“When I told them I wouldn’t have an abortion or get rid of it, things changed in a way I never
thought they would. I mean, these were my parents. I knew they were mad, but I figured they would come around. They didn’t.” I blink away the tear that comes, screaming at myself , I will not shed a fucking tear for them. “It seemed that all payments were stopped, and I didn’t know. I owed a little over fourteen thousand dollars for the following year. When I called my father, he didn’t answer me, and my mother ignored my phone calls and even my text messages.” I thought I had buried how I felt about it, but having to tell him, all the memories of back then come out like the box has been opened again. “I couch surfed for two months.” I don’t add in why I had to couch surf. Who wants to admit that their own family put them out on the street? That they stopped paying their rent and got them evicted? “Luckily for me, when I started school, I got a part-time job, and my parents would give me an allowance that I didn’t always spend. So while I worked full-time, I was able to save up for my own place at the three-month mark. Right when I turned six months.” He doesn’t say anything to me.
All I hear from his side is him hissing. I smile sadly.
“It all worked out. I have an amazing job now, and hopefully, I can get some clients of my own.”
“I have no doubt you’ll get them,” he encourages me, and it’s been a long time since someone has been in my corner encouraging me. The feeling is almost foreign to me at this point.
I hear the sound of feet coming my way before I see her standing in the doorway. “Mommy.” She rubs her eyes with her fist. “Can I have some water?”
“Of course, angel face.” I toss the covers off me. “I have to go,” I say into the phone.
“See you tomorrow,” he says softly.
“See you tomorrow,” I repeat before I disconnect the phone, tossing it on my bed before I make my way over to Avery and stop in front of her. “Did I forget to leave your sippy cup next to your bed?” I ask her, knowing with everything that happened with Stefano tonight, my whole nightly routine was shook up.
“It’s not there,” she mumbles to me.
“I’ll go get it, you go get back into bed,” I tell her. She turns and walks slowly back to her bed as I make my way to the kitchen. I grab her pink sippy cup from the dish rack before walking over to the fridge and pulling it open to grab the jug of water. The pizza boxes are stacked on the bottom shelf, filling it up. He moved everything around to make sure that it all fit. I don’t even look in the brown bag next to the boxes. I just grab the water jug, fill up her cup, and close the top. I take a sip of the water through the straw to make sure it’s on properly before I walk back to her room.
She’s back in bed in the fetal position. “Avery,” I say her name softly, wondering if she’s still awake or if she fell back asleep.
She stirs the minute I say her name, looking up at me. “Yeah,” she mumbles before sitting up in the bed. I sit down next to her and hand her the cup. She takes it in her hand and brings it to her lips with closed eyes. The pizza must have been really salty because she almost finishes the whole cup in one go. She hands it to me, trying to catch her breath before lying back down and pulling the covers over her. I walk back to the fridge and fill the cup back up before going back over to her and placing it
beside her pillow like I do every night. The sound of her soft snores fills the room.
I lean down and kiss her cheek. “Love you,” I tell her softly, before I walk back to my bedroom.
Grabbing my phone, I pick it up and put it on the bedside table before I slide into bed again. I’m just laying my head on the pillow when the phone rings, and I see it’s him again. “Hello,” I answer softly.
“Hey, sorry, it’s me again,” he says, and he sounds like he’s out of breath.
“Yes,” I reply, not sure why he’s calling me again.
“I’m going to tell my parents.” He comes right out and says it as a declaration. I almost laugh because he sounds so serious and nervous all at the same time.
“I figured.” I can’t help but chuckle now.
“I kind of have to tell them before Matty lets it slip.” He lets out a big exhale. My hands get sweaty realizing that Matty knows. I figured he would know because of Sofia, but knowing he knows is just cementing that this is actually happening and it’s not all in my head. “If I don’t tell my mother, and she finds out from Matty, she’s likely to castrate me.”
I can’t help but laugh out nervously. “Might as well tell them, then.” I put my hand on my stomach as it decides that it’s going to go straight up to my throat like a wave in the middle of the ocean.
“I’m sorry you went through all that alone,” he says to me, his voice going soft, and I close my eyes again, and I breathe out through my mouth softly. “I don’t know how, but I’m going to make it up to you.”
I shake my head. “There isn’t anything to make up for.” I open my eyes and look over to the doorframe where she just stood not too long ago, her small hands rubbing her eyes. All I can do is smile. “I would do it all over again for her.” My voice trembles. The silent tear escapes. “She’s the best thing I’ve ever done. Hands down, the best thing that I’ve ever done.”
“Thank you.” His voice sends shivers down my body, which is crazy since the last time I felt like this was the first time he leaned over and kissed me. There in the middle of the diner, with people coming and going, no one paying attention to the two people in the corner. No one knowing that night would change everything.
“For?” I ask him, not sure what he’s thanking me for.
I know I’m also not ready for what is to come. I’m not ready for his words to come out. There is nothing that can prepare me for what comes next. “Being the best mother to our kid,” he says with a chuckle. I picture him smiling with a smirk that I’ve seen for the past four years growing on our daughter, always mesmerized she got it, even though she never met him. It was a piece of him she got without knowing. “She’s the best, and it’s because of you.”
stefano
. . .
I know I should tread lightly and go at it slowly, but I don’t know what it is about Addison that just makes me forget everything I have instilled in me. Every single rule I have in place is just suddenly erased and there are no rules when it comes to her. No one-night stands, that was crossed off the list. No strings attached, keep things at arm’s length. But again, with her that night all I could do was push all those little nagging comments to the back of my head. All I wanted was to kiss her. There in the middle of the worst diner food I had ever had, all I wanted to do was hold her face and kiss her.
I kept ordering food only to drag out the time we spent together. I kept ordering the food until I finally got the courage to ask her what I was dying to ask her the second she bumped into me and looked into my eyes. I honestly think the world stayed still for that moment. “She really is the best kid,” Addison agrees, and I can even hear the smile in her voice.
“Okay, I should call my parents and get it over with.” I take a deep inhale. “Wish me luck.”
“Hope it turns out better than it did with mine,” she says. I know she’s trying to make a joke out of it, but my hands clench into fists. From the little she told me, my blood is boiling, and I know I want to sit down with her and for her to tell me exactly what happened. However, couch surfing for two months was enough to make me see red or black or whatever color someone sees when they are about to lose their shit.