“I’ll have to take your word for that one.”
“Like me and you, Tom. Am I your brother or your half brother? Does it matter what it’s called? Look—okay, so you wanted me to admit that my old man used to get after us and beat us, and I wouldn’t before. I was a dick, I know. Well, I’ll admit it now, right here. He used to beat us and terrorize us when he drank. And he used to come down on you most of all, probably because you weren’t really his kid. You see—I said it, Tom. I said it. You were right about my dad and all of that.”
“Thank you.”
“It’s the truth. But something else is the truth, too. I used to protect you, Tom. I used to put my body over yours. I tried to get in between you and him. I know you remember that, too. See, that’s what I’m talking about. There’s a bond there, one that can’t be broken by some circumstances.”
“Go on,” I said. “What about Colter and Brooks?”
“When she disappeared, I thought of those guys. Maybe I had talked about her too much around them.”
“So you knew Colter?”
“I knew of him at the time. He didn’t know me. I thought of going to the police, but what did I know? Really? That I knew a guy who might know a guy who might have taken my niece?”
“You tell them anything you know.”
“Like you told them about me after last night? I know they came to you asking about me. Did you cover for me? Did you protect me?”
“I shouldn’t have.”
“Did you tell them about the girl we saw here in the cemetery? That little girl.”
“Why didn’t you say anything about this?”
“I had a record. They busted me for being naked by a school. And the drugs. What were they going to do with me?” He shrugged again and walked in a small circle.
I looked over to the cemetery and saw Colter’s figure in the dark. Listening. Waiting.
Buster came back to me and stood even closer. “I decided to check it out myself. I asked Brooks about it, if he knew about Colter and the little girls. He said Colter was a creep and a pervert, but he didn’t think he had anyone in the house. He’d been in there a few times. He hadn’t seen anything, or so he said.”
“Caitlin says she heard your voice in Colter’s house.”
Buster shook his head. “No, no. Never. I didn’t know where he lived. Brooks put me off. He said he dealt with unpleasant people, but he didn’t know anything about Caitlin. Tom, if I had gone there, if I had been in that house, I would have turned it upside down. I wouldn’t have left without Caitlin. Never.”
His words rang true to me. Despite Colter’s story, I believed my brother. I believed him.
“Why didn’t you tell the police I’m meeting Colter here tonight? You could have stopped all of this.”
“The cops are looking for me now because of what Brooks’s girlfriend told them. I can’t make contact with them. They want to lock me up. And I wanted to come find you. And help you. After last night, with the fight and everything, I wanted to be the one to help you see this from a different angle. You’re not seeing it clearly yet, okay? But you still can. You can just get back in the car and drive her home. That’s all you have to do.”
“It’s that easy?”
“It really is.”
“What about the rest of our lives?”
“I don’t know . . .”
“You see, something happened in that house, in that basement room. Something happened that transformed my daughter and transformed my life. I need to know what it was. If it was able to so profoundly, so completely turn me off the course of my life, I need to know about it. All about it.”
“You can’t.”
“Why not?”
“Because . . . it’s gone. And you weren’t there. And whatever it is or was . . . it’s not really relevant to your life now. It’s not going to change the past.”
“What will?” I asked.
And I meant it. What would wipe the past away, clean the slate?
Buster pointed to the car.
“You know what to do.”
I moved to the back of the car and took out my keys.
Chapter Fifty-six
Before I could reach the car, the driver’s door came open. Caitlin looked scared, disoriented, in the faint glow from the dome light. She must have slid back over the seat into the front and opened the lock. She came out into the night, looking back and forth between Buster and me.
“Where’s John?” she said. “Is he here?”
I nodded toward the cemetery. “He’s here,” I said, but I put my hand on Caitlin’s arm.
“Let me go.”
“We’re leaving, Caitlin.”
I held on to her and released the door locks with my fob. I maneuvered her toward the backseat of the car again.
“You promised,” she said.
I pulled the back door open and had her halfway in when Colter came running up.
“Hey!” he said.
“John! John!”