She shrugged and cleaned her hands off on a napkin. “It’s not a bad thing. It just is what it is. Here we have no judgment, and I enjoy being with you. I like this. Having a friend. But I’m not delusional. I know everyone in Lawton hates me and thinks I’m a liar. Well, everyone but you.”
I had never been openly hated. I wondered what that felt like. How painful and unfair it must be. My anger rose up at all of them. Everyone who had talked bad about her. Everyone who had judged her or been cruel to her. Then I admitted to myself the hardest part: I was one of those everyones. Maybe not now, but I had been once. I wasn’t any better.
“I’m sorry,” I said honestly.
She smiled. “For being my friend?”
“No. For turning on you when I did.”
The smile on her face faded. “We were young. You thought what everyone else did. Besides, I ran out of town. It made me look even more guilty. If I had stayed, life for my family would have just gotten worse, but the fact is we left. People feel sorry for my parents because of me. But these people’ll always hate me. The good thing is I won’t always be there. I’ll get out and make my own way in life soon enough. In a town where no one knows me and I can start fresh. Me and Bryony.”
The image of Riley taking Bryony to some town far away and building a life, getting a job, paying bills, raising her daughter, all while I was off throwing a football and chasing my dream, seemed unfair. So much of her life seemed unfair. She’d missed high school and she’d miss college.
“What was your dream, when you were younger?” I asked her. I didn’t want to say before Bryony, because that sounded cold. Although that was what I wanted to know.
“You mean before I became a mom?” She was smiling as if she read my mind. “I wanted to be a vet.”
“So you love animals,” I said, feeling my heart ache for the girl who wouldn’t be able to chase her dream the way I would.
“Yes. I do. I can’t take care of one now because I can’t afford it. But when Bryony and I have our own place, we will have dogs and cats. Maybe even goats if I get enough land.”
“Could you still go to college to be a vet?”
She shook her head. “No, I need a job that makes enough to support me and Bryony. I have plans. I want to make a difference in girls’ lives like me one day. The teen mom support group I went to got me through tough times. My dream is to do that for young girls. Show them there is happiness in their future. Life isn’t over.”
She didn’t say it with bitterness or anger. Instead she took a drink of her sweet tea and stood up. “I need to go wash myself off,” she explained before walking to the back of the restaurant to the restrooms.
Why did I want her to have that dream so badly? She seemed happy enough, and I had never wanted to fix anyone’s problems as much as I wanted to fix hers. She made me want to protect her and stand by her. Even though she may have been one of the toughest people I’d ever met. If she knew what I was thinking, she’d tell me to stop. She had everything under control.
Maybe that was why I wanted to help her so much. Because she didn’t want help. She wanted to make her own way. And I knew she could.
“Hey, y’all just friends or is she with you?” one of the guys asked from the other table.
I turned to look at him, and his obvious interest pissed me off. Sure, I understood it, but I was jealous. Me. Jealous. Not the kind I felt with Gunner and Willa, but the kind that made me want to stake my claim and threaten him.
“She’s with me,” I replied in a cold tone.
The guy looked let down. “Damn” was his response.
I Didn’t Know Friends Kissed Like That
CHAPTER 23
RILEY
It was after six when Brady pulled into my driveway. I had kept in contact with my mom all day, and Bryony had been fine. As much as I missed her, this little getaway had been needed. I was thankful Brady had thought of it.
I turned to tell him thank you and how much I enjoyed our day when he pulled to a stop, but his gaze was already locked on me. The look in his eyes was different, and I recognized it. Or at least my body did. My heart had picked up its pace, and I felt flushed from anticipation.
Before I could get too nervous or think this through, he leaned over and his right hand cupped my cheek just as he leaned his head down until his lips touched mine. It wasn’t controlling or possessive. It wasn’t like a hungry teenage boy trying to attack me. It was sweet. Like he wanted to savor this.
I moved my body closer to his and opened my mouth beneath his, hoping that wasn’t too much too soon. Although this was not how I expected this day to end. Not that deep down I hadn’t wanted it. Because I had. I knew that. It was just actually having it happen was different. It was exciting and terrifying. Reality had been much different in my head. I had even been debating giving him a hug earlier, not realizing he was planning on this.
His tongue touched mine, and I let out a sound that I hoped sounded as pleased as I was. A real kiss. The kind that meant something was new to me. What I had done before when I was younger had been learning and experimenting. Nothing more. It sure hadn’t made my heart flutter and my body tingle.
I wanted to remember this in case our end came sooner than expected. Although Brady wasn’t my first kiss, he would always be my first meaningful kiss. The first one to affect me.
Slowly he eased back, ending the connection.
“I’ve wanted to do that all day,” he whispered.
I hadn’t realized it, but I was blushing from his admission and thankful for the darkness.
“I didn’t know friends kissed like that,” I replied.
He pressed a small kiss to the corner of my lips. “They don’t” was his response.
“Oh” was all I could say. Brady was telling me this was more. It wasn’t just me feeling things beyond friendship. He was feeling them too.
“Can I call you tomorrow?” he asked, sounding unsure.
I wondered if Brady Higgens had ever been unsure about anything. “Yes.”
He moved away and climbed down out of his truck. I watched him as he walked around the front of his truck and came to open my door. He held out his hand to help me down, and I took it. Not because I needed it but because I wasn’t sure how well my legs were going to work now.
“Thanks for today,” I said, wanting to say more but so flustered I couldn’t seem to find the words.
“It was the best day I’ve had in a long time,” he replied.
I knew he wouldn’t kiss me out here. For the world to see. Even now, him walking me to my door was dangerous. If anyone drove by and saw him, he’d have to lie or tell the truth. I wanted him to lie. I wasn’t ready for this to end. Not yet.
“We will find some time tomorrow, then,” he said just as we reached the door.
I knew I couldn’t leave Bryony all day again, and I didn’t want to. “Yeah, I can get away for a little while. Maybe while Bryony naps.”
“Soon we can take her to the park together.”
I liked that he said that, but believing him was hard, so I just nodded.
“Good night,” he said reaching down to squeeze my hand before turning and leaving me there.