As You Wish

They went to a side door, not through the kitchen in case some of the staff were lingering. But she doubted that they stayed two minutes after her parents left.

The big house had that silent, eerie feel of being empty. They walked softly and didn’t speak. When they got to the big entry hall, Alejandro halted.

It was an impressive area, with a marble floor and big Chinese jugs perfectly placed. In the center was a round table that was suited to be in a museum.

“One time I kicked a soccer ball across this room. My mother was not pleased.” His expression showed his pity for her.

The stairs were wide, and curved, and carpeted in deep red. Elise went up first, then turned to face him and kept going up. “In case you ever need to know, you can sneak down these stairs in silence. And the freezer always has ice cream in it.”

“I’ll remember that.”

At the head of the stairs, she went past two closed doors, then opened the one on the left. Inside was a large room created for a little girl. There was a four-poster bed with a domed canopy. Behind the bed was a silk hanging embroidered with a tree. White cabinets had shelves full of books. A bulletin board had notes about homework due.

“It’s all pink,” he said.

“Peach. A much more subtle color, according to the designer.” She opened two big louvered doors to expose a wide, long closet packed full of clothes.

“These are all yours?”

“Every dress, shoe, necklace, and headband.” She put on a pink Alice band to demonstrate.

“I like your hair loose better. Or pulled back. Maybe with a rose.”

“Like a flamenco dancer?”

“Like a pretty girl who is happy with her life.”

“In that case, no roses for me.” She took off the headband. “Sit down while I look through things.”

There was a big round hassock in the corner and he sat on it, watching her as she opened and closed drawers and tossed things onto the floor near him.

“Why are your clothes here and not in your house?”

“Not enough room over there. And Kent’s suits—” She broke off. They never mentioned his name. It was as though they didn’t want to remember that he existed. Saying it aloud put reality into the day.

Alejandro picked up a blue-and-white dress. It had wide straps at the top and a gathered skirt. “This is pretty. You could dance in it.”

It took her a moment to bring her mind back to the present. “I wore that at a garden party my mother had. It has a jacket. Ah. Here it is.” She held up a short, dark blue bolero.

“Very nice. I like it. So how are you going to get all of this to your house?” She gave him a sweet smile. “I’m a man. I don’t carry dresses. At least not empty ones.”

“I’ll stuff them full of other clothes, then you’ll just have to carry one.”

He groaned. “Where’s the chair I’m supposed to take?”

“It’s—Ow.” She’d tripped over Alejandro’s feet as he sprawled on the hassock. He caught her arm, but instead of the usual flirtiness, he was looking around the big closet and frowning.

It was as though she could read his mind. “I don’t need all these things to be happy.”

“But it’s what you’re used to. It’s your world. It’s where you belong.”

He said this in Spanish and his deep voice made it beautiful. He was still holding her bare upper arm. Without thinking what she was doing, she put her hand on his warm chest and leaned forward. To kiss his lips was all she could think of.

He hesitated, but then he pushed her away and stood up. He seemed to be trying to act as though nothing had happened. “Are you sure you need all these clothes?”

The intimate moment was gone. Behind him, Elise closed her eyes. When she opened them, Alejandro was looking at her in the mirror over the dresser. For a flash of a second, she saw the longing in his eyes. The deep wanting of something that he knew he could never have.

Elise wanted to go to him but couldn’t. He was right. Her life; his life. They weren’t alike. They didn’t even run side by side.

“If we could meet on common ground,” she whispered, “as equals, we could—” Turning, he gave her a look that made her stop talking. They both knew it was no use.

If they began something they couldn’t finish, the pain they felt now was nothing to what it could be.

She gave a quick nod of understanding and stepped away from him. It took a deep breath to bring her back to the present. Away from what might be and back to what was. “How many shoes can you carry?”

He gave a slow smile, glad she understood. “One pair and that’s all.”

“I bet we could slide a dozen pair of sandals over your arms.”

“Like a horse harness?”

Elise’s gasped. “Horse! My riding lesson. I’ve got to go!”

He started toward the door.

“You forgot my clothes.”

“I thought you were in a hurry to leave.”

“Not so much that I’d forget my dresses. Hold out your arms and I’ll pack you.”

“A horse, a mule, a Christmas tree,” he muttered as she slid sandals over his forearms, and they smiled at each other.





Chapter Nine

Both Kathy and Olivia were staring at Elise in wide-eyed shock. Kathy recovered first. “You didn’t go to bed with him?”

“No. And now I deeply regret it.”

“I know all about regrets,” Olivia said. “If I’d only said or done what my heart told me to, I would have had a lifetime of...of happiness.” She looked at Elise. “What was your excuse?”

“Guilt. Kent was working so hard. For me. At least I thought he was. But I was playing around with the gardener and...” She shrugged. “Maybe I was afraid of the intensity of what I felt for Alejandro—and I didn’t know if I actually liked him or just lusted after him.”

“Did you find out?” Olivia asked.

“I think so.” She swallowed. “No, that’s not true. The lust I could handle. Whether I did or didn’t go to bed with him, that was cut-and-dried. But liking him, maybe even...” She paused. “Maybe even loving him was what I couldn’t bear.”

She looked at them. “I knew Alejandro was right. We came from two different worlds. It’s romantic to say ‘We’ll live on love’ but it’s not very practical.”

“I know about the struggle to pay the bills,” Olivia said. “Sometimes money becomes the number one thing in life.”

“Hmph!” Kathy said. “With a father like mine and married to his clone, I’m well aware of the importance of money.”

“After the time in my closet, I began to think about what I was doing.”

“I wish I’d been that smart with Ray,” Kathy said.

“At the time I didn’t feel smart. I felt cold and calculating. I thought about the truth of divorcing Kent and running away with the beautiful Alejandro. Then what? I have no job skills so I didn’t think I could help financially. And forget the money, there were our families. My family would disown me for sure. And I can’t imagine that his family would accept me. One of us was going to have to give up his or her entire life, friends and family, places, everything! For one of us, all that we knew would be taken away. When I looked at it, I could only see it ending badly.”

Elise put her hands over her face. “I felt awful about my thoughts, but all I could see was that Alejandro and I would come to hate each other—and it would be my fault.”

“So what did you do?” Kathy asked.

“I knew I had to end it with him. Stop it before the word love was spoken.”

Elise looked away and squeezed her eyes shut in an attempt to stop the tears. “I made all these decisions before we finished the herb garden. It was so cute. Very simple with its little gravel paths and the birdbath in the middle. We had such a good time doing it! He and I went to the nurseries to buy the plants. We had glorious, wonderful, divine days of laughter while riding around in Diego’s old truck. There was no AC, and the wind whipped in through the open windows. We’d arrive at a nursery sweating and happy.”

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