Aliens Abroad

Lizzie laughed. “He will, I’m sure. He loves doing stuff like that.”

Wasim looked a little crestfallen and as if his feelings were hurt, though he was trying to hide it. Lizzie seemed oblivious. Heaved an internal sigh. This was like watching me and Chuckie from our youth, but from the outside, where I got to see how many times I’d hurt Chuckie’s feelings without realizing it—or realizing that he’d been in love with me. I didn’t for one moment regret marrying Jeff, but I’d seen what Bizarro World Chuckie had been like, and if Lizzie could score with Wasim what Other Me had with Bizarro World Chuckie, there were far worse ways to be happily married.

“It’s tough being the smartest guy in the room, Wasim, but I’m glad you’re willing to be helpful. We can’t afford anyone to be a maverick right now.”

This didn’t seem to cheer him up. Heaved another internal sigh. Maybe I needed to have a Mom Talk with Lizzie.

Who finally noted Wasim’s expression. She nudged him. “Bet you know more about what’s going on than the Martini kids, or any of the rest of the clan. You want to play a trivia game about this while we wait?”

He brightened up. “Certainly, if you’d like to.”

She smiled. “I always like doing fun stuff with you, so yeah.”

“I will moderate the game,” Gadhavi said, presumably offering so that he could assist Wasim in as many ways as possible, most likely in terms of getting game. Gadhavi had a yeoman’s job ahead of him, but I found it rather touching that he, like me, cared enough to keep trying. That even someone who’d been the scariest gangster in the Middle East could have a soft spot for a sweet kid who just needed some help to be cool was proof, to me, that pretty much anyone could be redeemed if they wanted to be. “You go do your jobs.”

“Include Hacker International. We need to be sure they’re occupied, possibly more than the kids.”

“None will leave while on my watch,” Gadhavi said.

Thusly reassured by our resident grizzly, Drax and I left our gigantic posse in the observation lounge, though Mossy came along with us. Hoped we weren’t going to be at the command deck too long, since we were there to choose the away team.

Happily, there wasn’t a lot of argument. It was a given that Jeff and I needed to make the trek along with Team Tinman and, of course, our Guinea pig, aka Wruck. As discussed earlier, the plan had been confirmed—Wruck would go first and, if he was able to handle the suits Fathade had, then the Kristie-Bot would give it a try and so on.

Chuckie and Reader were with us, too, though Tim was staying on the command deck with the remainder of Airborne, just in case we all got into trouble. Drax and Mossy were approved to go as well, since that gave us five different races represented. Tito insisted on coming in case we needed medical and, miraculously, Mother agreed.

We all went to the airlock with Wruck. While on the way, Drax, Mossy, and I shared what we’d seen from the observation lounge, in case those at command had missed it. They’d seen most of it, but hadn’t spotted the people.

“Living robots?” Jeff asked. “That seems . . . far-fetched, and I say that knowing that we have, essentially, living robots with us right now.”

“I get why it seems like that,” Joe said. “This was done to us, we weren’t born this way.”

Resisted the urge to put on Lady Gaga but, as always, it took effort.

Randy shrugged. “It’s a big galaxy, Jeff. I can believe it. I mean, our brains are basically organic circuits. And I mean everyone’s, not just Joe’s and mine.”

“It’s not that much of a leap, honestly,” Reader added. “We have trace metals in us.”

“This is true,” Drax agreed. “Procreation is, at its core, merely the passing along of DNA. All it takes is the right situation for a mass of wiring or a lump of metal to have the correct electrical charge to create life. After that, the evolution begins and, with it, sentience.”

“Which is a simplified explanation,” Chuckie said, looking both interested and excited, “but not wrong at all. Our world is mostly water and we’re mostly water—that’s not a coincidence. This world is mostly metal and so its people are mostly metal. It makes sense.”

Jeff nodded. “I suppose it does.”

Knew when Chuckie was gearing up for a fun scientific discussion, and also knew without asking that the others were probably willing to go all in on it, Jeff included. I was not. “It might, but I vote for us meeting these people and finding out how they came to be directly from the animatronic horse’s mouths. If, you know, any of us can survive in their atmosphere.”

Wruck chuckled. “Kitty has a point.”

“Spoilsport,” Chuckie said to me with a grin.

“Guilty as charged. Let’s meet their folks and you can talk to their scientific head AI or whomever. I’d like to get us through the initial ‘hello’ phase, though.”

“That’s what I’m here for,” Wruck said.

“You’re sure you can adapt fast enough?” I asked him.

“I am.” He smiled at me. “It will be fine.”

“We’re sure this isn’t an ambush?” Mossy asked me quietly.

“Nothing in life’s certain other than death, taxes, and that our enemies will always be crazed megalomaniacs. But it seems on the up and up.”

We reached the airlock, which was a very large room—all of us could have fit inside it with plenty of room to spare. Grabbed Wruck and hugged him before he went in, just in case. He hugged me and patted my back. “It will be fine.” Then he went through the door.

This worked pretty much like in the movies—he was in the chamber, we closed and locked the big door that had a window in it large enough for us to watch everything, he hit a button, the room did its thing, three different doors or barriers slid open—one to the right, one to the left, and one going up—then the doors opposite ours opened, and Wruck stepped through.

He altered instantly into a metal man. At least, he looked shiny now where he hadn’t before. He took one more step and waited.

“We can’t close the outer door or open this one until he’s farther,” Drax said worriedly.

“I think he’s waiting for someone.”

“He might be,” Chuckie said. “Fathade did say she’d meet us here.”

“Oh, Fathade’s definitely a female? I wasn’t sure.”

“Honestly, I wasn’t sure, either. So I asked. She is a female. They have male, female, nonbinary, multiple, asexual, and shifting genders. It’s fascinating.”

“Remember that we’re on a mission and we can’t stay here for you to get a Ph.D. in Comparative Robotic Studies.”

“Geez, you take the fun out of everything. Jeff, man, I’m sorry she’s such a downer on this trip.”

Jeff laughed as he put his arm around me and patted Chuckie on the back. “Not to worry, Chuck. You can spend all the time you want learning about these people—if they’re open to it—at least until we figure out where Kreaving is.”

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