Erica vanished, and Claudia worried about her for a moment and then turned her attention back to the task at hand.
The team of four worked quietly, heads down. When she spoke to one of them their heads jerked up and there was a wariness in their eyes.
Expecting to be shouted at for something, Claudia thought. She’d been there, although whenever she’d been nervous or upset she’d never let the executive chef see it.
“Chef?”
It took a moment for her to realize that they were talking to her.
“Yes?”
“Do you honestly think we can do this without Chef Tucker?”
“I know we can.”
“If we pull this off tonight, it will be a miracle.”
Claudia reached for a skillet. “Then it’s a good thing it’s Christmas. It’s the perfect time for miracles. Now, let’s get back to work. Those carrots aren’t going to peel themselves.”
FIFTEEN
Anna
One of Anna’s favorite memories was of reading to the twins when they were very young. Sometimes she’d managed to engage both of them at the same time, and the three of them had snuggled in the bed, taking turns to flip the pages of the book. More often she’d taken one of them and Pete the other. Occasionally over the years, she thought back wistfully to that time and she thought of it now as she was snuggled on the sofa with Delphi, cocooned by tall shelves of books and warmed by the fire.
There was a tendency to only remember the good when you looked back, but of course there had been difficult days, too. There was a relentlessness to parenting young children that sapped energy from the most robust of people. There had been one memorable winter when the twins had been ill constantly, passing germs between them until Anna had wondered if they’d ever be well again.
Still, there had been a simplicity to those days that she missed. There had been no worries about the influences of friends, no staying up late until she knew the twins were home safe, no terror at the thought of one of her babies behind the wheel of a car.
For eighteen years they’d been under her roof and under her care. They’d been her focus, her life.
Next to her, Delphi had fallen asleep on the cushions and Anna closed the book they’d been reading together, wishing she could stop feeling this way. She had much to be grateful for, and the fact that her children were healthy and able to leave home and lead independent lives was one of them. She knew, deep down, that this wasn’t about them. Yes, she’d worry about them because that was part of being a parent, but it wasn’t worry about the twins that kept her awake at night. It was worry about herself.
She wanted to look into the future and be excited and motivated. She didn’t want to feel this slow, seeping sadness. She didn’t want to be counting down the days until they left home.
We could have another child.
Did she want that? There was something about that conversation she’d had with Pete in the kitchen that hadn’t felt quite right. She knew he didn’t really understand how she was feeling, and maybe it was unrealistic of her to expect him to. Still, it would have been good to talk properly about it.
She’d tried to call him earlier and he hadn’t answered, which was unlike him. Normally, whenever one of them was away, they enjoyed long phone calls.
She picked up her phone and sent him a quick message.
Everything okay with the kids?
The door to the library opened and Anna glanced up as Hattie came into the room.
Anna pushed her own problems aside. “How’s it going?”
“So far, so good, I think. I just wanted to check on you and Delphi. The couple from Ohio has dietary issues. Gluten free. I need to warn Claudia.”
Hattie looked like a person who had too much going on in her life. In her head.
“Claudia will already have thought of that. And you don’t need to worry about Delphi.” She glanced at the sleeping child. “We read two books, made up a story with Huge the dinosaur as the main character, then she told me everything she wanted for Christmas, and after that she crashed out. Should I have woken her? I know it’s a little late in the afternoon to let her sleep, but she seemed to need it.”
“She’s recovering from a cough and it has kept her awake,” Hattie said. “Let her sleep.”
Anna studied the shadows under her eyes. “I’m guessing that cough has kept you awake, too. I remember those days. And you’re on your own with it. That can’t be easy.”
“I’m fine.”
Anna reached for the soft throw draped over the back of the sofa and tucked it around Delphi. “I remember saying those words while screaming inside.”
Hattie gave a half smile. “I could do without all this extra pressure, that’s for sure.”
“Sit down for a moment.” Anna patted the sofa next to her but Hattie shook her head.
“Tempting, but if I sit down I might never get up again and there is so much to do. I need to check Erica is okay.”
“Is there a reason why she wouldn’t be?”
Hattie glanced over her shoulder as a guest walked past. “Are you going to catch the bookstore before it closes, Mike? Be careful. It’s icy out there. Call us if you need anything.” She turned back to Anna. “Erica is using the computer in my office to type up a menu, and then she’s going to do a job description so that we can advertise for a new chef.”
“She won’t need help with either of those tasks.” Anna almost smiled at the idea of Erica needing assistance.
“She’s been great,” Hattie said. “You all have.”
Anna debated whether she should say something about Hattie and Erica’s situation, and decided that a little bit of gentle interference was justified in this case.
“I know Erica didn’t handle the situation well earlier. I’m sure that upset you.”
“It doesn’t matter. I understand.”
“I doubt that you do.” Anna checked Delphi was still asleep. “I’m not generally considered a gossip, but there are a few things it might be helpful for you to know about Erica. The first is that she isn’t easy to know—which is why I’m giving you a crash course. The second is that once you do know her you’ll discover that she’s the kindest, most generous person you will ever meet. Not always tactile.” Anna saw the doubt in Hattie’s face and plowed on. “If you want a hug and a ‘there, there, poor you’ from someone, don’t pick Erica, but if you want someone who cares deeply for the people she loves and will offer any practical help within her power, then she’s your woman.”
Hattie hesitated and then joined Anna on the sofa.
“You three have been friends for a long time? You met at a book club?”
Anna smiled. “No, we met at college. Our book club happened by accident. It was our way of escaping from the heaviness of what we were reading. We were all stressed out from studying and exams and I became addicted to romance novels as a way of relaxing.”