A Thousand Boy Kisses

And he was staring at me. Crystal-blue eyes held me in their trap. I couldn’t have turned away even if I had wanted to.

Finally, I was able to find a breath, and filled my lungs with air. Like a jump lead, the action caused my heart to beat, to beat furiously under the stare of this boy. The one, that if I was being honest with myself, I still loved more than anything in the world.

Rune was dressed as he always had—black muscle t-shirt, black slim-fit jeans and black suede boots. Only now, his arms were thicker; his waist was toned and leaner, tapering in at his hips. My eyes traveled to his face and my stomach flipped. I thought I had seen all his beauty as he stood under the lamplight last night, but I hadn’t.

Older and more mature, he was quite possibly the most beautiful creature I had ever seen. His jaw was strong, perfectly defining his Scandinavian face. His cheekbones were prominent, but not in any way feminine, and a light dusting of blond stubble graced his chin and cheeks. The constants, I discovered, were those dark-blond eyebrows furrowed over his almond-shaped bright-blue eyes.

The eyes that even the distance of four thousand miles, and a timescale of two years, could never erase from my memory.

But that gaze, the gaze that was currently boring through mine, didn’t belong to the Rune I knew. Because it was filled with accusation and hatred. These eyes were glaring at me with unconcealed contempt.

I swallowed back the pain that was clawing up my throat, the pain of being on the receiving end of such a hard stare. Being loved by Rune brought the heady sensation of warmth. Being hated by Rune was like standing on an arctic ice shelf.

Minutes passed by and neither of us moved an inch. The air seemed to crackle around us. I watched as Rune’s fist clenched at his side. He seemed to be mentally warring with himself. I wondered what he was fighting inside. The look on his face grew darker still. Then, behind him, the door opened, and William, the hall monitor walked through.

He looked at Rune and me, serving up the excuse I needed to break free from this too-intense moment. I needed to gather my thoughts.

William cleared his throat. “Can I see your hall passes?”

I nodded and, balancing my books on a raised knee, went to hand mine over, but Rune shoved his in front of mine.

I didn’t react to his blatant rudeness.

William checked his pass first. Rune had been picking up his class schedule, that was why he was late. William handed back Rune’s pass, but Rune still didn’t move. William took hold of mine. He looked at me and said, “I hope you feel better soon, Poppy.”

My face paled, wondering how he knew, but then I realized the pass had said I’d been to see my doctor. He was simply being kind. He didn’t know.

“Thank you,” I said nervously and risked a look up. Rune was watching me, only this time his forehead appeared lined. I recognized his expression of worry. As soon as Rune saw me staring at him, reading him correctly, the worry was quickly replaced by the scowl he had previously worn.

Rune Kristiansen was way too handsome to scowl. A face that beautiful should forever wear a smile.

“Go on, you two, get to class.” William’s hard voice pulled my attention back from Rune. I pushed past them both, and rushed out through the far doors. As soon I was through to the next hallway, I glanced back, only to find Rune staring at me through the large panes of glass.

My hands began to shake at the intensity of his gaze, but then he suddenly moved away, as if he was forcing himself to leave me alone.

It took several seconds to gather some composure, then I hurried to my class.

I was still shaking an hour later.



*



A week passed by. A week of avoiding Rune at all costs. I stayed in my bedroom until I knew he wasn’t home. I kept my curtains drawn and my window locked—not that Rune would have tried to come in. The few times I had seen him in school he had either ignored me, or glared at me like I was his greatest enemy.

Both hurt in equal measure.

During lunch periods I stayed away from the cafeteria. I ate my lunch in the music room and spent the rest of the time practicing my cello. Music was still my safe haven, the one place where I could escape the world.

When my bow hit the string, I was transported away on a sea of tones and notes. The pain and grief of the last two years disappeared. The loneliness, the tears and anger, all evaporated, leaving a peace I could not find anywhere else.