I struggled in Arik’s arms, pushing my back hard against his chest, trying to break free of his embrace. “Let me go. I have to go. They’ll kill him.”
“The gateway is lost,” Arik said against the back of my head.
“No, no, no, no.” I gulped in several breaths. “Please, let me go. He—he can’t be gone.”
Arik’s arms tightened, and I pushed against them harder.
He held me for a long while as I cried, painful sobs shaking my body. His warm breaths puffed against my hair and the back of my ear.
Oh Bastien.
I prayed for him to be all right. I asked every saint I’d learned about in Sunday school to watch out for him. I begged God to trade me for him. To bring him back. And I doubted any of them would listen. I wasn’t even sure I had faith anymore. So why would they care that my heart had been ripped from me? That Bastien was gone?
Jaran sat on his heels in front of me and wiped my eyes with some tissues he must have found in the library. “Come on. We need to go.”
I took a deep breath and shook my head hard. “No. I can’t leave him.”
“He’s gone,” Jaran said. “We can’t help him here. Not if we are caught. Can you stand?”
I nodded.
Arik released me, and I stood on shaky legs. Jaran wrapped an arm behind my back and guided me to the entrance into Barmhilde. My knees buckled as another sob tore from my throat.
Jaran lifted me into his arms, and I wrapped mine around his neck. “I’m here,” he said. “You’re not alone.”
…
Jaran’s eyes followed my pacing. The tent felt hot and suffocating. “Why are they making us wait? We have to go after Bastien.” I fisted my hands to stop them from shaking. The fear of what Bastien could be going through clenched my stomach and twisted it tight.
Please, let him be okay.
A light tapping came from the outside of my tent. Jaran pushed the flap aside.
Arik ran his hand through his hair, shifting his weight.
Emily smiled, a tray of food in her hands. “I brought you something to eat. You need to get your strength up.” She pushed past me.
“We must talk about what happened,” Arik said. “I hope you’re up for it. I believe it will help Bastien if…”
We all knew what Arik couldn’t finish.
If he is alive.
“I wasn’t sure what you liked, so I brought a little of everything,” Emily said and placed the tray of food beside the pillows on the floor.
I crossed the carpet to the corner of the room and sat on a pillow. Arik dropped down on one opposite me. “Tell me about the events leading up to the Writhes’ attack in the library,” he said.
Jaran adjusted on a pillow beside me. “She might need more time to recover.”
“We haven’t the luxury of time,” Arik said.
“It’s okay. I’m fine.” A sense of doom weighed on me when I thought about what had happened in the cave only hours ago. “Conemar ambushed us.”
Demos came in balancing a metal box in his arms. “It’s all over the Mystik news.” He set the box down and pushed some buttons on it. A hologram image snapped on above the box. Screaming came from the speakers. Between the hurricane and cracking earth, the Tetrad moved like a glacier, destroying everything in its path.
Four beasts, each threatening and scary.
The despair on the people’s faces matched what was in my heart.
“What coven is that?” I asked.
“Nymhold,” Jaran said, ignoring the platter of food beside him.
I covered my face with my hands. “It’s my fault. I failed.”
“You’re alive,” Arik said, going into his leader mode. “That’s all that matters. We’ll have to figure out a way to stop the beast.” He must’ve remembered he was no longer our leader and added, “We must ask Lei what she wants to do.”
“We have a way,” I said. “Royston.”
Arik’s eyes were stuck on the hologram. “Then we’ll make a plan. This time you’ll include us. We would’ve been better prepared for what happened in the library if we knew what you were doing. Someone needs to get Lei.”
The flap opened and Lei came in. “I’m here. Everyone in the camp has a Mystik box on.” She slanted a look at me. “How could you have been so careless?”
“I didn’t think…” I said. “I don’t know how they knew where to find us. Royston and I were both shielded.”
Royston came into my tent, his arm raised. Deidre was right behind him, a frown on her face. The silver tracer Aetnae had given me shook on Royston’s wrist like it was stuck on a flytrap. “What is this thing doing? It won’t leave me alone and has been annoying me for hours.”
“It wants free,” I said. “Blow on it.”
He did as I said, and the tracer lifted off his skin. It swirled in the air around us before hovering in front of me. “Gia,” a ghostly voice came from it. “Go to the library.”
“It’s Aetnae,” I said, watching the tracer escape through the opening of the tent.
We passed questioning looks. “I guess we should go,” I said.
“Get your gear on,” Arik said, standing. “We’ll meet at the entrance into the library.”
The others followed him out, except Deidre—she turned to me as I straightened. “I’m going. You’re not leaving me behind, again. I’ve been trained to fight like a guard.”
“No,” I said. “You’re not going with us. You don’t have magic.”
And I can’t lose anyone else.
“You can’t protect everyone, Gia,” she said, crossing her arms. “And you can’t prevent me from fighting for a cause and avenging my mother’s death.”
My fear finally dropped to my feet, and she must’ve seen it on my face.
“I know.” She grasped my arm and looked tenderly into my eyes. “I love you, too. And I’m afraid of losing you, but I’d never stop you. It would be selfish of me. So let’s kick some bad guys’ asses and win the day, okay?”
I chuckled. “I think Pop should limit your Netflix binging. You’re sounding more like an American teen every day. Sinead would be mad if—” I stopped myself. “I’m sorry.”
A sadness settled in her eyes. “Don’t worry about mentioning her. We can talk about my mother. Laugh and cry while remembering her time with us. But let’s not omit her from our lives, okay?” A smile turned the corners of her mouth. “Besides, she’d be angry if we forgot her.”
“I don’t think I’ve ever seen her angry.”
“That’s because she missed your puberty years.” She went to the exit. “Trust me. She got frustrated with me often. Get dressed. See you in a few.” She disappeared around the flap.
…
Being back in the Chetham’s library caused all my fears and sadness over Bastien to rush back to me. There was no telling what Conemar and his creatures were doing to him. I pushed that thought to the back of my mind. Crumbling wouldn’t get him back if he was alive. I had to press on and stop Conemar.
Dressed in proper Sentinel gear—metal breastplates, helmets, swords, and shields—which the Couve guards had brought for us, we eased down the row of bookcases in teams, back to back, covering one another.