Understanding came into Aria’s face as she stepped forward. Noelle stood, meeting her in the living room area and holding out her hand. “Hi, Aria.”
“Hi, Noelle,” Aria said, her gaze moving over Noelle’s features and then doing a quick assessing sweep of her body. She saw discomfort in her eyes and noticed that her cheeks were flushed. And she heard familiarity in the way Aria said her name. This must be the contact at the police department that Evan had mentioned.
She was young and very pretty in a sweet and wholesome way, and when Noelle glanced at her hand, she saw that she wasn’t wearing a ring. If Evan wasn’t involved with her, she’d have been surprised. And, damn, but she hadn’t expected that hot sweep of jealousy that flashed through her, making her feel itchy and insecure. She hadn’t expected to feel the very opposite of wholesome, the way she had after she’d exited that cage. She’d thought she left that feeling behind years ago.
Clearly Aria Dixon was displeased by her presence, but still, she smiled, and despite the discomfort in it, it looked sincere. “Evan’s spoken of you. It’s nice to meet you,” she said.
Noelle nodded, feeling even more off balance. If Evan had spoken of her, it was clearly regarding their past. He was looking into the case, and Aria was helping him dig, and so naturally, he would have had to confide in her about their experience. It had been a long time since she’d been around people who knew the details of what she’d been through when she was still a teenager, and it made her feel exposed and vulnerable. For a brief moment, it made her feel like the shy, ostracized girl she’d once been, standing in the presence of this strong, well-put-together woman. This uncomplicated, beautiful, available woman. This cop. “It’s nice to meet you, too,” she murmured.
The moment grew more awkward as they all looked between each other, Evan seeming to come into the present as he took a step forward. “Aria, would you like a drink?”
“No, no. It’s been a long day. I’m headed home. I’m sorry to bother you. Noelle, again, nice to meet you.” She turned and walked back out the open door, and Evan met Noelle’s eyes, a spark of guilt in his. He released a breath, looked as if he was considering saying something, but then turned and went after Aria.
Unsure whether or not to shut his front door behind him, Noelle stood there, watching as he jogged to where she was walking down the path toward the street. He touched her arm, and she stopped, turning and saying something that made him stick his hands in his pockets and look like a chastised little boy.
Words floated to Noelle, and she was able to string together that Aria felt used. He’d asked her to provide information for him to find a way to reunite with Noelle, “the woman who makes your voice get all wobbly every time you say her name, while I wait around like a pathetic puppy.” Noelle grimaced. Aria’s voice had risen, allowing Noelle to hear the entirety of that sentence. She stepped away from the door. Nothing about what Aria was saying was true, of course, but the woman obviously felt scorned. Which meant that they were either involved or had been.
Maybe she should leave. But then she’d have to walk past them to do so.
Evan and Aria exchanged a few more words that appeared terse, and then Aria pulled something out of the bag she had on her shoulder, shoving it at him. He really had no choice but to take it, stepping back with the force of her handoff. Then she turned, holding up her key fob and clicking it. A red SUV parked at the curb flashed its lights.
Evan stood there for a moment looking torn, but then he turned, making his way slowly back to Noelle. “If you want to go after her, Evan—”
“I don’t.” He came inside and closed the door behind him. He set the folder down on the table and sat back down, running a hand through his hair, leaving it sticking up in the front. She had a sudden, brief flash of the way his hair had looked in that cage. Overgrown, greasy. Messy in a similar yet different way than it was now. She dropped into her seat. “Sorry about that awkwardness,” he said.
“You don’t owe me an apology.” She folded her napkin over, and then folded it again. “You have a life. Relationships. And I don’t want to make anyone feel uncomfortable. If she got the wrong impression, you should go fix it.”
“Should I?”
She raised her eyes, her hand stilling where she was fiddling with the napkin. “Should you what?”
“Set her straight on what’s going on with us?”
“Going on with us? There’s nothing going on with us.”
“No?”
“No. We’re investigating the crime we both lived through. What do you mean?”
A muscle in his jaw tightened. “Jesus, Noelle. Are we going to dance around this? You used to be more honest than that.”
She let out a short humorless laugh that communicated her sudden offense. Clearly, this was coming from whatever had just happened with Aria, but she didn’t fully understand it. Sure, she felt the tension in the air when they locked eyes. And, yes, she was attracted to him, who wouldn’t be? But so what? “I’m not dancing around anything,” she insisted. “Some things should just be left alone. We already decided that.”
“Things change.”
“What changed?”
“Well, we have a daughter, for one.”
“Yes, and we were just trying to figure that out.”
His nostrils flared slightly. “Don’t you think we should try to figure out what’s between us too? Still?”
“Figure out what’s between us? We already figured that out. Long ago. And it isn’t good for anyone.”
“Like I said, things change, Noelle. It’s been seven years since we decided that. We’re reinvestigating the crime we were victims of because new information came to light. Don’t you think it might be worth reinvestigating us too?”
“No,” she said, standing, the chair tipping backward and falling to the floor. “Stop it. What is this?” He stood, too, and she turned away. He came up behind her, and she halted as though his body were a magnet keeping her from pulling away. He put his hands on her upper arms and gently turned her to face him. “There’s even more reason now than there was then not to revisit us, Evan,” she said. She couldn’t stand it. Even talking about it hurt and made her remember exactly what it had felt like in the months after she’d left the hotel room that day, even before she’d found out she was pregnant. In a way, her pregnancy had helped mitigate the terrible grief of their separation because though she knew it was in both their best interests not to be together, she had a small part of him with her. Always. And it was enough. More than that.
Her daughter was the very air she breathed. She was the living embodiment of what could never be but was. The most beautiful paradox. Callie. She turned her face, lowering her chin. “It’s good that you’re seeing someone else, Evan. She should be your priority, not me.”
“I’m not seeing her.” He swore, stepping away. She felt relieved. And bereft.
“Sleeping with her, whatever. It’s good. It’s healthy. You don’t have to explain anything to me.”
She met his gaze and saw the anger there, the frustration. God, where had this come from? And why had it flared like this? It must mean that he had kept it tamped down and Aria showing up like that had set it off. “And you, Noelle? What about you? Are you having healthy sex with someone? A few someones, maybe?” His eyes flashed. She saw the anger, but she also saw the hurt. “Did it help?” he asked, taking a step toward her again. They were close once more, and still she couldn’t move away. You can, Noelle. You don’t want to. Evan’s right. You used to be more honest. “That day in the hotel room? I’ve wondered. I’ve wondered a lot, actually. Did it help you loosen up? Were you able to enjoy yourself with other men because of me?”
“Stop it,” she said, and even she heard the tears that threatened in the sogginess of her voice.