“You will?”
“Yeah,” he said. “It’s the decent thing to do. Like I said, she’s a very nice lady. But it had the worst effect on me, hearing that. I went back to work and couldn’t stop thinking about my mom. My mom has not had an easy life. She’s had two lousy, abusive husbands, never had an extra dollar to spend, but she was always there for me. You know? Always pulling for me, having long talks with me about every stupid, pissant problem I thought I had. She’s always doing a little extra for me—like making my favorite dinner if she knew it had been a big day. My brother, too—she made so many sacrifices for both of us. A lot of the time it was just me and my mom. She’s about the same age as Alyssa’s mom—not even sixty years old. Just the thought of her suddenly getting sick and dying—it just hit me. I should do more for my mom. I should at least let her know how much I appreciate her because you never know. Right?”
“Did you tell your mom why you wanted to see her?” Sierra asked.
“Not till I got there, but she figured out real fast that I don’t drop everything and drive to Denver unless I have something on my mind. Something I couldn’t figure out on my own. But why’d I have to do this at rush hour? I hate traffic.”
“Oh, Connie, I’m just not used to a man like you,” she said, touching his cheek.
“I hope that’s not a bad thing,” he said.
“Are you feeling better now?” she asked.
“Yes. I’m not sorry you were worried, though. Thought I was going to make another run at Alyssa, did you?” he asked with an evil grin.
“For a minute, I did,” she said with a laugh. “She’s very beautiful.”
“So are you,” he said.
“I’m a little woodland creature compared to her,” she said. “A gopher next to a gazelle...”
“You’re very beautiful compared to her, not that any comparisons ever crossed my mind. Sierra, get this straight—Alyssa doesn’t tempt me. Not in the smallest way. How can I say this without sounding like an ass? I’m glad she screwed it up because now I can see it wasn’t right.” He shook his head. “I don’t even think of her as a friend.”
“But she wants to get back together with you, doesn’t she?”
“I don’t know. She did before but I shut that down. And if she still does—it’s not my problem. It’s not possible.”
She just looked at his beautiful face for a moment. Molly nosed her hand, looking for a little attention. “You went to see your mom. And I thought you were with another girl.”
“I’m flattered, but I’m really not that guy. So—since you’re here, wanna come inside?”
“Yes,” she said. “Can Molly come, too?”
“All your family is welcome,” he said.
If I loved you less,
I might be able to talk about it more.
—Jane Austen
Chapter 11
CONNIE SCOOPED HER up, called to Molly, and carried Sierra over the threshold and into his house. He stopped just inside the closed door. “I guess you can tell, I wasn’t expecting company.”
His clean laundry was dumped on the couch for folding, two pairs of running shoes and a pair of boots sat on the floor where they’d been kicked off. There was a small dinette in the breakfast nook and each one of the four chairs held up a jacket or down vest. Molly was off, nosing around the place, probably looking for something to chew on.
“It has that lived-in look,” she said.
“I don’t spend much time here,” he said. “Especially lately.”
He leaned toward her until their lips were almost touching and with a gentle tongue, outlined her lips. Her arms around his neck tightened just slightly. “I wanted you in my house,” he said softly. “I want you in my bed.”
“I don’t know if I can,” she said. “My last time was—” She didn’t finish but she did cast her eyes downward.
Connie kissed her, softly at first, then with more pressure, yet tenderly. He pulled her lower lip between his, sucking it into his mouth. “I have an idea,” he said. “Why don’t you not think about the last time? In fact, don’t think about any other time, ever. And we’ll go very slow. Very, very slow, so slow you’ll ask me to go a little faster. But I won’t. I’m just going to take my sweet time and you’re going to be in charge. I have a feeling it’s going to be good. I mean, epic.” Then he buried his lips in her neck, kissing and sucking.
“Oh God,” she whispered.
“It’s bound to happen one of these days,” he said. “If it doesn’t happen now, let’s at least play around a little.”
She couldn’t help herself. She giggled.
“Seriously, I have to touch you,” he said. “I’m not going to rush you.”
“Okay,” she said weakly. “I’m a little nervous.”
He gave her lips a little peck. “Me, too.”
He carried her into the bedroom where the bed was made. “Amazing,” she said. “A bomb went off in your living room, but you made the bed?”
“I like it that way.”
“Have you been planning this?” she asked as he put her down.
“Every day,” he said. He toed off his shoes and got on the bed beside her, pulling her into his arms.
“Oh-oh,” Sierra said just as Molly jumped onto the bed.
“Not this time, Molly,” he said. “Down.”
The silly dog did exactly as Conrad instructed.
“You’re going to have to show me how you did that,” Sierra said.
“Later,” he said, covering her lips with his. His hands moved from her back to her butt to her hips to her thighs and back again. He untucked her shirt and slid his big hands underneath, moaning into her mouth as he massaged her back, her belly, her breasts. Her body immediately strained against his in a movement so natural it almost took her by surprise. He lifted her shirt over her head, got rid of her bra and immediately transferred his kisses to her breasts, favoring one then the other, gently taking a nipple into his mouth.
“Okay,” she whispered. “Okay, good idea...”
“Told you,” he said, unzipping her shorts. He took so long in starting to slide them over her hips that she got in his way and did it herself, bringing a throaty laugh from him. He filled his big hands with her round butt, pulling her against him. He was hard as a rock and ready. And very big.
“Oh boy,” she whispered.
She felt him through his pants and then almost in a panic, had to get her hand on him just to be sure he was human. She unbuttoned his pants and, not taking nearly the time or care he had, shoved them out of the way. He kicked them off and rolled away just enough to get rid of his shirt. Then he pulled her against his chest and hummed.
And here we are, she thought. Right where I want to be, pressed up against the most beautiful man, his large hands both stimulating and comforting. She was safe. She was protected. She lifted a leg onto his hip.
“I need a condom,” he said.
“Please.”