“Ace was gone for two days, and when he came in, he gave me a look,” Shelby explains, and I have to say I don’t think I have ever lost my head about someone that just one look did it. Liar, my head yells. With Matthew, one look was all it took, and you were either down on your knees or pushed up to a hard surface, fuck, any surface. We did it in the closet of a restaurant once because he kissed my neck and told me I was fucking beautiful in my ear. “Anyway,” Shelby says, “how was he?”
“It was fine,” I repeat. “He was fine. It was just we didn’t really have much in common.”
“You don’t have to have anything in common to get the D,” Clarabella says and the other two agree with her.
“Ugh, fine,” I concede, throwing my hands up like waving the white flag. “It was dull. He was nice, but I swear to God, I think I would have had a better time watching paint dry.”
“What did you tell him?” Shelby asks and I literally bang my head on the table.
“Oh, you didn’t tell him,” Presley says softly, and I just shake my head.
“What was I supposed to say?” I ask them when I finally put my head up. “It’s not you, you are really a nice guy.” I look at them and they must know I’m not finished. “That’s the shittiest thing to say.”
“Not if it’s the truth,” Clarabella states and now we all glare at her. “Hey, I’m a fucking unicorn, so it’s never me, it’s them.”
“I don’t think you should give up that easily,” Shelby says, “maybe he was nervous.”
“Yes, maybe he’s dull outside and a freak in the bed,” Clarabella adds, and I just look at her, my eyebrows going up and down. “What? It sounded like a good thing to say, but he probably just does it missionary.”
I close my eyes. “I don’t even want to know.” I get up. “I’m going to call him later.”
“Or ignore him,” Presley urges.
“That worked great for you.” Shelby gets up laughing. “Didn’t you just have his second child?”
“I didn’t ignore him,” she says, avoiding looking at anyone. “I was busy.”
I can’t help but laugh before I walk out of the room and go to my office. The vase of carnations is on the side of my desk. I pick it up and walk out toward the kitchen with it. “Who died?” Presley asks when I walk by her office.
“He brought me these before the date,” I throw over my shoulder, and she gasps out loud.
“You should have led with that before,” she says, laughing. “I would have pretended I was vomiting in the bathroom before we even left.”
I put the flowers on the counter in the kitchen before going back to my office and starting my computer. I scan my emails, surprised I don’t have any from Helena with her questions on the flowers. Every single time we’ve had a meeting, she emails me at least five times with different questions.
I answer a couple of emails from new clients and set up five meetings for the following week. The girls head out to have lunch and I opt to just work, hoping I can get things done so I can go visit the family for the weekend.
The bells ring, alerting me that someone just walked into the office. I get up and walk out with a smile on my face that quickly fades when I see who is standing there. “Hi,” I say to Matthew, folding my arms over my chest. A chill runs through me. “Is everything okay?”
He is in his track suit again with that stupid baseball hat backward. Why is that so hot, like why? Oh, I know why, because he used to wear it like that all the time so he could kiss you without it banging your forehead, that’s why. “Yeah,” he huffs, and I don’t know why something seems off. “I came to give you this.”
He holds a white envelope in his hand and for the life of me my hands stay stuck to me. “You can take it,” he urges me.
My hand slowly reaches up to grab the envelope, my stomach burning when I think it might be a letter he’s written to me since I won’t give him the time of day. My name is written in the middle of it with a line under it. I turn it over in my hand, trying not to make him see that my hand is shaking. I see the top of a check when I open it and I don’t know if I’m disappointed that it’s not a letter or happy. “That is a check,” he says when I pull it out and see that it’s a check for the whole invoice of services, “for your services.”
“Umm,” I say, looking down at it. “You don’t have to pay for the whole thing now,” I tell him. “I know you are good for it.” I look up, trying to make a joke, but everything about this feels off. Every time I’m alone with him it feels off. Like there is this huge-ass elephant sitting in the room and we aren’t talking about it. But said elephant feels like it’s crushing my chest.
“Actually,” he says, and I finally look into his eyes, “I’m also here to tell you that the wedding is off.”
The minute he says the words, my ears start to buzz. “Excuse me?” I say shocked, thinking maybe I heard wrong.
“I don’t know if there were deposits made on any other things,” he continues, ignoring my question. “If there is anything, I will cover that also.”
I am at a loss for words, and I have no idea what to say. I keep looking at him, then down at the check and back up at him again. My mouth is going so dry I don’t even think I would be able to swallow cold water. “Sofia,” he says in almost a whisper.
I blink away the tears stinging my nose and my eyes as I look up at him, his eyes so dark blue it looks like the deep end of the ocean. You know when you go far out to sea and the water gets darker and darker, that is exactly what it looks like. I’m about to say his name when the door opens. Both of us look over to see Charles walking in with two coffees in his hands. He looks at me and smiles. “I’ll go,” I hear Matthew say, my eyes go back to look at him as he nods at me. He turns to walk out the door, nodding at Charles at the same time.
“I’m sorry,” Charles says, laughing nervously, “it seems I really don’t have good timing.” I try not to let what just happened get to me, but I can’t help it. All I can hear is the wedding is off. “I was in the neighborhood,” he explains, coming to stand in front of me, “and I thought I would drop off some coffee.”
I force a smile on my face because if not, I know my parents would kick my ass if I was rude. “Thank you,” I say, reaching out and grabbing a cup from him.
“I got this one for you also, not knowing if you wanted regular milk or oat milk,” he says of the other cup of coffee in his hand.
“That is very kind of you,” I tell him, grabbing the other one.
“I was also wondering if you were free tonight?” he asks, putting his hands in his pockets, and I can’t help comparing how different he is from Matthew.
“I’m sorry, I’m swamped all week,” I tell him. “And then I’m going home to see the family this weekend.” He looks at me awkwardly. “But how about I touch base with you next week?”
“That sounds perfect,” he replies, his face filling with a smile. “I’ll let you go.” He leans in to kiss my cheek. “Have a great time with your family,” he says, turning and walking to the door.
“Thank you,” I tell him, “and for bringing me coffee.” He leaves, and I let out a huge sigh, walking back to my office. Sitting down, I put the coffee to the side before looking back at the check, my name written in the comments section. I hear the girls walk back into the office and get up going to Shelby’s.
She is sitting down reading something on her computer when she looks up. I put the check down in front of her, not saying anything to her. She looks down at it, then picks it up and looks at me. “What is this?” she asks.
“That is the check from Matthew and Helena’s wedding,” I say, trying not to freak out, “that has just been cancelled.”
matthew