“He bought shoes. They’re too high to walk to work and around the library.”
“Then he didn’t do it right, but at least he has footwear awareness.” We start walking toward the coffee shop. “He must be some civil engineer to buy you Chanel and Gucci,” she comments.
She’s right, of course. This all seems extravagant for a civil engineer. “They did bring him in from Texas to design some highway, but maybe he inherited money like you did, too. We haven’t talked about it.”
“Hmm,” she replies. “Yes, well, I don’t use mine.” She glances at me. “I would—you know I would for you—but you would never let me throw my money at you. Interestingly, though, this man is another story. You’re letting him buy you things.”
“Not really,” I say. “He’s just rather dogmatic in his generosity.”
My mind hangs on that word, generosity, when I want to replace it with another, such as threats or demands.
“He must be,” she replies. “When can I meet him?”
Never, I think. I don’t want him anywhere near the people I love. “He wants to meet you,” I say. “We just have to work out the details.”
We enter the coffee shop and place our order before claiming a seat at a table. “You could bring him to my award ceremony,” Jess suggests, picking up where we left off in the conversation.
“You already know I’m bringing Jack after I attend his uncle’s wedding with him.”
“And how does this man of yours feel about Jack?”
“Order for Jess!”
She lifts a finger. “Hold that thought. I’ll grab our coffees.” She stands and disappears, out of sight and mind for just a moment.
I’m no longer numb. Fear and worry form a fist in my gut. How will Adam react to me attending the wedding and the party with Jack? Do I tell him? Of course I have to tell him. He knows. He always knows. Seeming to hide anything from that man feels dangerous. He knows about Jack. He knows he’s just a friend. And I’m not even sure Adam is really into me as a woman. It’s more like a protégé or submission. Maybe victim is a more fitting choice.
Jess rejoins me, setting my coffee in front of me. “Where were we?” she asks. “Oh yes. How will the new man—Adam, right?”
“Yes,” I confirm. “Adam.”
“How will Adam feel about you and Jack attending not one, but two, events together Saturday?”
“I’m not sure,” I answer honestly. “But I’m not letting Jack down.”
Unless Adam forces me to in order to ensure Jack’s safety, I think.
“I’m not surprised,” Jess replies. “As much as I don’t approve of Jack as your plus-one, I know you, and you are stubbornly committed to him.”
“And you,” I remind her.
“Yes,” she agrees. “Which is why I tolerate him.” She moves on before I can punch back on that one. “You and this Adam dude are new, so my advice you didn’t ask for: either don’t tell him about Saturday, or tell him and make it clear he has to deal with it or be gone. Don’t do what you did with Kevin and stand in the background. Set the rules up front. Demand your own identity. I mean, him dressing you is all fine and dandy—but I only somewhat approve.”
“Why? You love a man to break out his plastic.”
“I don’t like the way he’s creating your image for you,” she says. “He’s choosing what you wear. You should be choosing how you do you. You always have, and I respect that about you. So much so that every clothing item I have ever picked for you just hangs in your closet.”
“I wore the red sweater. You’re very sweet and generous.”
“Well then, on that note, stay over Friday night and pick a dress from my closet for Saturday night.”
“I have to go to the wedding early Saturday.”
“Fine then, I’ll come by Friday loaded down with dresses.”
“You don’t have to do that.”
“But I’m going to. What time? We can order in dinner.”
“I have no idea what is going to be going on with my father and Big Davis, so let’s chat about it Thursday.”
“Anything from him this morning?”
“Of course not. He’s already made up his mind. We’re going back on Lion’s Den.”
“We’re,” she repeats. “Because what happens to him happens to you. I do love that about you and your father. What’s up with your mother?”
I fill her in on the story. She listens intently and replies with, “Somehow it’s just so hard for me to perceive of your father having your mother investigated. There’s a side to him I don’t think we fully know. Or I don’t. Maybe you do.”
“I think the Lion’s Den situation just crashed his self-esteem to such a low level that he acted based on that insecurity. That’s why I can’t believe he would agree to go back on the show.”
“Honestly, I can’t, either. Just take the lesser money and make more over time.”
“I agree,” I say, “but as we talk about this, I can’t help but wonder if he is just so afraid of Davis that he thinks he’ll find a way to ruin any other deal, even after it seems over and done with.”
“Considering what I learned about him, I fear you might be right. I’m going to try to get an interview with him.”
“With what outcome in mind?”
“The power of the press, my dear, the power of the press. Plus, he’s supposed to be handsy. I sure won’t lead him on, but if he does that shit with me, I damn sure will confirm it to be true. You know how I feel about those kinds of men.”
Because of her father. More and more, I wonder if Jack is right. Maybe Jess will never trust a man enough to love him, but he’s wrong about her trying to get rid of him for herself. She supports my dating life. She supports me spreading my wings. “I don’t think we even have time to go down that path with Big Davis, Jess. And there really isn’t time anyway.”
“What date is your father in talks to be on Lion’s Den again?”
“I’m not sure. It’s some worst-failures edition.”
“Oh jeez.” She punches buttons on her phone and then glances at me. “Okay. It’s supposed to air live, late next month. That gives us a little time.”
“Not really. My father is going to feel the pressure and sign whatever agreement the attorney places in front of him.”
“Right. Of course he will.” She sips from her cup, a thoughtful look on her face. “Okay, I don’t know why we’re worrying. My attorney is his attorney. He’s not going to let him get screwed.”
“Do you know he has some you-look-alike newbie attorney named Erin helping him on this? I get the impression she’s highly involved, and I don’t know, Jess. Call me nuts, but she looks so like you, it’s a little freaky. Like maybe he has a thing for you that he’s using her to live out. Maybe shades of you in Erin has him blinded by the light.”
“That is an unexpected observation. I don’t get that vibe from him at all, but I admit, it sounds worrisome. I’ll call him. I’m on this, Mia.” She glances at her watch. “I need to run, but one thing before I do: it’s cool and all that you won’t let Jack down, that you stand by him, that you are always a good friend. I also think setting boundaries with this new Adam guy is good, and you can use Jack and Saturday to do so. But the elephant in the room we didn’t talk about this morning was your meltdown last night.”
“Oh yeah,” I say. “That.”
“Yes, that. Mia, you know I have always felt you being invisible is a choice. You chose to be seen and or not be seen. When you chose to be seen and it backfired yesterday, you came down hard on yourself. I still believe, and I have always believed, Jack is your security blanket. It’s easier to feel invisible together than be seen. Don’t let that comfortable feeling you two will have together on Saturday make being invisible feel safer than being seen. Don’t let Jack get between you and Adam. Don’t let Jack hold you back.” She lifts her hand in surrender. “No need to make your case. I’m done. That’s all. Just my opinion. Love ya, sister.” She squeezes my hand and pushes to her feet, and in a whiff of lingering perfume, she leaves me sitting there.
Jack is worried that Jess wants to keep him and me apart.
Jess is worried Jack will keep me and Adam apart.
I’m worried Adam is going to take everyone I love and just plain kill them.