“How do you know all of that?” I ask. “I mean, what happened to you?”
But as soon as the words are out, I wish I could take them back. The last thing I want him to think is that I’m mining him for his tragedies, the way I’ve felt so many others do to me. “Sorry,” I say. “You don’t need to answer that.”
We are pulling into the apartment complex where I live now, the streetlights lighting up the inside of the car. Lighting up Sean’s face.
“Seventeen-ten,” I say. “Up there on the right.” And Sean pulls up in the empty parking spot in front of my front door.
“Well,” I say. “Thanks for the ride.” I look out the window, there’s so much rain pounding down it’s like the whole world is underwater. It’s like here, in this car with Sean, is the only safe place left on earth.
“No problem,” he says.
I reach down and unfasten my seat belt. “So…um.” I know I’m supposed to get out now, but I am struck with the sudden intensity of how much I do not want to. “Well…thanks again.” I cringe, hearing myself. This is ridiculous. I have to go.
I start to reach for the door handle and glance over at him one last time. Our eyes meet and there’s that flash again.
Sean takes a deep breath.
“I had a brother once,” he says. His hair flops over one eye and he pushes it away. “But he died.”
My breath catches in my throat. The rain starts pounding harder now, and there is thunder in the distance.
“What?” I blink.
I watch his mouth.
“My brother died,” he says again. “So that’s how I know about that stuff I said.”
I raise my hand up to my mouth. “Oh God.”
He smiles this sad half smile. “It was a long time ago.” He looks down, looks back up, his face is flushed. “If there was even the slightest chance that I could see him again, that there was something I could do to make that possible, I would never stop trying. Ever. This is fate, Ellie, me meeting you, I think. Because I don’t have a chance to get my brother back. Nothing I do can change the fact that he’s gone. But maybe what I’m supposed to do now is help you.” Sean pauses. “Do you think that sounds crazy?”
I shake my head. I feel something inside me warming up.
“So should I come in, then?” he says. “Maybe see the drawing?”
I hesitate for only the tiniest shred of a second, enough time for me to look through all that rain at the front windows of our building and remember that my mother is working the night shift tonight, which means she is gone now and won’t be home until early in the morning.
“Yeah,” I say quietly. “That would be great.”
Ten
I realize, as we walk into my room, that this is the first time a guy has ever been up here.
I try and imagine how it must look to Sean, messy unmade bed, a dresser, a nightstand, a desk, a few items of clothing tossed around on the floor. It probably looks like no one spends much time in here, which is true since I’m almost always at Amanda’s.
I sit on my bed and Sean sits in my desk chair and I continue explaining Nina’s drawing. “So then I called the number on there but the guy didn’t know anything, didn’t even remember her. And the guy at the Mothership says he just found the book in the basement and it was practically empty when I was down there, and even if there were any more clues there, they’re all burned up now.”
Sean reaches out his hand and I give him the drawing. My fingertips brush against his, just for a moment. I am very aware of it. Sean holds the drawing close to his face and stares. He doesn’t move, he doesn’t blink, it doesn’t even look like he’s breathing. And I’m wondering if he’s beginning to regret offering to help me since he is probably quickly realizing how futile this is.
“No pressure,” I say. “I mean, or…” And then I stop because Sean’s mouth has just dropped open, and then this huge grin spreads over his face. “Ellie,” he says slowly. His eyes are shining. “Did you notice this?” He jumps off the chair and lands next to me on the bed. He flips the drawing over so I can see the fake credit card printed on the back.
“What about it?” My heart is pounding.
“This is a cardboard credit card.” He taps it with his finger.
I nod, blinking. “Right.”
“And do you know where people get these? With credit card offers in the mail…” Sean is nodding at me, trying to lead me to his conclusion. “So…”
I shake my head slowly. “So…”
“So, your sister turned eighteen only a couple months before she left, right? Credit card companies have this list, of all the people in America who are about to turn eighteen. So they can start sending them credit card offers right around their birthday and sucker them in.”