His hand braced his weight beside my head, and he rose over me, his beautiful face hovering just above mine. “Tell me this is what you really want.”
“I already said I do.” I cradled his cheeks, memorized everything about the way he looked right now. His blue eyes were crystal clear, his pupils near blown, his cheeks flush with color. And he was right . . . I would die if I had to take another breath without feeling him inside me.
“Say it again.” His jaw flexed, and his hand gripped my hip.
“I want you, Nathaniel,” I whispered, leaning up to kiss him. “So take me.”
He held my gaze as if there was any chance I’d change my mind, and then he pushed in, and in, and in, consuming every inch of my body, and then demanding more, until there was no me. No him. Only us.
He stretched me to my limit, and we both moaned.
He didn’t ask if I was okay. He didn’t need to, not when I rocked my hips against his and kissed him. I was more than okay. I was fucking fabulous.
His hips withdrew until he was almost entirely out of me, and then he drove back in, and I cried out, my arms wrapping around him as he started a brutal, perfect rhythm of slow, hard thrusts.
“We. Should. Move. To. The. Bed.” His words were punctuated with each swing of his hips.
“Bed later. Harder now.” It was all I could say. He’d robbed me of all the other words that weren’t his name.
“We can do this again, right?” he asked against my mouth. “Not just on the table.”
“As many times as you can take.” How he could string together a coherent thought was beyond me. I locked my ankles around the small of his back and rocked up, meeting every thrust.
“Challenge accepted.” He grinned, and his dimple appeared.
My heart jolted with how much I loved this man.
He kissed me deep, his tongue rubbing against mine with the same rhythm as his body took mine, driving me toward another release. We strained and gasped. We came together again, and again, and again, and somehow each time he slid home was better than the last, until my body teetered on the edge of an abyss, strung so tight that my breath came in little keening pants against his lips.
“Fuck, you feel so damned good,” he said, his breathing just as ragged as mine. “I’m never going to get enough of you. The way you squeeze me. The way your skin feels against mine. The way your eyes darken. Yes, just. Like. That.”
He reached between our bodies and gave me exactly what I needed, sending me hurtling into oblivion with the next thrust.
I came apart, unraveled, and was remade all within the same breath, with his name on my lips and his back beneath my fingers. The high was incomprehensible, unfathomable, indescribable, and all I could do was ride the waves as his hips swung wildly, chasing his own release as I found mine.
He shuddered above me and came with a shout of his own, catching his weight before he even had the chance to crush me once it was over.
We stared at each other, neither of us able to catch our breaths. Both watching the other as though they held the key to the very universe. Slowly, I fell back into my body and let my ankles fall from his back.
“As many times as I can take,” he said, his mouth curving into the most beautiful smile I’d ever seen. “That’s what you said, right?”
I nodded.
“All we have is tonight.” His brow furrowed, and I knew what he was saying.
This didn’t change things. Our timing still wasn’t right. He was going back to his unit tomorrow, and I was flying back to DC.
“Then we’d better make it count.” I stroked my fingers over his cheek.
We did.
But I still cried when I boarded my flight the next day.
CHAPTER NINETEEN
IZZY
Kandahar, Afghanistan
August 2021
One second I was fighting with Nate, and the next, he took me to the ground, covering me with his body as glass shattered. My heart beat into my throat, and my entire body locked.
The sound of another blast mingled with the screams of the girls and their parents.
“Rockets!” one of the operators behind us shouted, but I couldn’t see which one.
“Fuck,” Nate swore. Then his arms swept around me, and I was against his chest as he stood and moved with what felt like inhuman speed, quickly carrying me behind a nearby wall. Once my feet were on the ground, we crouched and he tucked me under his arm. Then he motioned to the chess team, saying something to them in a language I didn’t speak.
They all scurried toward us as another blast sounded, and a flurry of Afghan soldiers ran by. Three more explosions sounded in quick succession.
Fear tasted like metal in my mouth. I would never forgive myself if I got these girls killed—if by coming here, I cost Nate his life.
“I know. You’re sitting ducks out there,” Nate said, and I noted the button in his hand. He was using his radio. “Go. Bring the gunships back with you.”
The next explosion made the wall shudder, and Nate held me tighter.
“We can’t do anything,” he explained, even though I didn’t ask. “The rockets are probably being fired from miles away. All we can do is wait.”
I nodded, trying to force a reassuring smile for the girl closest to me—Kaameh. I recognized her from the hours I’d spent on their paperwork. Her mother sheltered her the best she could.
The others were covered by their parents and, in one case, an Afghan soldier.
The sound of rotors grew dimmer and dimmer through the shattered window. The helicopters were leaving.
I jolted when another round of explosions sounded, and Nate didn’t even flinch as he surveyed everything around us. He’d always been vigilant whenever we’d been together in the past, always looking, always watching everyone else, and now I understood why. Those reactions I worried about for all those years were the ones that kept him alive over here.
A minute passed, and then another, without anything blowing up.
“I think it’s over,” Sergeant Gray said from the other side of the waiting area, his back pressed to the opposite wall.
“Agreed,” another called out.
“Helos are gone. Nothing left for them to care about,” someone else added.
Nate’s hand cradled my cheek as he tipped my chin up. “Are you hurt?”
I shook my head, unable to make my tongue work.
He pulled back and looked me over for himself as the other operators moved in, checking on the chess team and their parents. “You’re all right.”
I started nodding and couldn’t stop.
“It’s okay, Izzy.” He tugged me against him. “It’s just shock and adrenaline. It will pass. Just take deep breaths.”
I forced air through my lungs one breath at a time until my galloping heart slowed to a canter, then a trot, and finally a steady walk.
“There you go,” he said softly, gently rubbing his hand up and down my back. “Gray, get me a situation report.”
Gray took off.
“If you could have any superpower in the world, what would it be?” he asked.
I blinked.