‘He didn’t know what I was doing. He came to help. And when I told him he . . . shut me out. Made it so that . . .’
‘After everything else, I’m not sure that he could have lived with you dying as well,’ Lucy said. Her tone suggested this was the first and only time they’d talk about Vic like this. As she mourned, so she was tolerating Holly’s shameful grief as well.
‘Lucy . . .’ Holly began, but she could think of nothing to say.
‘I’ve lost him,’ Lucy said, and she started to sob. ‘Olivia has lost him. It’s all so final.’
‘It might be a beginning.’
Lucy looked at her at last. Holly held her gaze, determined not to look away. ‘Maybe,’ Lucy muttered, wiping her eyes. She looked towards her daughter. ‘But I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to shake this feeling of distance.’
Holly looked down into the shallow valley at the scar where the breach had been. It was bare stone now, an almost perfect circle of ground where all soil and life had been erased and replaced with a slowly cooling surface of molten rock. A moment after coming through she’d felt a thump at her back, a nudge, as if someone was urging her on a second before heat blasted out . . . and then nothing. People kept away from it now, partly because of the heat but mostly because they were scared. Exactly where we are and a trillion light years away, Holly thought.
‘I hope the sense of distance will fade over time,’ Holly said.
‘I don’t want Olivia to be told. Not until I’m ready. I’ve told her that Daddy saved us all, and he’s trying to find his way back.’
‘It’s all so strange,’ Holly said. ‘Maybe that’s . . .’ That’s right, she wanted to say. But tears threatened now, and she could say no more. She had no right to cry in front of Lucy, and she tried to hold back.
‘Breakfast is ready.’ Lucy stood and walked downhill towards her child.
The tears came, and Holly watched Vic’s wife blur in her vision as she moved away.
Later, as they were preparing to leave and Drake’s guards came in from where they had been keeping watch on the surrounding hilltops, Marc approached Holly.
‘We need to talk to Drake,’ he said. ‘Just the three of us.’ He was carrying reams of paper in a rucksack that had been given to him by one of the Gaians. He no longer carried a weapon. He was a scientist among warriors, and word had slowly spread about what he would attempt. Holly could tell that Marc would never be someone comfortable with attention.
They found Drake and took him to one side, walking up towards a ridge from where Holly hoped she would finally get a proper view of Gaia. Moira and another woman kept pace with them twenty steps behind, keeping watch. There was still danger here.
‘There are almost forty of us,’ Marc said to Drake as they walked. ‘Have you thought about that? About how it might impact on your community here?’
Drake was silent for a time. They kicked through grass heavy with dew. Breakfast lay comfortably in Holly’s stomach. She didn’t think she’d tasted anything quite so perfect in years.
‘Things have changed,’ Drake said at last. ‘You’ll have a big impact on us. There’s room, but barely. You don’t know this world and its dangers, the places you can go, and those you can’t. You’ll be sharing sleeping quarters, and all of you will have to contribute. But you brought hope with you.’
‘Jayne,’ Holly said.
‘The girl, yes,’ Drake nodded. ‘But also Jonah.’
‘But how can we ever know?’ she asked.
‘We’ll keep casting,’ Drake said. ‘And over time, if we find Earths that remain uninfected, we’ll know that he released the infection to the Inquisitor’s world. That’s given us something to live for.’
‘Seems to me you have plenty to live for,’ Holly said. They’d reached the ridge now, and looking west she could see where the rising sun was playing across wooded hilltops and casting shadows into hidden valleys. There were furies out there, lying beneath the moss of forest floors and waiting to rise. But this was home to them all, and there was so much beauty here.