His words were a balm. I often doubted that I was enough for Cady. That I could be all she needed.
Our eyes locked and held for a beat, then two. An understanding swirled between us.
“I’m going to talk to Lawson about everything this morning, but I’d like to loop Holt in, too,” Roan said, making a swift subject change.
I jerked upright. “No.”
He lifted a brow. “He’s still part owner of Anchor Security, his company back in Portland. He can get an amazing system in place here in no time. And he can do recon on Steven and Tyson.”
I shook my head rapidly. “I don’t need a security system, and after everything with my car, I sure as hell can’t afford one. And Law can look into the podcasters.”
“Holt will keep it to himself.”
“I don’t want anyone else to know. It’s hard enough that you’re going to tell Law. I just—it makes people look at me differently. And the more people who know, the easier it’ll be for it to get out, even if they don’t mean to slip up.”
It was already sending me into a panic that Roan knew. The fact that he was so quiet helped. He wasn’t a chatterbox. Didn’t get loose lips.
Roan sighed. “Fine. We’ll start with Law.”
“Thank you,” I breathed.
His steely blue gaze met mine. “Just want to make sure you’re safe.”
My breath caught in my lungs. I couldn’t inhale or exhale. I’d wanted that for so long, someone to care what happened to me. If I lived or died. If I was all right. And here Roan was, handing that care to me as if it were the easiest thing in the world.
The gift was dangerous. Because all I wanted was more.
17
ROAN
Gravel crunched under my tires as I pulled to a stop in front of the hillside house. It looked complete from the outside, but I knew from talking to Holt and Wren that they still had a ways to go on the inside. That finishing work could take forever.
It was early, but a couple of the construction crew’s vehicles, and Holt’s fancy-ass SUV were around. I turned off my truck and hopped out.
Holt was talking to his friend, Chris, who was also the contractor on the project. He glanced at me with a grin. “What do you think?”
“Looks good.”
Holt shook his head, a smile still in place. “He’s so verbose.”
Chris chuckled as he extended a hand to me. “How ya doin’, Roan?”
“Good.”
Chris just grinned wider. “I’ll see you inside, Holt.”
Holt sighed as he turned to me. “You know, most people ask how the other person is.”
My brow knitted. “I hate small talk.”
“I’m well aware.” He shook his head again. “So, what’s up that required a seven a.m. meeting?”
I toed a piece of gravel with my boot. “You still got the hookup with Halo security systems?”
Holt’s eyes flared. “Sure. Anchor uses them for all our jobs. I can call Cain if I need to place an order for components. What do you need?”
I hesitated for a moment. “I want to put in a system at Aspen’s.”
That grin was back on Holt’s face, but it was more mischievous this time. “You two seem to be spending a lot of time together.”
“It’s not like that. I’m just helping her out with a few things. She’s a good woman.” Too good for the darkness that swirled around me.
Holt’s smile slipped. “Everything okay?”
I jerked my head in a nod. I wouldn’t tell Holt without Aspen’s go-ahead. I couldn’t do that to her. “She just lives a ways out of town. Has a kid. She should have a system.”
“You’re right. I can call and get the order in today.”
“Send me the bill,” I told him.
Holt arched a brow.
I sighed. “She can’t afford it. You know it’s no big thing for me to cover it.” It wasn’t for any of us. The fact that our dad had sold his outdoor gear company had left my siblings and me with healthy trust funds. And I never knew what to do with mine.
He clapped me on the shoulder. “I’ll get the parts at cost and help you install.”
“Thanks.” I shifted on my feet. “Keep this between us until I can tell Aspen.”
Holt barked out a laugh. “You didn’t ask her if it was okay?”
I worked my jaw back and forth. “She didn’t seem all that open to the idea.”
“I’d better get started planning your funeral.”
I scowled at him. “It’ll be fine.”
He just grinned. “Whatever you say.”
“I gotta go meet Law,” I grumbled.
“Hope to see you alive later,” Holt called as I headed for my truck.
I ignored him.
Then he shouted again. “I love the pink glitter nails, by the way.”
My family were a bunch of assholes. Lovable assholes, but assholes all the same.
I climbed behind the wheel and headed down the gravel road. It only took me a few minutes to make it into town. Since it was early, I snagged a spot in front of the police station.
The young officer behind the desk looked up and swallowed hard as I walked in. “Morning, Mr. Hartley.”
I jerked my head in a nod and headed for the bullpen. Wren stood in the dispatch area, stretching her back and rubbing her pregnant belly. Concern washed over me.
“You okay?” I asked, voice low.
She turned with a smile on her face. “I’m good. Apart from the fact that this little girl feels the need to kick me in the kidneys every five minutes. I’m predicting a soccer player.”
A small smile curved my mouth. “An all-star, for sure.”
Wren laughed. “What are you doing here?”
“Got a meeting with Law. He in yet?”
She nodded. “In his office.” A concerned look passed over her face. “I’m worried about him. I don’t think he’s sleeping much. He needs help.”
I didn’t think so either. Between a rash of tough cases and raising three kids alone, he was up against more than his fair share of a load. “I’ll try to talk to him.”
Wren let out a huff. “Good luck with that. Every time I try, he brushes me off.”
I squeezed her shoulder. “You’re a good sister-in-law.”
Her eyes gentled. “Not yet, but soon.”
I chuckled. “Fair enough.”
Turning from dispatch, I maneuvered through the sea of desks and headed toward Lawson’s office. Nash looked up from his box of donuts. “What are you doing here?” he asked through a mouthful of pastry.
I grimaced. “Don’t speak with your damned mouth full.”
Nash rolled his eyes and swallowed. “Priorities.”
And that would always be food. I moved to take one, and he smacked my hand.
“I’ve only got half a dozen,” he clipped.
“You’re gonna get heart failure at forty.”
Nash leaned back in his chair, patting his stomach. “Never. I’m fit as a fiddle.”
I just shook my head. “I gotta go talk to Law about a case.”
“Let me know if you need the real MVP in there with you. I’ll have it solved in no time.”
I snorted and headed for the chief’s office, knocking on the closed door.
“Come in,” Lawson called.
I opened the door and stepped in, closing it behind me.