Always the Vampire

I frowned. “Then why are they down the street?”


“Because we told the officers we mistook the address,” the man said. He pulled up his trousers and puffed out his polo-shirt-clad chest. “Since there was a rather raucous altercation in progress down there, they believed us.”

“Now be honest, Clarence,” the woman inserted with a pat on the old man’s arm. “It helped that we’re seniors.” She looked up at me. “People expect seniors to get confused, you know.”

“So true, Imelda,” Clarence agreed.

I concurred. I’d turned 228 my last birthday, and I was sure confused at the moment.

“Here now, let us assist you in getting this young man to the car,” Clarence said as he trotted up the steps. “Mother, you open the car door.”

He moved so fast, he was three stairs short of the deck before I moved to block Triton.

“Sir, thank you, but I can help my friend.”

“Nonsense, Princess. I was a fireman. I know how to carry a person without hurting my back.”

“Princess?” I echoed.

“You’re the vampire tour guide. Cesca. Francesca, Princess Vampire.”

“Yes, but—”

“My dear girl, Melda and I are vampires as well. I promise you, I will neither drop this strapping young man nor harm him in any way.”

“You’re vampires.”

I turned to Triton, who shrugged.

“You didn’t know? Oh, but of course you did,” Clarence chirped and turned to Triton. “Right, then. Up you go.”

Clarence levered Triton onto one shoulder and secured his hold on Triton’s leg and arm. When Clarence straightened, he levitated just above the stair treads and flew down them instead of walking.

“This way is less jostling, don’t you think?” the old man said over his shoulder.

I nodded absently, wondering why Saber didn’t know about these two vamps. Or was he keeping that information from me? And how had I pegged them as human? Damn good questions, but for the moment I lingered long enough to lock Triton’s door and sped to catch up as Clarence gently lowered Triton onto the SSR’s passenger seat.

Melda patted my arm. “There now, not to worry. Your friend will be fine as soon as he shifts.”

I blinked at the wrinkled face. “Shifts, ma’am?”

“Oh, we won’t mention it to a soul,” she assured me.

“But how do you know he shifts?”

“Because we’re vampires, of course. We sense it.”

I had such a headache coming on.

The car door closed, and Clarence laid a light hand on Imelda’s shoulder.

I shook off my latest shock. “Thank you, both of you.”

Melda waved a hand. “It’s nothing, dear. Drive carefully.”

They stepped around me and walked off down the street. I knew I should let it go, but I couldn’t.

“Wait, Mr. and Mrs.—”

“Clarke,” Melda supplied.

I nodded. “Forgive me, but have you been vampires long?”

Clarence grinned. “You’re wondering why we’re old, is it?”

“Father, don’t tease her,” Melda scolded. “The short version, dear, is that a young punk vampire caught us returning to our retirement village and Turned us. That was fifteen years ago. We were eighty-five then.”

“But why would he Turn you instead of draining you?”

“He wanted us to serve as his grandparents,” Clarence said. “Forever.”

“But my dear husband,” Melda said with pride, “finally grew strong enough to kill the little criminal. We went to the Vampire Protection people, and they’ve been kind enough to relocate us.”

“Relocated you to where?”

“Why here, of course. We’re renting in this neighborhood until we can find the perfect house for our special project.”

Special project? Why didn’t that sound like a good thing?

“That’s right,” Clarence said with a wide grin. “We’re opening a bed and breakfast exclusively for vampires.”

Ai-yi-yi. Could the day get any more bizarre?

Minutes later, Clarence and Melda disappeared, and I sat at the steering wheel rubbing my temples.

“The Clarke’s knew, Triton. That you were in trouble, but also that you’d be shifting tonight. They called the cops to save you then waved them off to the house down the block so you wouldn’t be detained giving a statement.”

“Instead I’m detained listening to you rant. Can we go now?”

“You don’t get it. They sensed your nature, but I didn’t sense theirs.”

“I do get it. You’re worried your otherness radar is busted.”

“Or I never had it. At this rate, I won’t recognize the Void if it smacks me in the face.”

“Sure you will. It looks like a rolling oil spill, now drive.”

“I have to call Saber.”

Triton growled.

“En route,” I added, as I started the SSR. “Which beach do you shift on?”

“Try the pier,” he said, meaning the St. Augustine Beach fishing pier.

The police cars were gone when I cruised past the corner. Triton didn’t notice because he was slumped against the car door, eyes closed. At least his color was better.