He ran the pad of his thumb under her right eye. “I’m not sure,” he admitted. “I just know that I won’t.”
“This wasn’t you.” She shut her eyes again, but he forced them open by tilting her chin up with the hands he still held her head with. It wasn’t a question, and in truth she hadn’t really meant to say it aloud at all.
“The Tandem game,” he told her quietly, “that was me. I was going to lead you there and be done with it. Be free.”
“But you didn’t get me close enough.” She frowned, unsure why his admission made her less afraid of him instead of more. Maybe she was going into shock? That made sense after everything she’d been through.
“No.” He shook his head. “I didn’t.”
She had no idea if he was telling her that was done on purpose, if he’d let her walk away, or if it’d merely been a miscalculation on his part. Before she could even think to ask, his smooth voice was surrounding her once more.
“I had nothing to do with the other night,” he assured her, “or with what just took place here. If I still wanted to kill you, you’d be dead. Some part of you knows that’s true.”
“Why are you telling me this?”
The look he gave her then was piercing—so much so, she felt it down to her toes.
“Because,” he said breathlessly, “I want you to understand that I mean it when I tell you I won’t let anyone else hurt you. The only person on this planet you have to fear, Olena, is me. I could have killed you on the field. I chose not to. The only reason you were even still alive long enough for those other attempts to be made is because I allowed it. And to answer your earlier question”—his hands slipped down to the base of her skull, holding her more securely—“no, I haven’t come up with a solution that doesn’t involve my killing you.”
Oh yeah, she was pretty sure she was going to throw up. With any luck, he’d still be kneeling in front of her when it happened.
“But I am trying to,” he shocked her by adding.
What shocked her even more was that she believed him.
CHAPTER 19
Ruckus showed up a few minutes later, Pettus and Lura close behind him. By then Trystan had already moved to the other side of the room to continue his pacing, so Ruckus was able to get close to her. He wrapped his arms around her as she stood, holding her against him gently but tightly. His warm breath fanned against the crown of her head, and for a moment neither of them spoke.
“I found her fleeing the grounds,” Pettus said then, loud enough for them all to hear, though he was looking at Trystan when he did so. “She was about to board a hover car.”
Those things still amazed Delaney. Ruckus had finally gotten around to showing her some of their vehicles. On Xenith none of the cars had wheels; they all floated. He’d begun to explain how the science of it all worked, but she’d quickly shut him down.
Some things were just information overload at that point.
“Still think she’s innocent?” Trystan asked, staring at Delaney.
She hadn’t said as much aloud, but he must have been able to figure out the direction of her thoughts. That was unnerving, because when she’d been having them, he’d been busy pacing. Yet again, she hadn’t realized he was paying such close attention to her.
“What happened?” Ruckus demanded, shifting so that he had all four of them in his line of sight.
“Someone put toxic in her teekee.” Trystan curled two of his fingers toward Pettus and pointed out the side door that led to the balcony. “Put the atteta in one of the chairs. Maybe she’ll smartly be more cooperative if she sees what she almost did to the Lissa.”
Lura already looked sick, paler than snow, her emerald eyes as round as saucers. There were bags under her eyes that Delaney hadn’t noticed earlier, and her whole body was quaking in Pettus’s arms. She was afraid, yet another sign that attested to her guilt. She’d changed out of her uniform in a hurry, the pale yellow shirt she was wearing not buttoned up all the way. The buttons that were had been done haphazardly, and one leg of her black pants was tucked into a boot that had been left unzipped, while the other leg hung loose over the zipped boot.
“What happened?” Ruckus asked Delaney then as they watched Pettus lead the girl outside as he’d been instructed.
“I knocked the mug over, and Trystan stopped me from touching it,” she said. “If he hadn’t been here, I probably would have drunk it.”
“What was he doing here?” Ruckus frowned over at her, then began to head after the Zane and the Teller, keeping Delaney securely at his back as he did so. It didn’t seem necessary; Lura was too terrified to try anything here in front of them.
Delaney couldn’t decide who Lura was more afraid of: Trystan or Ruckus. She kept ducking glances between the two of them, flinching whenever she caught one of their eyes.
“He wanted to talk.” She didn’t know how else to explain, so she kept it simple.
“Have the Basileus and Basilissa been notified?” Trystan was asking Pettus, who stood behind Lura, holding her down in one of the metal chairs on the balcony. Trystan stood on the other side of the table, his arms crossed, cocking his head in an intimidating manner.
“Yes, I informed them. They said to allow the Ander to handle it,” Pettus said.
Of course they did.
“Wouldn’t expect them to want to check on their only child or anything,” she grumbled, then realized it was out loud when three sets of eyes darted her way. She’d sounded bitter, and for all she knew, Olena couldn’t give two shits about her parents.
“Why’d you do it?” Delaney turned her attention to Lura, taking charge. Moving around Ruckus so she could get a better look, she carefully avoided getting close to the melted table.
Lura closed her eyes and inhaled shakily. When Pettus’s hands clenched harder on her shoulders, she winced and then reopened her eyes on Delaney. It wasn’t comforting to know that Olena was the only one on the balcony the atteta wasn’t afraid of.
“No one wants you here.” Her voice was soft, low, but there was a distinct underlying layer of hatred. “You should have stayed on Earth.”
“On that we agree.” She shrugged when Ruckus glared. There was no point pretending otherwise on that aspect; Trystan already knew how she felt about him.
“Linking you to the Zane will only result in the end of our people,” Lura continued. “You’re no leader. He’ll be the one taking control, with you a mere armpiece. You’ll be the death of Vakar society, and he’ll be the weapon you use.”
Delaney’s brows winged up, and she gaped for a moment before regaining control. “You’re serious?”
At Lura’s silence, it became apparent she was.