He was giving her that look, the one that made her feel like he was cataloging her features, storing them away in his memory for safekeeping. Was it obvious that she was fantasizing about him as he sat right in front of her? He licked his lips. He had to know. How could he not?
“Lily . . .” Nick said quietly. That was it. Just her name. She leaned closer too, dying to know what he’d say next.
Then something crashed on the floor in the living room and everything went black.
“Oh shit, the disco ball!” Caleb yelled. “Party’s over, you heathens!”
Someone turned off the music and turned on the lights. Lily and Nick jerked away from each other. Nick stood and ran a hand over his face, then stuffed both hands in his pockets. Lily looked everywhere but at him. What just happened? She wasn’t imagining the moment they’d just had, was she?
Nick cleared his throat and she finally turned to him. He scratched the back of his neck again, a slightly panicked look in his eyes. “Are you ready to go? Should we go?”
“Yeah, sure.” She stood too, feeling slightly off-kilter.
“Okay, I’ll grab your coat.” He started to move, then paused. “Wait, what am I talking about? It’s July. You didn’t wear a coat.”
She forced a smile. “No coat.”
“Right. Let me, uh, go see if Caleb and Marcus need help cleaning up before we leave.”
Lily nodded, and Nick walked out of the kitchen. She stayed motionless for a moment to get her bearings. Her pulse had ramped into overdrive and she needed to bring herself back down to earth. No more getting physically closer to Nick. She obviously couldn’t be trusted in that regard. He didn’t want to date anyone, and she needed a date to the wedding. And more important, she wasn’t going to chase after someone who didn’t want to be involved with her. She just didn’t have the room in her heart to deal with another letdown after what had happened with Strick.
She’d do better to remind herself that there was a clear boundary between herself and Nick that shouldn’t be crossed.
She glanced into the living room and saw people standing by the door, hugging each other goodbye. Nick and Caleb were picking up the broken disco ball shards that littered the ground, and a very tall man with deep brown skin and long locs was walking toward her.
“Hey, you’re Nick’s friend Lily, right?” he asked. “I don’t think we’ve met. I’m Marcus.”
“Oh. Happy birthday!”
Marcus was even taller than Nick. Lily looked up, up, up at the kind smile on his face.
“Thank you.” Marcus walked past her and grabbed a box of trash bags from the cabinet below the sink. He came to stand beside her again. “Nice jumpsuit.”
“Thank you. I can’t take full credit, though. It’s my sister’s.”
“Well, in that case, kudos to your sister. She must have good taste in clothes.”
“Oh, for sure. She’s a stylist, so fashion is her whole life. She works with Karamel Kitty.”
Marcus squinted. “Is that the rapper who showed up at the VMAs in a bodysuit that said, ‘Eat my Kitty or Die’ across her crotch?”
“Yeah. That bodysuit is one of my sister’s proudest career moments.”
Marcus smiled and leaned against the table. “So how long have you been friends with Nick?”
“Not that long. Only a couple weeks, really.”
“Gotcha.” He nodded and pulled a trash bag out of the box. “He hasn’t told me much about you.”
“Oh.” She wasn’t sure what to say to that. “I’m his neighbor from across the hall. Um, I work in publishing too.”
“Really? Where?”
“At M&M, with Edith Pearson Books.”
Marcus raised an eyebrow. “What’s that like? I’ve never worked with Edith, but I’ve heard . . . interesting things about her.”
“I’m sure every interesting thing you’ve heard is true. It’s not the best, but I guess it could always be worse. I want to work in children’s books, actually.”
“Oh yeah?” Marcus’s face lit up. “I should introduce you to Francesca Ng. Francesca!”
The next thing Lily knew, Marcus was beckoning over a tall Southeast Asian woman who was wearing a bright purple minidress paired with white go-go boots. Her hair was dyed fire red and the sides of her head were shaved. Her style had an air of effortless coolness.
“Sick jumpsuit,” she said, pointing at Lily. She looped her arm through Marcus’s. “My Uber’s almost here. What’s up?”
“Francesca, this is Lily,” Marcus said. “She works on adult nonfiction but wants to work in children’s publishing. I thought you two should meet.” To Lily, he said, “Francesca is a senior editor at Happy Go Lucky Press.”
“Oh,” Lily said. Happy Go Lucky Press was an indie children’s publishing company that had been started by Anna Davidson, who used to be a vice president at M&M. Happy Go Lucky seemed to be acquiring the kind of inclusive children’s fantasy and sci-fi that Lily yearned to edit.
“Only you would turn your own birthday party into a networking event,” Francesca said, grinning at Marcus. She stuck her hand out to Lily. “It’s nice to meet you. We should get lunch or something sometime.”
Lily eagerly shook Francesca’s hand. “I’d love that.”
They exchanged emails and Francesca bid them goodbye. In the living room, Nick caught eyes with Lily and held up his finger, letting her know he’d be back to her in one minute. Lily nodded and ignored the inconvenient fluttering in her stomach. Marcus watched their exchange and his mouth turned up in a faint smile.
“Lily, can I share something with you?”
“Sure,” she said, turning to him.
“Nick would hate me for saying this, but he’s a lot softer than he likes to let on. It takes a while for him to show that side to people, if ever.”
She blinked. Why was he telling her this? “Okay.”
“If the two of you are getting closer, all I ask is that you be patient with him.”
“Oh, it’s really not like that between us,” she said quickly.
“I know, I know. But in case it does turn into something more . . . just remember what I said, okay?” Marcus was looking at her so closely, waiting for her response.
“Of course,” she said. “Yeah.”
“Thanks, Lily. It was really nice to meet you. Thanks for coming.”
Marcus walked away and joined Caleb and Nick in the living room, and Lily realized then that the main reason Marcus had introduced himself in the first place was because he’d wanted to vet Lily for Nick. Because he was trying to protect him. Because that was what friends did.
And she foolishly wondered if Nick would ever open up to her.
9
Once, when Nick was a sophomore in high school, he sat in the back of his seventh-period geometry class, staring at the equations on his exam, wondering if he’d ever need to apply the circumference of a sphere to a real-life situation, when his name was called over the loudspeaker.
Nick stilled and looked up. With the exception of the few times he’d been caught reading in class, Nick rarely got into trouble. He kept his head down and did his schoolwork. He worked evening shifts at Jack in the Box, and then he went home. Why was he being called to the principal’s office?