Alive.
It was as if I were back in the Nile, swimming against the current, and disoriented. Not trusting my ability to know which way was up. I rubbed my eyes, my eyelashes were wet. It’d been nearly a year since I’d last seen her. Time had left its mark on her youthful face. New lines marred the smooth skin of her brow. I’d forgotten how much I resembled her. The same hazel eyes, the same tanned skin and freckles. I was her mirror image.
“I can’t believe—” My throat locked and I swallowed back a painful lump. “You’re here. Alive. All this time . . .” My voice cracked. A second chance with my family; I could hardly believe it. I don’t know what I had done to deserve such an extraordinary miracle. “Where is Papá? Is he coming, too?”
“Inez.” She clenched her eyes and used her hem to wipe her sodden cheeks. “He’s gone.”
I brought my knuckles to my mouth. The ground seemed to tilt under my knees. I cried harder, even as I heard my mother make more shushing noises. For a moment, I thought my world had been made right again.
“I’ve been destroyed by grief,” I said in between hiccups. “I never thought I’d see you again. How is this possible?”
Mamá caressed my cheek, her touch soft. “I never thought I’d see you again, either. I’ve dreamed of this moment even though it was impossible. You’ve grown so much, hijita.”
Her words sank into me, one by one. She hadn’t expected to see her only daughter again? Was she trying to tell me that she’d chosen to stay in Egypt forever? Is that why she let me think she’d died?
“I’ve missed you so much,” she whispered. “You will never know how much.”
My grief evaporated, and something fiery burned under my skin. “Where have you been?”
“Inez,” Mamá said again, trying to reach for me, but I shifted away.
“Where were you?” I whisper-yelled. “All this time, where were you?”
“Inez—”
My blood simmered, roiling hot in my veins. “Why didn’t you write? Why didn’t you come home?”
“I couldn’t,” she said. “It was too risky. There are very few people I trust, and I couldn’t guarantee that any letter would reach you untouched.” She smoothed the hair off my face. “I’ve been so worried about you. It killed me to have to stay away from you.”
“Too risky,” I repeated. “To write to your own daughter? I mourned you. I’m still mourning you.”
Mamá shut her eyes in resignation. “I’m begging you to keep your voice down.” She sighed and when her eyes opened again, they were haunted and terrified. “We don’t have much time, tesora. When I saw you arrive, I thought it was a mirage. What are you doing in Egypt?”
“What do you mean? I came to find out what happened.”
“I should have expected that.” Her face crumpled. “Lo siento. I don’t know how you’ll ever be able to forgive me. But I wouldn’t have done it if it weren’t important.”
Her words finally registered. “Wait a minute. You saw me arrive?”
“I’ve made camp on Philae in a secluded area, far from the temple.” She hesitated. “I’ve had help from the women in staying out of sight.”
“I don’t understand,” I said slowly. “You’ve been on this island the whole time?”
“Not the whole time.” She hesitated. “I’ve been in hiding.”
My hold on her tightened. “Hiding? From . . . from Tío Ricardo?”
Her mouth dropped open. “How did you know?”
“Know what?”
She leaned forward and cupped my cheeks. “Has he hurt you, Inez?”
I shook my head. “I found your letter.”
“My letter?” She furrowed her brow. “What letter?”
“The one you never sent to Monsieur Maspero. I found it in the hotel suite and read it. Mamá, why are you afraid of your own brother?”
Her face turned white in the dimness of my room. “Inez, you must go back to Argentina, por favor. The situation here is too perilous.”
“Yes, we’ll go together and—”
“No, you have to go without me. I can’t—I won’t leave until I finish what I started.”
“What is it? Tell me what’s going on. I’ve been frightened ever since coming to Egypt. Did Tió Ricardo hurt you? Did he hurt Papá?”
She brushed more of my tears away with the back of her hand. “Inez, your uncle has involved himself with an illegal smuggling trade of Egyptian artifacts. I’ve been trying to stop him, but he’s too well connected. He’s different, more desperate and—” Her voice cracked. “He’s not the brother I’ve known all my life. He’s changed, and I watched it happen.” Her face twisted. “I let it happen. This is my fault.”
My mind reeled. I recalled Maspero’s fear of the return of illicit auctions. But it sounded like they had not only returned, but the buying and selling of artifacts had been running rampant. My mother made a small noise at the back of her throat, and she looked so guilty my heart cracked.
“How could you say that?” I asked gently. “He’s a grown man.”
She turned her face away, her chest rising and falling with agitated breaths. I’d never seen her so discomposed, rattled, and nervous. My mother never let her emotions run away from her, at least in parenting me.
“Inez, when I come to Egypt, I—” She squeezed her eyes shut. “I act a little differently, and I’ve allowed myself more freedoms than I normally would while in Buenos Aires.”
I knew, instantly, what she meant. I remembered the more youthful clothes I’d found in the hotel room. I had wondered about them, at the different side of my mother I had never seen before.
“Go on,” I said softly.
“Your father and I let ourselves become distracted, and I was swept up in the grand adventure,” she said, her lips turning downward. “I knew my brother was toeing a fine line, but he assured me that he had everything under control, that he would never become involved with the set of people rumored to be involved in illegal activities. I ought to have paid better attention. I ought to have talked to him more, asked for help. Your father and I didn’t know what to do, so we did nothing.” She lifted her gaze, turned toward me. Her hair hung in dirty strands, framing a tight and narrow face. “I don’t know if I can protect you. I need you to go home, Inez.”
“I’m not leaving you. I won’t do it.”
Mamá shut her eyes, resigned. “Why I haven’t been able to curb your stubbornness, I’ll never know. Inez, this isn’t Argentina. I allowed you some freedom, but I won’t here.”
I took her hand. “I thought I lost you. Let me help you.”
She opened her eyes, visibly weighing what to say. “Do you know who your uncle hopes to find on Philae?”