Loved him? No, absolutely not. I was attracted to him, yeah. Who wouldn’t find him hot as hell? That thick curly hair that looked good tied up, those gorgeous green eyes, the cute dimples when he smiled and the deep husky voice that had the ability to make girls swoon, me included.
I didn’t want to consider it before, but it made sense now. I was scared to tell him I was over Chace because I didn’t want to fake break up and lose him from my life. I hated seeing him hurt—even just the thought of him getting hurt gutted me. Our personal contact had increased to the point where we were acting like a couple when no one could even see us. I would play with his hair, hold his hand, and grab his ass. He would keep an arm wrapped around me or trace his fingertips over my hips and stomach. He would press soft kisses to my shoulders, forehead, and the corner of my mouth. Our kisses were getting more frequent and intense, and we tended to get a little bit carried away sometimes. Like a few days ago in the kitchen at the roadhouse when Ryder finally cooked for me. It was easy to lose control around him when he made me feel so good. When he made me need him.
Holy crap! I liked Ryder. I did. I had feelings for Ryder Jones. Real, crazy feelings that I had never felt before. Was it love? No, I didn’t think so. But it was more than just physical attraction. I needed him in so many ways. What the hell was I supposed to do now?
“I need him.” I groaned. “It’s not love.” I shook my head slowly and looked at her. She looked like she was about to burst with excitement.
“Well, what are you doing sitting here with me? Go!” She began waving me away with both hands.
“What?” I wasn’t leaving her here to see Ryder. No way. What would I say to him? Did I even tell him the truth? No, that would be stupid. He’d just laugh in my face and either fake break up with me or make my life a living hell while we were still pretending to be in a relationship.
“You’ve just realised how much you like your super-hot boyfriend. You shouldn’t be here with me. You should make him understand how much he wants you too.”
“You’re crazy. We’re having a girls’ day. I can see Ryder tomorrow. So what are we doing now?”
“I am making you visit your gorgeous boyfriend.” She smiled and stood up, grabbing all of her bags and mine too.
“No, honestly. I will hang out with you. Ryder can wait.” I tried to argue with her, but it was useless.
“Bailey, your phone hasn’t stopped buzzing for the last ten minutes. He wants to see you, so go. Please. I’m all right. I’m kinda tired anyway, so an early night will be good for me.” I agreed reluctantly after I looked at my phone and saw ten new messages from Ryder all saying the same thing.
Ryder: Please.
He was begging me to visit him, and I had to admit that I wanted to see him too, but I was nervous about it.
I texted Ryder and asked for his address. Even though we’d been hanging out a lot, I’d never been to his house. After I dropped Indie home, I nervously made my way to Ryder’s house. By the time I got there, my heart was pounding out of my chest, and butterflies were erupting in my stomach. My hands shook as I knocked on the door and waited.
“Hello.” For some reason, I was surprised when a woman answered the door. She had long, wavy, brown hair and bright green eyes like Ryder. Ryder’s mother. I didn’t know why I expected him to be home alone. It just never occurred to me that he wouldn’t be.
“Ah, hi.” I smiled nervously at her, feeling uncomfortable showing up on a Friday night to see her son, but she didn’t seem to mind. Giving me a warm smile, she pulled the door open wider for me, gesturing for me to enter. Maybe Ryder brought girls home a lot and his mother was used to meeting them. That thought made my stomach churn.
“You must be Bailey, Ryder’s girlfriend. I’m Joan.” Girlfriend? Huh? Had he told his mother I was his girlfriend, or did she know it’s all fake?
“Yes, it’s nice to meet you. Sorry for coming by so late.” I apologised even though it was only 9:30 p.m., which wasn’t that late on a Friday.
“Oh, nonsense. Don’t apologise. I’m just happy to meet you finally. I was beginning to think Ryder had made you up or something.” She laughed, flashing dimples just like Ryder’s.
“Oh no. I’m real.” I shifted uncomfortably, unsure how to take that comment. Ryder had told her about me. She believed I was his girlfriend. That was weird.
“Yes, you are. Anyway, Ryder is upstairs. You can go on up. Third door on the left.” She smiled and walked off, leaving me standing there dumbstruck for a moment. I made my way up the stairs, my heart pounding harder with each step I took closer to Ryder’s room. Finally reaching the door, I wondered whether I should knock or just walk in. Knocking was probably better in case he was busy or something. Raising my fist to knock on the door, I hesitated again.
This was a bad idea. I shouldn’t have come. I was a nervous wreck. I liked Ryder more than I realised, and there I was standing outside the door to his room where he was alone and waiting for me. I couldn’t do this. Why did Indie have to make me realise my feelings? I was happy being ignorant and only thinking we were friends. This was too much pressure. I was about to turn around and walk away when the door suddenly opened and I was face-to-face with Ryder’s naked chest.
I gulped.
“Bailey, what are you doing?” he asked, tugging on my wrist and pulling me into his room, closing the door behind us.
“I uh. uhm…I was…” I stuttered, unable to stop staring at his toned chest and stomach. My eyes drifted to the v defining his hips, and my mouth went dry. Oh wow!
“I was about to knock.” I shook my head trying to clear my thoughts. I couldn’t let him know how I felt. But apparently, my ogling was too obvious.
“Like what you see, love?” He smirked at me. Damn him for being so attractive and knowing it. Sighing in defeat, I nodded, admitting it, which only made him smile widely, showing off those dimples.
“What were you doing out there so long?” he asked. “I didn’t think you were ever going to knock.” As he threw himself down on the maroon-coloured comforter, I contemplated running away. I stood there and stared at him awkwardly before shifting my gaze around the room. There was a large desk in the corner piled high with books, a hamper under the window overflowing with clothes, and a tall dresser by the door. Aside from the random posters of girls and cars on his walls, his room was relatively neat and clean. Surprising for a guy.
I glanced at the bed and back to him again, twirling a strand of my hair nervously. He patted the bed beside him, indicating it was okay for me to sit there, but I didn’t. I stayed standing in the middle of the room. Not trusting myself, or him. We tended to get a bit carried away. A bit caught up in the moment. And if a bed was involved, I was afraid that I wouldn’t be able to keep control of the situation.
“Bailey, what’s wrong?” Ryder asked, sitting up and crossing his long legs in front of him.
“Nothing.” I shook my head and twisted my hands together, trying to avoid eye contact with him. I liked him and didn’t know how to behave around him now.