There is absolutely no question in my mind that I have to end it with Derek. It isn’t fair to either of us. I’m not even mad about the night I got sick. It was a dick move on his part, but it isn’t a deal breaker.
Braxton is the deal breaker.
I’ll simply tell Derek I don’t see our relationship going anywhere, and I think we should go our separate ways. I don’t know whether he’ll even care very much. When we first started dating, he seemed totally into me, but lately I’m left wondering if he’d notice if we didn’t see each other for a long time.
Regardless of my recent revelation, Derek and I don’t have a future, and I know it.
I have no clue what I’m going to do about Braxton. I’m a mess. Telling him the truth is completely out of the question. There is no way I can let this slip. We’ve been friends for too long, and this threatens every fiber of that friendship. Despite the way he looks at me sometimes, I can’t imagine he feels the same way. He’s just a shameless flirt. He’s not serious about any woman, so I can’t expect that he’d magically be serious about me. And the last thing I need is to become another notch on Braxton’s bedpost.
I try for almost a week to see Derek in person, but he always has a reason he can’t. I don’t want to do this over the phone, but I decide I can’t take the waiting anymore, and call him.
“Hey, babe,” he says. He sounds distracted.
“Derek, do you have a minute to talk?” I say. “Is this a good time?”
“Yeah, sure,” he says.
“Listen, I didn’t want to do this over the phone, but I keep trying to get together, and you’re always too busy,” I say.
“Okay.”
I take a deep breath. “I don’t think we should see each other anymore.” There, I said it.
Derek is quiet for a long moment. “Are you serious?”
“Yes,” I say. “I’m so sorry, Derek. You’re a great guy, but … we’re not great together. We’re just okay. I want more than okay.”
I hear him take a breath. “Yeah, I kind of knew this was coming. It sucks, Kylie. You’re a great girl.”
“Thanks,” I say. “I just … I can’t pretend, you know? I realized this isn’t going anywhere. We both deserve better than that.”
“I suppose we do,” he says.
Wow. This is, like, the easiest breakup I’ve ever had. We don’t even have stuff at each other’s places to worry about. “You okay?”
“Sure,” he says. “I’ll be fine. Take care, Kylie. It’s been real.”
“Yeah, you too.”
I hang up and sink down into the couch. I’m so grateful that’s over. It’s a ding to my pride that he didn’t try to change my mind, but I suppose that confirms I did the right thing.
Now what?
I need to tell Selene. Maybe she’ll be inspired to dump Matthew. She never has anything nice to say about their relationship anymore.
But it’s not Selene who floods my mind. It’s Braxton.
I wouldn’t normally get hold of him just to tell him I broke up with someone—not unless I was heartbroken and wanted to cry on his shoulder, which has happened more times than I’d like to admit.
I’m certainly not heartbroken now. But Derek was his client. I should give him a heads up. Just because of the impact to his business. That’s all.
I could text him, but I find myself dialing his number.
“Hey, baby girl,” he says.
My heart wants to leap out of my chest at the sound of his voice.
“Hi, Brax,” I say. Go on. Just say it. “If you’re not busy, do you want to grab dinner?”
Wait, why did I say that? I don’t need to do this in person.
“Love to,” he says. “Tonight?”
“Sure,” I say. Okay, this is fine. “Meet me at Brody’s in an hour?”
“I’ll be there,” he says.
***
I sit in a booth at the back of the restaurant. I’m glad they gave me this spot. I feel protected back here, without many customers nearby. I’m so jumpy, my heart feels like it’s going to beat out of my chest.
Braxton comes in, sunglasses on his face. Fuck, he’s beautiful. His muscles strain against his black shirt; his jeans drape perfectly down his strong legs. I can’t see his ass but I know how amazing it is, especially in those jeans. He pulls his sunglasses off and grins at me across the restaurant.
My tummy flutters like I’m a little girl with a crush. I smile and take a quick sip of water. Why am I so nervous? All I want to do is tell him I broke up with Derek. That shouldn’t be a big deal. He and I have been through more than our share of relationships over the years. Why does this feel like such momentous news? Like everything is going to change when I tell him?
He slides into the booth, and a waitress appears. She looks admiringly at him, more or less ignoring me. It pisses me off. I want to push her away from the table and tell her to stop fucking looking at him.