All the Things We Didn't Say

Going to a pool seemed as good as going anywhere else. Claire packed a bag quickly, and we walked back down to the street. Frannie ran ahead of us, dodging around people walking their dogs, and piles of leftover slush. ‘So, this is kind of crazy, right?’ I said. ‘You and me. Walking down the street like this.’

 

 

‘It is.’ Claire grinned, but really didn’t seem that surprised. ‘That’s the Internet for you, though. Everybody finds everybody.’

 

‘So what happened to the kittens you found?’

 

‘Oh, some lady took all three of them. She was one of those cat people.’

 

‘How long have you been in DC?’ I asked.

 

‘I went to school here for a while, at the University of Maryland,’ Claire explained. ‘One summer, I got a job with Greenpeace. I thought I was really going to be doing something good, you know? But basically, I was stationed at intersections, accosting passersby about the environment. If they walked on without saying anything, we tried to make them feel guilty-if all the icecaps melted, it would be their fault.’ She sighed. ‘I hated it, but I did it all summer.’

 

‘Why?’

 

‘Well, because I needed the job, for one. And because Frannie’s father worked there. Or, I guess, her future father. Thomas. He accosted people, too.’ She glanced at me and smiled. ‘I work for a different environmental group now, and so does he. We’re not yelling at people on the street anymore. We both work behind desks. I do the graphics, design the website, that sort of fun stuff. It’s nice, actually.’

 

‘My brother does web work, too,’ I volunteered. ‘Steven.’

 

‘Steven!’ Claire’s mouth dropped. ‘How is he? Still obsessed with math and the military?’

 

‘Not really,’ I said with a laugh, touched that Claire remembered.

 

Claire ran ahead and grabbed Frannie’s hand before she swept across the street. As she pulled her daughter in closer, wrapping her arms around Frannie’s tiny body, she looked at me knowingly. ‘Thomas and I aren’t married. I saw you checking, earlier.’

 

‘I’m sorry,’ I said haltingly. ‘It doesn’t matter…’

 

‘It’s okay,’ Claire assured me.

 

Frannie tapped Claire’s arm. ‘Are we going to go off the high dive?’

 

‘Maybe. If you’re good.’

 

‘Can I try a flip?’

 

‘No.’

 

Frannie stomped her little foot. Claire ignored her.

 

‘So what about you?’ Claire asked when the light changed. ‘What are you doing in Annapolis?’

 

‘My boyfriend lives there,’ I said. I felt funny volunteering this, remembering how Claire had offered up potential boyfriends for me in high school, always people in her clique, and I’d turned them down. I felt younger than her, without responsibility or anything to show for myself. It was the same way I always felt around Claire. ‘We live together.’

 

‘So it’s serious.’

 

‘Well…I don’t know.’ What did I mean? I didn’t know.

 

The Y’s lobby brimmed with kids. There was a big poster behind the desk with information about swimming lessons and participants. The swimming lesson skill levels were divided by types of fish: those just learning to swim were the Pike class, then Eel, Starfish, Polliwog, Guppy, and Shark. Frannie noticed me looking. ‘I’m a Starfish.’ She pointed to her name on the poster. ‘I can tread water for ten minutes.’

 

‘That’s wonderful,’ I told her.

 

‘She’s the youngest Starfish in the group.’ Claire fished out her membership card. ‘It was terrifying when I first saw that they just let them swim. Without swimming arms and whatever. I thought for sure she was going to drown.’ She handed her card across the table to the girl behind the desk, a teenager wearing a woolen hat with earflaps. ‘Now she’s going off that crazy platform diving board and everything.’

 

‘So, do you like it here?’ I asked Claire as we proceeded to the locker room. ‘In DC?’

 

‘Sure,’ Claire said, plunking her nylon bag down on one of the locker room’s benches. ‘There’s a lot to do here. My job is good.’

 

‘Do you ever go back to Brooklyn?’

 

Claire looked down. ‘Not really. My parents both remarried, did you know? My mom lives in Virginia. So she’s close. It’s nice.’

 

In a flash of guilt, I remembered the Fun Saver camera I’d stolen from Claire’s mother. I opened my mouth and shut it again.

 

Frannie had migrated across the locker room and was talking to another little girl who was taller than her. She put her hands on her hips bossily and whispered something in the girl’s ear. When a new cluster of girls came into the locker room, Frannie started waving. ‘Madison! Heather!’ She broke away from the first girl and ran to the new ones.

 

Claire snorted. ‘We call Frannie the mayor of the pool. She talks to anyone. She’s not afraid of anything.’

 

‘Kind of like you,’ I said.

 

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