“I see.”
Glancing around the room, I make sure no one is near us before I continue. “I’m not normal. I’m not acting like someone who’s been…hurt. I…One minute I want to run away from him and the next…I’m drawn to him, but I can’t trust myself.”
“Evangeline, there isn’t a right way to act. How you react to situations is the true or right way for you. Anyone who tells you any different not only is a liar but has no heart,” she says fiercely. “Just because they wouldn’t do what you do doesn’t mean it’s wrong.”
“I know, but…I’m out of sorts. Lately, and I mean like in the past two or three days, I’ve been laughing again. Smiling, making friends, I think. I’ve been hugged and touched, and, for the most part, I didn’t want to run away screaming.”
“That’s wonderful.” Piper’s eyes light up. “It means you’re getting healthy and not letting the past control your life.”
“The guy?” Piper nods. “He asked me to dinner, but I said no and that I wasn’t looking to get involved with anyone.”
“Nothing wrong with establishing your boundaries.”
Grabbing the napkin in front of me, I begin to knead it. “Except I wanted to say yes.”
“Nothing wrong with that, either.”
Frustrated, I blow out a breath. “You’re not helping.”
“You asked me to listen, not tell you what to do,” she points out, calm as ever.
“What would you do?”
She smiles. “If you want to be around this guy, then do it in a place that’s very public and casual. So casual that it’s almost a non-date, you know? No pressure, no expectations.”
“But what if I’m wrong about him?” My lower lip trembles and it feels as though the room is closing in on me. “What if the next guy I pick is worse than Penn?”
Piper’s forehead wrinkles, then smooths out as she tentatively touches my hand. Her skin is so hot…or maybe it’s that mine is so cold. “What if he’s not?” she asks gently. “What if he’s a man who is deserving of your time and attention?”
“That’s a lot of what-ifs.” I take a sip of my tea while trying not to cry.
“I wish I could say for sure what kind of man this guy is and ease your mind.”
“You already know him,” I whisper, tears on the verge of falling.
“Who?”
“Hunter Sloan.”
Her eyes close as she gives my hand a small squeeze. “Oh, honey, he’s a good man. Hunter helps people; it’s his job.”
I laugh, but it’s bitter. “That was Penn’s job, too.”
“I’m sorry, Evangeline.”
“For what? You didn’t pick a loser like I did.” I sit back in my chair. “That was all me. After I fell for him, there was nothing wrong he could do in my eyes.”
“That’s normal. That’s called falling in love.”
“I’m not in love with Hunter.”
“Who said you had to be?”
I shrug. “I don’t know.”
Piper brushes a strand of hair behind her ear. “I know you don’t trust yourself right now, but the only way you’ll learn to trust yourself again is by attempting to do the things that terrify you.”
“Like going out on a date?” I ask, my voice all watery.
“Or even holding hands with a sympathetic friend.” She gazes at where our hands are still joined.
Five months ago, I wouldn’t let anyone near me, much less comfort me by touching any part of my body. Yet, here I am…I want to have a life again. I want to be normal.
Most of all, I don’t want Penn to win.
Lifting my gaze to Piper’s, I say, “If I get another opportunity, I’ll consider something…casual.”
Chapter 7
Hunter
My next on-duty shift keeps me busy for three days straight. I was so slammed with casework that I actually paid the college kid in apartment A to let Jake stay with him. No damn wonder I can’t have an actual pet, or a relationship, for that matter. With my work schedule, by the time I see Evangeline again, it’ll be the back of her head as she drives away.
Or something equally as bad.
“Ready to go?” I ask Jake, scratching his head. There is nothing I’d like to do more than crash, but I made Jake a promise to go see his honey at the dog park. While I can’t guarantee the little blond cocker spaniel will be there, I can, at least, deliver on my promise.
Jake’s tail wags like crazy as we make our way to the dog park. Another thing I like about Rose Haven’s location, it’s close to everything. Things have really changed in this part of Forrestville, and for the better.
Growing up, this section of Forrestville was considered the absolute wrong side of the tracks. A lot of the houses were abandoned; there was lots of crime and no jobs—hence, the lots of crime. People were afraid to let their kids play in the backyard, much less the front yard, but developers came in, worked with the locals, and have made amazing changes. I think the place looks like it did when it was first built out—all craftsman-style houses and neighborhood stores.
It’s a great place to raise a family now.