Even the subject of abortion, which was in the newspapers often since President Reagan had vowed to make abortion illegal again in the United States, and which roused such passion in others, did not seem to inspire me. When I tried to imitate the words of Reverend Dennis, who preached against abortion as it was a slaughter of innocents, my words did not sound convincing though I knew them to be absolutely true.
It was told to us that the St. Paul Missionary Church like other evangelical churches through the United States was united in opposing what was called abortion on demand, as they were united in opposing socialism, communism, atheism, and homosexuality. There were legislators friendly to our cause in all the states, and many groups organized to take cases to the Supreme Court of the United States, to determine that abortion might be declared illegal once again, as it had been before 1973, and abortion clinics shut down. When I heard Reverend Dennis preach on this subject I felt my heart pound dangerously hard for the words slaughter of the innocents were terrible to contemplate; but still, when it was my turn to stand at a pulpit at the front of the room and “preach” on this subject in our class in Toledo, my voice quavered, and my knees, and I spoke so softly and so rapidly, Reverend Lundquist had to interrupt—“Luth-er! Slow down, son. Please.”
My face reddened. I dared not glance up to see the other students exchange smirking glances.
In this class my grade would be B-at the end of the term. I did not want to think that this was the lowest grade in the class of twelve students for it would make me envy and hate my classmates, and (kindly, white-haired) Reverend Lundquist (who spent much of the class hour reminiscing to us of his early days as a minister in the Methodist church, in Barnstead, Oklahoma), and this was upsetting to me as a Christian.
The old man will never recommend you for a pastorship. Even if you earn your degree. You may as well give up, right now.
Save on tuition, fool. Save on gas.
Luth-er!
In “The Minister’s Bible,” in reading Genesis, our instructor Reverend Dilts told us that the story of the Garden of Eden had taken place approximately ten thousand years ago; but one of the younger students questioned whether it was a greater time than that, like fifty thousand years—(so he seemed to have been told by some revered authority). Also, there were claims by “atheistic scientists” that human beings had not been created by God but were descended from apes and monkeys. Reverend Dilts told us heatedly that these were ridiculous ideas with no basis in Scripture.
In my notebook I took down these facts—10,000 yrs./50,000 yrs. Carefully I underlined 10,000 yrs. for this was Reverend Dilts’s figure, that would likely be on our final exam.
It seemed to be upsetting to others in the class, as to Reverend Dilts, that many Americans were coming to believe atheistic and socialist ideas as a result of public school teaching and science courses in the schools, more upsetting yet “sex education,” but I was too tired or distracted to feel strongly about these issues, and often woke startled from a light doze, embarrassed to think that Reverend Dilts might have noticed. (I am sure that Reverend Dilts did notice!) At such times I felt shame, and anxiety, that I was wasting my earnings on tuition at the school, and that Edna Mae would be crushed if I did not graduate with a diploma. My teeth chattered with a strange sort of cold, as if I was frightened, and once Reverend Dilts turned to me, with a quizzical look as if I had spoken aloud—“Luke? Excuse me—Luther? What do you think?”
What did I think? I had not been following the discussion closely. It was a week when we were fearful of Edna Mae being pregnant—again—and a week when both the children had infected ears—and a week when a customer had complained to our employer that some stairway carpentry work done by another man and myself was not what he had asked for, that might have to be torn out and done again. All that I could think was that the discussion in class had to do with atheism in the public schools, and a ban on prayer that was the fault of the Supreme Court (?) in Washington, D.C., that was the result of socialist influence on the judges (?). It came to me to say, “It is the will of Satan.”
These words leapt to my lips. I could not think of another syllable more.
Reverend Dilts spoke slowly: “‘The will of Satan.’ Yes. I think you are right, Luther. Just in my lifetime, since the presidency of Franklin Delano Roosevelt, the legion of Satan is gathering strength in the United States.”
A shiver ran through the class. It was possible, for I was light-headed from fatigue, to imagine the shadowy face of Satan at one of the windows of the classroom, grinning at the back of Reverend Dilts’s head, without the elderly man taking note.