She doesn’t bother to inquire about that one. “You know, when you two first walked in, I thought things had gone back to normal.”
“Why would you think that?” I ask, stealing a glance at Renner. He’s standing on Ollie’s deck, delighting in the attention.
“The way you guys came in holding hands, staring into each other’s eyes adoringly. It kind of looked like you wanted to suck his face off.” Her eyes are all starry and wistful.
I nearly gag. “Adoringly? No. That was a carefully planned act we agreed upon two seconds before walking in.”
She winks at me, crunching a celery stick loaded with ranch dip. “All I’m sayin’ is, you coulda fooled me. You looked blissfully engaged.”
I see what she’s getting at and I won’t be lured. “I won’t be marrying that man,” I say, holding stubborn.
“Suit yourself. But if I had someone who looked at me like that, I wouldn’t be in a rush to ditch them, even if I were trapped in an AU—” Nori stops, eyes widening over my shoulder.
When I turn around, everyone is staring at me. Renner is beside Ollie, waving me over.
“What’s going on?” I ask through clenched teeth, approaching tentatively.
“They want us to give a speech,” he whispers, tugging me by the hand.
Oh no.
My knees instantly weaken. See, I’m good at public speaking. Speeches are my bitch. But I cannot speak off the cuff. Speeches take planning. Forethought. Word-for-word memorization. I can’t cope without my color-coded cue cards.
Before I have the chance to spiral and run away, Renner kicks things off. “Char and I just wanted to thank each and every one of you for being here tonight. Especially Ollie and Lainey for generously hosting. It’s rare to have everyone we love in one place, but Char and I are so thankful to have you all in our lives.”
My fingers, which were locked tightly between his, loosen ever so slightly as he begins speaking with surprising ease. How is he so relaxed right now?
“To be honest, I’m just as surprised as you all are to be standing here tonight. As many of you may recall, Char hated me in high school. And I mean hated.” Everyone laughs good-naturedly as Renner gives me a wink. I swear his eyes are sparkling. “Many hours were dedicated to pissing each other off. I learned very quickly that there are three surefire ways to annoy Char. First, being tardy. In fact, half the time she’s not even satisfied with being on time. If you’re not early, you’re late. Second, singing the wrong lyrics with any ounce of confidence. Third, losing. She cannot stand to lose. Board games. Bets. Student council elections.” He lets that one linger, smirking at me when I shoot him a look.
“Shit. Thirteen years still too soon for that joke,” he says, garnering more laughs and a loud snort from Mom. “I’m shocked I’m still alive after that election. Anyway, I never really knew what started it all . . . and still don’t. I never told her this, but the truth is, I was in awe of her from the moment we met. She’s always the smartest, most driven, most beautiful person in any room. And maybe my teenage self felt intimidated.
“Either way, no one could get under my skin like Char. And she still does to this day, let’s be honest. There’ve been days where I thought I couldn’t stand her, but I found myself thinking about her when we were apart. All the time. Somehow, through all the fighting, she wormed her way into my heart.” He tightens his grip around my hand and looks directly into my eyes. “Ever since then, my life has been fuller, happier, and infinitely better with you by my side instead of against me. Together, we’re infinite. Beyond. And I think I just plagiarized Toy Story. But the point is, Char, I cannot wait to spend the rest of my life with you.”
The crowd goes wild for his speech. I’m having déjà vu of the applause after Renner’s student council campaign speech. Maybe Renner’s calling isn’t teaching gym. Maybe he should be a professional speechwriter. Or a motivational speaker.
I don’t know who started shouting “Kiss her,” though I suspect it was Ollie. But soon, everyone is cheering us on, clinking their cups, and demanding a kiss.
“Come on, give her a kiss,” Renner’s aunt yells, phone poised to capture the moment on video.
My eyes meet Renner’s, and we exchange a look that silently says, Shit. But then the corner of his lip raises in that signature smile and my breath hitches. My head whirls with a foreign feeling, something I don’t quite recognize.
“We don’t have to . . . if you don’t want to,” he whispers.
“Um, I—” He loosens his hand around my waist, sensing my reluctance. Every logical, rational part of me says that J. T. Renner is the absolute last person in the world I want to kiss. But not kissing him at our own engagement party, in front of all our friends and family, would only lead to suspicion. Right?
For a hot second, I’m entranced. Hoodwinked by his unnatural gift with words. By the way the orange sky has illuminated the tiny gold flecks in his green eyes like tiny, fiery beacons. I imagine I’m character in a movie. The main character who withstands a torrential downpour and subsequent pneumonia, all for that grand gesture. The character who throws caution to the wind and accepts another’s love.
And I do it. I kiss him.
FIFTEEN
I’ve kissed three guys in my life, but I’ve never been the kisser. The one who leans in and makes first contact.
And now I know why.
Renner isn’t expecting my lips to crash into him like a Mack Truck. As I close in, his eyes widen like saucers in abject terror.
But it’s too late. I’ve propelled myself forward with too much momentum. Our noses smash together, punctuated by the hard clank of my teeth against his upper lip. And there it is, the faintest metallic taste of blood.
Ouch.
Nonetheless, we’ve done it. We’ve kissed, at least in the technical sense.
“There,” I say through an epic sigh of relief, the tips of my fingers zipping with adrenaline as I pull back.
I expect anger or frustration for ruining the show. But instead, the corners of his eyes crinkle in amusement. “Was that . . . a kiss?” he whispers, eyes trained on mine, as though we’re the only people in this backyard. As if all eyes aren’t on us.
“I think so?”
He pulls me in and chuckles softly, chest rising against mine. “Somehow that’s worse than your hand-holding. You nearly knocked my teeth out.” He touches his front teeth, feigning concern that they’re still there.
If I had to kiss Renner, why did I do it so poorly? In front of a crowd, no less. He doesn’t have anything else to razz me about.
He leans in to try again, forehead grazing mine. From this angle, I can see the thick swoop of his lashes. The slight cluster of freckles dusting the bridge of his nose. The way his lips quiver as I inch closer.
He tilts his head to the left, running his thumb over my jawline to cup my chin, leaving me breathless. His lips slide into an earnest grin that nearly sends me adrift. It reminds me of that very first day of school. For that moment on the bleachers, I’d been charmed by his sunlight. His effortless smile. That intoxicating lemony scent.
I only realize I’m shaking when he squeezes my hand, which manages to slow the wild thrash of my heart.
Unlike me, he comes in slow and tentative. This is how it’s done, his body says, catching my bottom lip with a softness I didn’t know him capable of. His lips draw apart, then slide back together, a little deeper than before. His beard hair tickles the side of my face ever so slightly, lighting up every cell in my body. Our lips melt together seamlessly in a way I’ve never felt. Like opposites colliding. It feels safe, yet electrifying.
A part of me, a part I didn’t know existed, is desperate to pull him closer, run my fingers through his thick, silky hair, recapture his lips with mine. But he pulls back.
Before I can register what the hell just happened, he’s lapping up praise from the party guests. He shouts something to my mom that I can’t hear over my ringing ears.