I wanted to hug Donal before he left, because what if Uncle Sean didn’t bring him back? But he ran out to the car before I could.
They came back laughing and made a mess. Hamburger blood dripped off the counter onto the floor, and Mama and Liam snorted meth off the kitchen table, where it left dust under the metal edge that was so hard to keep clean.
They made so much noise. A broken plate, Liam laughing, Donal squealing. Then Uncle Sean turned on the radio and danced Mama around while the potatoes burned.
“Damn, you’re gorgeous. Why don’t you leave this chump and run away with me?”
Mama laughed but her eyes looked hot and scary.
“Here, now, are you trying to romance my wife right under my nose?” Liam said.
Uncle Sean laughed and twirled Mama around, while Liam set the table.
“Oh, Liam, put a plate on the table for her anyway,” Mama said. Her eyes were so soft when she looked at me standing in the hallway, but I knew not to trust those eyes.
“I’m not gonna sit here with her watching us eat,” Liam said.
“But your mama made the good meatloaf. You don’t want any?” Uncle Sean came toward me with a green olive in his hand, but when I ducked my head, he laughed and popped the olive in his own mouth.
Pulling up chairs to the table, no one else noticed the rumble of the Panhead coming up the drive. They were too busy putting food on their plates: burned mashed potatoes and greasy meatloaf, because Mama forgot to put bread in the bottom of the pan.
“Damn, did you smell the meatloaf from down the hill?” Liam said, when Kellen walked in. “This son of a bitch can eat, in case you couldn’t tell.”
Uncle Sean laughed and stood up to shake hands. “Come on, pull up a chair.”
“Thanks, but I just came to get Wavy.” Kellen looked at me for a second, not long enough. Liam made me invisible. I needed Kellen to see me.
“Get Wavy for what?” Mama said.
“To go for a ride.”
“Uh-oh, Wavy, Donal’s gonna eat your meatloaf if you don’t.” Uncle Sean reached out with another green olive stolen from the meatloaf. Donal opened his mouth and took it.
That scared me. What if it wasn’t dangerous for Donal to be with Liam and Sean, because he was one of them?
“Don’t be ridiculous,” Mama said. “It’s dinner time, Kellen, and we’ve got company. She’s staying here to visit with her uncle.”
“Sorry, I didn’t know. Maybe tomorrow, Wavy.”
Kellen went out and closed the door. His boots thumped down the porch steps, but I didn’t hear his bike start. He was outside waiting for me.
“Make her go up to her room,” Liam said to Mama.
I thought about going after Kellen. The only question was whether to leave Donal. I slipped my fingers between the slats of his chair and pinched him hard in the side.
“Ow!” He turned around and looked at me with confused, almost-crying eyes.
“Wavy, what did you do to your brother?” Mama said.
“Nothing,” Donal said.
He wasn’t one of them.
*
I pressed my ear to the floor in my room, but all I could hear was laughing and talking. Later someone came up the stairs, slow like Kellen, but not as big. Donal.
“Mama says for me to sleep up here so Uncle Sean can have my bed,” he said.
I fell asleep beside Donal and woke up to something that wasn’t laughing.
“Yeah, well, I’m your brother, so I think that makes the situation special.”
Was it Liam or Uncle Sean? Through the floor it was hard to tell.
“Is that the whole reason you came here? Put on this big brother act?” Liam.
“Baby, why couldn’t we?” Mama.
“Stay the fuck outta this, Val. It’s not your money, so shut your trap.”
“It’s just a loan. I guess I thought it mattered that I took care of Val after you got arrested,” Sean said.
“Don’t throw that in my face,” Liam said.
Then it was all shouting and the sound of things breaking and someone getting hit. I couldn’t tell who was who until Mama screamed. Then it was Liam who said, “You fucking whore,” and Mama who said, “Don’t. Don’t. Please, Liam.”
Deputy Vogel told me to call him if I ever needed something. It’s what they taught in school, too. They said the police were there to help you, but I don’t think they knew what happened when the police came to your house. Cops ruin everything. They kick in the front door, throw people on the floor and handcuff them. They break things and steal things. They lock you in a patrol car, make you spend all night in the police station wearing your nightgown, and then send you home with strangers. That’s why I would never call Deputy Vogel, no matter how much Mama and Liam fought. I’d thrown away the paper with his number as soon as he gave it to me, because I remembered what happened the last time the police came to our house.