow in curiosity.
“What if I took you back to the club?”
After her ex dumped her, Daniella had stopped visiting the local BDSM club they’d once frequented together. That disappearing act had hurt a lot of her friendships. It pissed me off to watch Daniella isolate herself like this. Her ex had been the asshole here, but she was the one being punished. Even two years later, she was still too afraid of running into him to go where she damn well pleased.
She frowned, taking a step back. “Why? Because you’re trading me in for Lacey?”
“What? No, of course not. It’s because you’re stronger now. I thought you might be ready to take that kind of step again.”
“I have no interest in that, Nolan. Being here with you is as close to perfect as I’ve ever had.”
With just those few simple words, she tugged on my heart. I really was her savior. “It was just a suggestion.”
Her hands came to rest on my hair. “I have everything I need right here. Are you sure you don’t want to . . .”
“Not tonight.” The words felt like acid on my tongue. Seriously, what the fuck is wrong with me?
She stepped back again and stretched hard, squeaking as her back popped. “Then I think I’m going to take a nap before dinner. Holler if you need anything.” She headed to her bedroom—obviously planning to spend some quality time with her vibrator.
But then she stopped in her tracks. “Nolan?”
“Yeah?” I turned my head to see her staring at me from halfway down the hall.
“Could she ever . . . change what we have?”
Her voice was so sad, her eyes so dark. Sympathy squeezed hard inside me.
“No. Never,” I heard myself say. “You know I’m never going to settle down with a wife and kids.” I smiled at her to tell her it was the absolute truth. “That’s not me, babe.”
She grinned back. “I know that. You’re like a wild horse. Roaming free, not meant to be tied down.”
“Exactly.”