“I can’t…”
I nod. “I know.”
“It’s all over the news.”
I sigh and press my cheek to his chest. “Yeah, Rachel told me. Apparently a nurse from here talked.”
“Of course.”
“What are we going to do, Noah? How is this ever going to feel okay again?”
He wraps his big arms around me and falls silent a moment. “I don’t know.”
“Me either.”
“All I know is the time without you was hell. I need you here with me, Lara. I can’t do this without you.”
“If that’s where you need me, that’s where I’ll be.”
“And when we leave?” he asks. I stiffen in his arms.
I hadn’t thought of that. We’re not going to be in this hospital forever. We both have apartments and jobs—and the very idea of going back to those alone terrifies me. What the hell are we going to do? A week ago we were nothing, now we’re something, but how much of a something are we? Are we going somewhere with this or are we taking it slow …
I decide to go with honesty and see where that ends up for me. “I don’t know how I can go home alone.”
He exhales shakily. “Neither do I.”
“So what do we do?”
“I want you to come home with me. My apartment is close to yours, we can go back and forth when we need to, but I want you with me, Lara. I can’t stand the thought of being without you again.”
“Then that’s what we’ll do.”
“I’ve got you in this, please know that. Nobody will ever touch you again.”
“I know that,” I whisper.
“Stay with me?”
“Always, Noah.”
He had my back when my nan died; now it’s my turn to have his. And I will, for as long as we’re both breathing, I’ll do everything I can to protect him as staunchly as he protected me.
Always.
THIRTY
“Can you tell us what it was like out there?”
“How did you get out?”
“How did you survive?”
“Did you kill him?”
“What did he do to you?”
Reporters, flashes from cameras, people everywhere. I’m stiff, feet planted firmly on the ground, refusing to move forward. Noah tugs my arm, using the other hand to push through the crowds of reporters waiting for us outside the hospital as we leave. It’s been a week. In that time, we’ve had our wounds treated, we’ve been interviewed by the police countless times, and Noah and I were able to visit each other in our rooms. We both decided to stay together at his apartment once we got out. Neither of us could stand the thought of being without each other again.
Now we hold hands and face the hordes of reporters clamoring for details. They’ve no doubt been waiting for us to come out so they can get the answers to their questions.
“No comment,” Noah growls, shoving through them until we reach the car waiting for us.
My dad gets out, opening the door and helping me into the vehicle. Noah jumps in the front and then we’re off. My heart is pounding and I drop my head into my hands and try to steady out my breathing.
“That’s going to happen for a while,” Dad says. “Are you two okay with all the fuss?”
“Yeah,” Noah mutters. “Lara, are you okay?”
I don’t lift my head from my hands.
“Lara, honey?”
I look up, tears running down my cheeks. Noah doesn’t hesitate: He unbuckles and climbs into the back. His arms go around me and he pulls me tight as I sob. I hate it. I hate all of this.
“It won’t be like this forever.”
“They’re vultures,” I sob. “They don’t care about what we went through at all.”
“No, they don’t. They just want a story.”
“We’ll keep you safe,” Dad says from the front. “I promise.”
I nestle into Noah’s chest the entire ride to his apartment. It’s quiet when we arrive, thank God. We climb out of the car and Mom and Rachel come rushing out, smiling and opening their arms for us. I rush forward and throw myself in, relishing in the comfort they’re bringing.
“The apartment is cleaned, stocked, and ready to go. You don’t need to leave for weeks if you don’t want to.” Rachel smiles, stepping back. She’s been a godsend this past week. Visiting me at the hospital every day and bringing me anything I needed.
“I’ve even put four apple pies in the freezer,” Mom adds with a smile.
“Thank you both so much,” I whisper, running a hand through my hair and looking up at the two-story apartment.
“It’s very much appreciated,” Noah says. “But would you mind if we did this part alone?”
“Of course!” Mom says, hugging him tight. “Of course.”
“Call us if you need anything,” Rachel says, hugging me again. She smiles at Noah and he nods to her.
Then they’re gone.
We stand at the front door, silently.
“Are you ready?”
“As I’ll ever be,” I whisper.
Noah reaches out and takes my hand. We step inside.
The apartment smells of freshly cooked pies and feels far homier than I would have thought. I look around. Since Noah and I both left our old apartment after we split, I haven’t seen his new place, but it’s nice. Modern, spacious, and filled with very masculine furniture. I walk into the large black-and-white-decorated kitchen and open the fridge. It’s full to the brim with premade meals and food.
I smile.
Bless them.
“Are you tired?” Noah asks, coming up behind me and wrapping his arms around my waist.
“Yeah,” I say softly. “So damned tired.”
“It’s been hard sleeping, huh?” he says, nuzzling my neck softly.
“I know it’s over, I’m so glad, but it’s still really hard to close my eyes and not wait for that sound.”
“It’ll go away, eventually. At least we’re out of that damned hospital.”
“I think that’s the worst part about escape, you know?”
He looks down at me, pressing a kiss to my forehead. “What’s that?”
“When you escape, you kind of just want time alone to recover. But people, they want answers. They’re everywhere. Doctors. Police. Then there are the hospitals.”
“I hear what you’re saying,” he murmurs. “But we’re here now, and not there.”
“And we have each other,” I point out softly, reaching up and stroking his jaw.
“So what do you say we go get some sleep, together?”
My heart flutters. “I would love that.”
He takes my hand and leads me into his bedroom. I stare at the familiar bed and my heart warms. We both strip down, removing our clothes. Then we climb into the bed and curl into each other. This is the only way we feel okay at the moment; for some reason, it brings us comfort. Probably because the only time we felt safe in that horrible place was when we were in each other’s arms.
“I love you, Lara,” Noah whispers against the back of my neck.
“I love you, too.”
And for the first time in weeks, I fall asleep thinking maybe, just maybe, things might be okay.
Maybe.
THIRTY-ONE