“No.” His brow furrows. “No, I want you to stay here with me.”
“Okay, just wanted to make sure.” I smile and then start to move past him when he presses his hand to my stomach, stopping me.
“You sure you’re okay?”
“Positive.”
I know he’s not convinced, but he lets go of me. He moves toward the bathroom while I make my way to the bed and slip under the covers. This time, I just use my pillow, staying on my side while my mind races. I probably just messed up my friendship. It was amazing when his mouth was on me. I got so lost, so quick, and in the moment, I didn’t care about anything other than the friction and heat we were creating.
Was it really all worth it?
Was it worth ruining this friendship?
Fresh from the bathroom, Breaker walks up to the bed, where he slips in. I half expect him to stay on his side, but he pulls me close to his chest by the stomach and buries his head in my hair.
I’m breathless, unsure of what to do.
He’s snuggling again.
He’s spooning me.
His entire body is in control of mine.
“You sure you’re good?” he asks, his breath caressing the back of my neck.
“Yes,” I whisper, my heart racing a mile a minute.
“Okay. Night, Lia.”
I swallow hard and whisper, “Night, Breaker.”
He snuggles in closer while I lie there, wide awake.
Instead of falling asleep, I remain restless, captured in his strong arm, battling between reveling in the way he holds me so close and freaking out that I just ruined everything.
When he drifts off and his grip loosens, I take that moment to slip out of bed, out of his bedroom, and over to my apartment, where I lie awake the rest of the night.
You fucked up, Lia.
You fucked up big time.
Chapter Seventeen
BREAKER
Smiling to myself, remembering last night as if it was just a minute ago, I stretch my arm out to the side to bring Lia in close to me, but when my arm hits the empty mattress, I crack my eyes open to find nothing but an empty bed.
“Fuck,” I mutter as I press the heel of my palm to my eye.
She ran.
I should have fucking known.
In the moment—God, it was amazing—she was right there with me.
But after, even though she didn’t want to admit it, I felt her running as fast as she could. Mentally, she was checking out of the possibility of an us and freaking out over the fact that there could possibly be an us.
I sit up in my bed and look around the room for any trace of her. Maybe, if I’m lucky, she’s in the kitchen or the living room with her favorite cup of coffee, but then again, I don’t smell it.
I quickly go to the bathroom as a dull throb starts pounding at the base of my skull, reminding me of the many drinks I had last night.
I’d like to say mistakes were made all around, but to me, last night wasn’t a mistake. The only thing I regret is not talking this out and not following my gut instinct that she wasn’t okay afterwards.
But I don’t regret teasing her.
I don’t regret biting my way across her supple chest.
I don’t regret the way her warm center felt sliding over my length.
And I don’t fucking regret hearing her moan as she brought herself to orgasm.
I wash my hands and move toward the living room and kitchen, which is completely empty.
Just what I suspected. So without another thought, I walk out of my apartment, down the hall, and knock on her door.
I wait a few moments, and when she doesn’t open, I knock again.
A few more seconds and nothing.
Panic starts to set in.
“Lia, you in there?” I knock.
Dead silent.
Fuck.
I go back to my apartment, and I find my phone. I consider calling her, but for some reason, I have a feeling that will go straight to voicemail, so I text her instead, trying to keep it light and not clingy or pathetic at all, even though that’s how I’m feeling.
Breaker: Morning, here I thought I was going to have to make you breakfast. Looks like I lucked out.
I set my phone down and go to the kitchen, where I make a pot of coffee, grab the Ibuprofen from my cabinet, and toss a frozen breakfast burrito in the microwave. While everything is cooking and brewing, I grip the kitchen counter and stare down at my phone, willing it to ding with a text.
When my coffee finishes brewing and the breakfast burrito is done, and I don’t have a response, sheer panic sets in.
“Fuck,” I whisper as I push my hand through my hair.
What did I do?
Huxley and JP were right. I should have just been the friend she needed last night. I should have kept my hands to myself. I should never have ripped her shirt and sucked on her tits.
That was so fucking—
Ding.
“Oh, thank fuck!” I shout as I lift my phone and see it’s a text from her.
Lia: What would you have made?
Relief washes over me at her lighthearted response.
On a sigh, I sit down with my burrito, Ibuprofen, and coffee and text her back.
Breaker: Currently eating a breakfast burrito from the freezer, so maybe that.
Lia: Really, you would have heated up a breakfast burrito? Wow.
Breaker: What would you have wanted?
Lia: A Danish at least.
Breaker: Well, if you’d have asked, I would have retrieved.
Lia: Shame. Now we’ll never know.
Breaker: Why did you leave? Was I not letting you hog the bed?
Lia: Early morning meeting.
Ehh, why don’t I believe that?
Probably because I know her schedule, and she never, and I mean never, has an early morning meeting. That’s just not how she operates. If she has a meeting with clients, it’s always midmorning or afternoon. Early morning isn’t in her vocabulary.
Breaker: You lying to me?
Lia: Do you really think I’d lie to you?
Yes.
I do.
And she is.
So I can either sit back and go with her lie, or be the person I’ve always been with her and be honest. The easier way out is to go with the lie. But the best things in life are never easy, so I decide to call her out.
Breaker: After what happened last night, you’d lie.
It takes her a few moments to text back, but she does thankfully.
Lia: Can we not talk about last night?
Breaker: Why, do you regret it?
Please say no. Please say no.
Lia: I . . . I don’t know, Breaker. It was . . . weird.
Breaker: Wow, can’t hear that enough.
Lia: Not like that. I mean . . . the during part was, well, it was amazing, but you’re you and that makes this weird.
Breaker: I get that, but that doesn’t mean you need to pull away.
Lia: I’m not, I’m just taking a second to digest what happened. I mean a lot happened. We learned a lot about each other in a few short minutes.
Breaker: I didn’t learn anything, just confirmed a lot of things in my head. Fucking amazing tits that taste like heaven.
I know I shouldn’t say it, but I don’t want her thinking that I believe any of that was a mistake because it wasn’t. It was . . . it was the start of something new, and I don’t want to shy away from it.