She didn’t know what to say. He was right about the Korean food she had on hand. It was all delicious, but she liked to put together plates for herself exactly the way he’d described. And there’d been more than one occasion when she’d skipped a meal because she’d been too into a book or too tired to fuss around with putting together her dinner.
There was something to be said about the food he was preparing, too. Especially because he was cooking for her. How many times had he heard her tell Boom how a person’s love went into the food they made for someone else?
Every conversation, every meal at Hope’s Crossing Kennels, she’d enjoyed for the company of the people there. But also because Brandon had always been around at the periphery.
She sat up straighter as he took the chicken from the oven and let it rest on top of the stove. “After you’re done, what are you going to do?”
He shrugged.
He hadn’t joined her and Lyn and Elisa earlier. But then again, their chatter didn’t seem to be something that interested him often. Even when she was visiting them at the kennels, Brandon didn’t often directly join the chatter.
But come to think of it, this was familiar. He was generally on the edge of her conversations. And they rarely hung out, just the two of them. But here he was now. Aside from nattering at him about what he was cooking, she couldn’t think of how to engage him in discussion. It was like they didn’t have easy conversation between them anymore.
“I can’t remember the last time we sat up and talked until dawn.”
Brandon paused. “I can.”
“Really?” The question came out softly. She didn’t know why, only that she wasn’t sure if this was exactly what she’d wanted to talk about either.
“It was before I left.” Brandon transferred a chicken breast to a cutting board and began slicing it. “We were talking about all the places you wanted to travel after college.”
Oh. Her cheeks heated at the memory. They’d talked and they’d done…other things. “You said I was weird because I didn’t want to stay in big hotels or resorts. I wasn’t interested in all the places our friends wanted to go for spring break.”
His kisses had been intoxicating back then, and teasing. He’d drawn out her hopes and dreams in between stealing her breath away. Maybe those kisses had changed now, but she had no way of knowing. And inside her own head, watching him, she wondered whether they had.
“You wanted to explore Ireland by traveling from one bed-and-breakfast to the next.” His voice took on an odd note. “You wanted to travel Japan by going from one onsen to the next.”
She smiled. It was true. Especially the Japanese onsens, because who didn’t want to slip into a hot spring and let all their tension soak away? She could use one now. “The places to stay and rest are as important as the destinations. I like the different ways someone can make a place a memory.”
And back when she’d shared those dreams with him, she’d wanted to make those memories with him. Then, he’d left. It hadn’t stopped her from dreaming, or traveling a bit, but on every trip she’d wondered what it would’ve been like to experience it with him there.
Maybe she should’ve been angry or bitter, but she’d burned all of that out of her system years ago. When he’d come back, she’d decided she wanted him in her life again, at least as a friend.
And that was all they were. Friends.
“You wanted to try the B-and-Bs on the Big Island in Hawaii and compare them to the places they have in the Caribbean islands.” He’d finished assembling the small containers, snapping each closed and stacking them neatly in her refrigerator. His movements were careful and precise. He did that when he was feeling strongly about something. “You were going to move far away from here.”
Well, that’d been the thought of the moment back then. He couldn’t be agitated about things she’d decided not to do, could he? “I traveled, but I didn’t want to move to any of those places. None of it was practical.”
She’d gone directly into undergraduate school, living at home to save money. When she’d graduated, she’d taken on internships and worked to earn her MBA. It’d been sensible and she’d come out of it with some student loans but not nearly as much debt as could’ve accrued if she’d gone away to school.
“Practical is a good thing.” Cooking utensils clanged as he made quick work of washing what he’d used. “Your knives need sharpening.”
“I have a knife sharpener in the drawer to your left.” She considered the dream she’d shared with him.
He didn’t mention the way they’d planned to explore those faraway places together. They’d spent hours negotiating, prioritizing which of the places they’d visit first.
And then, one day he’d just gone. He’d enlisted. She’d asked his parents and they had only said he’d been very sure he wanted to go.
She’d never known why he left, and she hadn’t asked when he’d come back to Pennsylvania.