I run my hand through my hair and squeeze the back of my neck. “I never planned any of this, Daisy. I made a mistake visiting her in San Francisco and setting all this in motion, but she stopped texting me and I was worried. I just want to keep her from being hurt, and if I tell her, it will hurt her.”
“And if you tell her, you won’t be able to go back to being Remington again once the stalker and tabloids are under control,” she says slowly. “That’s your plan, isn’t it? You’re just going to wait this out and then go back to being Remington as if none of this has happened.”
“I can’t see another way,” I admit.
“Or you could take a chance on love for once. Actually connect with someone, rather than pushing them away.”
“It’s not about love,” I say. “Whether she knows it or not, she’s my best friend. I want her happy and safe, and the best way to do that is to let her go.”
She shakes her head. “You have to tell her, Chase. Or I will. It’s not right or healthy what you’re doing. She deserves to know the truth. And regardless, you can’t go back as if none of this has happened. You won’t be able to forget this all. Nothing will be the same.”
Fuck. I close my eyes and know that she’s right. I can’t go back to Remington. After being with Olivia in real life, anything else would be a pale approximation.
And once she knows I’ve been playing this double life, she’s going to hate me, with good reason.
It’s been wrong to lie to her for so long. I’ve been so caught up in being around her. So unhinged at being able to spend time with her, that I didn’t just deceive her, I deceived me. There’s only one way this can end. And that’s badly. It’s not rational. But then again, I haven’t been rational since she sent me that text and her photo, telling me how she felt. I’ve barely been able to breathe.
I don’t know what the hell to do about any of it. How can I go back to life pre-Olivia, pre-Typewriter Girl? I have to figure it out, though. Olivia will eventually return to her peaceful life. And I can’t follow her there and drag the tabloids and trolls into her safe world.
I will tell her, to hell with the consequences, I promise myself. But I need more time with her before she inevitably hates me. And I need more time to keep her safe.
“I’ll tell her,” I vow to Daisy. “But not just yet.”
“When, then?” Daisy says.
“When the threat to her life is gone. If she finds out now, she might be angry enough to leave, and she’s safer here with me than she would be on her own in San Francisco.” I look at Daisy with pleading eyes. “I couldn’t live with myself if something happened to her.” My voice cracks with emotion. “Please.”
Daisy taps her long nails against the table. “Fine,” she says. “But as soon as there’s no more danger, she needs to know.”
“Agreed,” I say.
This is all coming to an end. At least I can build a few more memories and ensure she’s protected before she leaves for good.
CHAPTER 28
Olivia
There are many things I never imagined. I never imagined making out with Chase James. Or living in a mansion full of hot celebrities. I also never imagined that the first time I met Cassidy Reynolds, I’d be facedown, ass-up, almost naked, getting massaged by a very tall woman named Helga.
Life. It’s a constant surprise.
This is no luxury spa day. The massage is therapeutic because after all the running, roller-skating, and pole dancing, I can barely walk without tears. So, when Cassidy Reynolds saunters by, I’m lying on a massage table by the pool while Helga rubs my body all over until my aching muscles feel like jelly.
Helga gasps and pounds on my back a little too hard.
“Look! It is Cassidy Reynolds,” she squeals. I didn’t know a sound like that could come out of such a formidable body.
“What? Where?”
“There! Her legs! Her shoulders! Her perfect body alignment. I could give her a good massage.” she sighs.
I look up from the massage table and get a glimpse of what might be Cassidy Reynolds’s toned backside walking toward Chase’s bungalow. She’s wearing a white sundress and heels. The pleasure from my massage dissipates, and for the second time, I want to cry, this time not from muscle pain.
Helga pushes me back down, my face slamming into the little hole in the massage table. She enthusiastically goes to work on my other arm, rhapsodizing about the talented and beautiful Ms. Reynolds.
I shouldn’t feel so shitty. I already assumed Chase and Cassidy got back together. But I’ve ignored that inconvenient thought as best as I could because, for the last week, Chase and I have been hanging out more and more. We start the mornings with a run and eat breakfast together after we cool down. Then, he goes off to do whatever it is that movie stars do during the day, while I write and hang out with Daisy, and Emma when she’s on a break. But when he returns each night, whoever is around gets together to barbecue, have drinks, and hang out by the pool.
We even have a date night tonight. Not a real date, of course. He’s just helping me with my list and still refuses to let anyone else take me out because of “security risks.”
I’m not stupid; I don’t argue.
The more I get to know him, the deeper my crush gets. Since that first run, when we’re with the rest of the group, he’s often next to me. And maybe it’s my imagination, but even when we aren’t physically close together, our eyes meet from across the room. He touches me often, and with each brush of his shoulder or pass of his hand, I break out in full-body shivers, remembering that one night we had back in San Francisco. Oh, I remember that night to the point of obsession, to the point of forgetting everything else, especially the role of Cassidy Reynolds in his life.
But here she is, and I can’t ignore her presence any longer. I can’t be jealous—well, I am, but I shouldn’t be. And I can’t help wonder if Cassidy knows that Chase is taking me out tonight. Maybe they are only back to casually dating, or maybe they have an open relationship. I’ll never understand Hollywood. If Chase were mine, I’d never share.
An hour later, I’m done with my massage and having iced coffees at a poolside table with Daisy and Emma when Cassidy walks past again, returning from the path to Chase’s cottage.
“Hi!” Cassidy says with a friendly wave as she approaches us.
The worse part is she seems nice.
Emma looks up from her laptop.
“Hey, Cassidy! I haven’t seen you in forever!” Emma rises, and she and Cassidy do the LA air-kiss thing.
“Cassidy, this is Daisy and Olivia,” Emma introduces.
Daisy smiles. “Hi! I loved you in It Takes Two. That was such a great movie.”
“Thanks,” Cassidy says, a warm smile lighting up her beautiful face. Ugh. Why can’t she be awful?
“Chase has mentioned you both. It’s so nice to finally meet you,” the star says graciously, giving me a once-over.
He’s mentioned me to Cassidy? I wish I could ask more, but there’s no graceful way to insert that into the conversation.
Daisy and Cassidy exchange pleasantries while I paste a fake smile on my face and search for any flaws. But there aren’t any. I’m gutted. She’s nice, beautiful, and pretty much perfect for Chase.
“I wish I could stay longer, but I have a date I’m already late for,” Cassidy says, looking at her watch with a frown.
Date what? Maybe she just means an appointment.
“Ooh, anyone interesting?” Emma asks before Cassidy turns to leave.
Bless you, Emma, you nosy wench.
“It’s in the early days, and we’re keeping it private, but he shows some promise. I’ve decided I need to get back out there. It’s been too long.”
“But—I thought you were back with Chase,” I blurt out.
Cassidy tilts her head, frowning, her eyes speculative. “I’m not seeing Chase. At least, not for real, not for years. We still get photographed together and our publicists fan the flames, but that’s just PR. I thought that—” She stops herself.
Daisy and Emma look from me to Cassidy, then back to me, as if they’re watching a ping-pong match.
“But I heard… He said…” I trail off, trying to think.