He keeps his hands on my ass; my eyes close and my body spasms violently. And then, thankfuckinggod, I come so hard that I let loose a scream that sounds more Agatha Christie murder mystery than Fifty Shades of Gray.
Whatever. I’ve earned this orgasm. I’ll celebrate it however I damn well please.
I grip his neck, my lips resting against his forehead as I come down from the high. There’s an unsettled unfurling in my stomach that I can’t quite decipher.
Could it be that we’ve had unprotected sex for the third time in a row?
Could it be that the hole I’ve had inside me since Ziva’s death feels smaller than it’s ever been?
Maybe it’s how I’m starting to realize that, as much as I may want this man, I know deep in my bones that I can’t have him.
Or maybe it’s that, despite all the reasons I should’ve hopped that fence again and ran screaming for the hills…
I still don’t regret staying.
33
URI
“Say that again.”
I throw Alyssa a disbelieving glance while she giggles. “I’m serious. He wanted to learn.”
“He wanted to learn how to knit?” I repeat. “Lev. My brother?”
She gives me a satisfied smirk. “Mhmm. He walked into my room yesterday while I was knitting and he was really interested. So I’m starting classes tomorrow.”
My first thought is, He’s just walking into your room now? Instead, I shake my head. “I’ll have to see that to believe it.”
She shrugs. “He may like it; he may hate it. But I think it’s a positive sign that he wants to try something new.”
“The little suck-up doesn’t want to try something new. He just wants to be close to you.”
Can’t really blame him.
“I know,” she says softly. “I enjoy spending time with him.”
As I drive into the estate, I notice a car parked just outside on the turntable.
Fuck.
“Uri, I just wanted to thank you for taking me out tonight. I know that…”
She keeps talking but I’m not listening anymore. I’m staring at Niko’s silhouette, leaning against the entrance wall that leads to the house. Of course he opted to stand outside and wait for me. He wanted to know exactly what I was up to.
Alyssa seems to have caught on that something’s up because she’s stopped talking. Instead, she’s looking at me curiously. “Uri? Something wrong?”
“Everything’s fine,” I say in a voice too brusque to be believed.
I park haphazardly on the drive and get out of the car. Alyssa follows me towards the house in silence. I can see her adjusting her dress from my peripheral vision. She looks like a woman who’s been recently ridden hard and put away wet—which, to be fair, is accurate.
“Little brother,” Nikolai greets in an amused murmur.
When I stop in front of Nikolai, Alyssa stops next to me. I give her only a cursory glance. “Go to bed. The evening’s over.”
She flinches instantly, hurt pooling in her eyes so fast that I want to kick my own ass. She glances at Nikolai, then back at me. Then, with a clenched jaw, she enters the house.
My brother watches her walk away the whole time. As much as I would like to, I don’t stop him. Purely because I know that’s exactly what he wants me to do.
Only when she’s disappeared does he turn back to me with raised eyebrows and a knowing expression. “She’s pretty.”
I roll my eyes, trying to look less guilty. “I told you I would come to you.”
“And I can see why. Did the two of you have a nice evening?”
I push past him and head towards my office. My good mood has just been reduced to ash in a matter of seconds. I don’t speak again until we’re in my office and I’ve got a glass of vodka in my hand.
“Are you going to tell me what’s going on?” Nikolai asks, breaking the silence.
I take a sip of my drink. “What’s going on is that Boris needs a little—”
“No,” Nikolai interrupts sharply, “I’m not talking about Sobakin. I’m talking about your pretty little prisoner.”
I clench my teeth, but my answer still comes too fast and too insistently. “Nothing’s going on there.”
Nikolai scoffs. “Come on, brat. You dressed her up and took her out for dinner? Not to mention that she’s living in the house now, in one of the guest bedrooms?”
“It was necessary. Lev was getting antsy and I didn’t want to push him towards a full-scale breakdown.”
Nikolai’s eyes go wide. “So Lev knows about her?”
“He broke into the basement and found her. It was out of my hands.”
“And Polina?”
“Pol has no idea. Which is why, on the weekends that Polly’s here, Alyssa’s going back down into the basement.”
“What if Lev lets slip?”
I grit my teeth. “I’ll cross that bridge when I come to it.”
“That seems to be the party line these days.”
Mother used to say that Nikolai and I were too alike and that’s why we butted heads all the time. These days, I think it’s more because he’s a condescending prick.
He’s not finished yet, either. “Tell me honestly, brother: are you getting attached?”
Something inside me roars with indignation. Me? Attached? To a woman? Fuck no. “She’s a plaything, nothing more.” Why do those words feel so wooden and rehearsed? So utterly and obviously bullshit? Instead of letting Nikolai point that out, I change the subject. “Need I remind you that you’re here so that we can discuss Sobakin, not so that you can grill me about Alyssa?”
Niko is unmoved. “Both things concern me.”
“Neither one should. I’m handling the situation with Alyssa and I have a plan for Boris.”
That gets his attention. “Do you?”
“The Black Rose. The whole city knows it’s just a front for his drug ring. If we stage a little ambush like we’ve been planning, take down a few of his men in the process, we can remind him of who exactly he’s dealing with.”
Nikolai cocks an eyebrow. “We’ve been over this, Uri. We can’t just launch an attack on a popular nightclub without the cops getting involved.”
“You forget about Vincent.”
“Imbroglio?”
I nod. “LAPD has been tipped off about Sobakin’s drug ring but he’s too powerful for them to deal with. They’ve tried a handful of underground sting operations that have failed. So if we wanna get a little messy in the Black Rose, the police department is willing to turn a blind eye.”
Nikolai has that constipated look on his face that usually means he’s impressed but doesn’t want to admit it. “What about Igor? You’re sure he’s dead?”
“Yes.”
“Why?”
“Because if I were Boris, I’d have gutted him the first chance I got.”
Nikolai sighs. Then he finishes his vodka and salutes me with the empty glass. “We can nail the fucker to the floor. As long as we can stay clear of… distractions.”
I grimace. Subtlety has never been Nikolai’s strong suit. But, for all his other flaws, he knows when to take his exit.